Firing up the lantern

One of my favorite ancient characters is Diogenes of Sinope. Born in Turkey about 400 years before Christ, he was a student of Antisthenes (444-370 BC), who was himself a pupil of Socrates. His philosophy was “marked by an ostentatious contempt for ease, wealth, and the enjoyments of life.” Diogenes would have had a field day skewering the consumerism and materialism in modern day America. One of the things that I love about Diogenes is his moniker. The irascible philosopher was known as Diogenes the Cynic. What a great name! How cool would that be to have a title like that? It certainly is better than Diogenes of Sinope. I would gladly swap Dave of Garland for Dave the Self-Deprecating as my appellation any day.

It’s a little late for me…

Recently my bride and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. I wish I could say it has been 30 years of wine and roses. Or,  for my legalistic friends, 30 years of Welch’s and practical cut flowers. But it has not always been easy. Neither one of us came into this little nuptial adventure with any idea of what we were doing. So I was a little disturbed to pick up a publication today that would have told me everything that women wished that men knew. How helpful that little bit of info would have been in 1976 instead of 2006. But I decided to proceed to see if I had figured anything out on my own.

The survey was a joint effort of Woman’s Day Magazine and AOL. The title of the article is “What we wish men knew”. Here are some of the findings with my totally objective self-evaluation of my beginning marriage grade and current grade.

Anyone can grow weeds…

This has been a hot Texas summer. Even by Texas standards this has been a scorching July. How hot has it been? Thank you for asking.

  • The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground
  • Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs.
  • The cows are giving evaporated milk.
  • The trees are whistling for the dogs.
  • You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.

A question I can’t dodge

My wife has many endearing qualities. But she has one trait that is really annoying. She has a amazingly fine tuned balderdash detector. I toyed with other words to title her detector but decided that even a Bad Christian should show some decorum now and then. Her gift is a problem for me. I am a world class vendor of “balderdash”. So occasionally I find myself in an uncomfortable moment. One of those moments that I used to hate was when Joni would ask me this question.

“What is God teaching you?”

Perfect Cyber Storm hits Bad Christian

Regular readers of these ramblings have been contacting me this week. Thousands of irate viewers…uhh…make that hundreds….okay….seven people have written to ask what is going on? “Why I have been *&*#$^ banned from your website?” asked one reader who represents the demographic I reach. For a week I received the same message that all of you read.

“You (Bad Christian) are not authorized to view this (your very own site) website. Contact the webmaster if you think this is in error.”

And therein was the problem.

In our last episode

The website went down a week ago and we have been unable to keep you updated via this site. So much has happened that I decided to put this update in the form of an old movie serial…

First of all we must update you on the previous episodes.

When last we left you we were poring over Joni’s white blood cell count after the last round of the very difficult A/C chemotherapy.


The counts were low but good enough for us to venture on a little R&R adventure to a lake cabin in Arkansas. We left on July 10th and headed to the hills of Ouchita National Forest.

Panic at 36,000 feet

I am taking a week off to spend with my bride. I am posting “gently read” articles from the very early days of this blog. Some of these posts are like new…only read by little old ladies on Sunday afternoons. Seriously, many of you missed these offerings. I hope you find something to enjoy.




First I must apologize to the three or four readers who eagerly show up each weekday to read these ramblings. I was stuck on the road with a defective power pack and no other computer access. So I have to admit that I “blogged” down for a couple of days. Sorry. I am now powered up and ready to ramble.