Never forget who you are…and were

The lovely Mrs. Burchett and I recently had the joy of watching Ricky Skaggs and Kentucky Thunder in concert. I have decided that if am ever unresponsive you can check my heart status by putting a Ricky Skaggs CD on the stereo. If my toe doesn’t start tapping I am likely flat-lined. You just can’t help responding if you have a pulse. I left the concert and waded through Skagg’s discography. One song brought back memories of something my Mom always said to me. The song that jogged that recollection was called Don’t Get Above Your Raisin’. Now lookee here gal don’t ya’ high hat me,I ain’t forgot what you used ta beWhen you didn’t have nuthin,That was plain ta’ see.Don’t get above your raisin’Stay down ta’ earth with me. Mom was raised as a farm girl in Kentucky and she was fiercely proud of that. So anytime she perceived that I was getting a bit uppity and full of myself she would
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Time to run a hypocrite scan….

I am embracing my new found role of grumpy old man. I suspect others have viewed me as a grumpy old man for some time but I am just getting around to embracing it. I am on the record as a huge fan of the Muppets. Two very underrated characters were Statler and Waldorf, the two grumpy old guys who sat in the balcony and criticized the show every week. I loved those guys. Here is a sampling of the sarcastic stylings of Statler and Waldorf. Statler:  What would you do if you were a rich man?Waldorf:  I’d buy the network and cancel this show! Statler: Wake up you old fool. You slept through the show.Waldorf: Who’s a fool? You watched it. Statler: I wonder if there really is life on another planet?Waldorf: Why do you care? You don’t have a life on this one! Okay, I will concede that the Muppet faces and voices made the lines funnier. I am
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Starbucks brewing anti-God sentiments?

I am on record concerning my affection for coffee. Affection just sounds so much better than addiction. The truth is that when the Betty Ford Center opens the Java Wing I will be a candidate to cut the ribbon. So it is no surprise that I have frequented a Starbucks location or two over the years. A recent headline caught my eye concerning anti-God statements from the Seattle coffee giant. Let’s pick up the story from the Dayton Daily News. Michelle Incanno was an admitted Starbucks addict. She’d buy the company’s coffee beans every week. Whenever she’d get the chance to drop by a Starbucks, she would, placing the same order every time: a large, house brewed coffee with nonfat milk and two Splenda. That was until she got an unexpected jolt last week from her coffee cup. Printed on the cup was: “Why in moments of crisis do we ask God for strength and help? As cognitive beings, why would
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Christopher Hitchens finds surprising support from Jesus of Nazareth

Christopher Hitchens is an erudite and witty writer. I am usually challenged by his insights and I suspect that his brain is much larger than mine. So it is with a bit of reticence that I address his new book, God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything. Regular readers of these humble ramblings know that I totally disagree with Hitchen’s premise that God is not great. But I did tease in the title of this piece that Hitchen’s has a most unlikely supporter for his claim that religion poisons everything. That supporters name is Jesus. Jesus made more than a few enemies by pointing out that religion does poison the true message of God. Religion binds people in hopeless legalism. Religion controls with shock collars of fear and guilt. Jesus hated religion. Exhibit A comes from the Gospel of Matthew. Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples, “The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the law of Moses. So practice
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What Would Jesus Say?

A local church is doing a sermon series involving what Jesus would say to various celebrities. The signboard asks the question, What would Jesus say to…. Alec Baldwin. Tom Cruise. Rosie O’Donnell. Bono. I wondered what I would say to each of those famous or infamous people. In my fantasy world I would say something like this… Alec Baldwin – Don’t misplace your anger. Tom Cruise – You might want to rethink the medication thing. Rosie O’Donnell – Remember when you were funny? Bono – You rock. In the real world I would likely not say any of those things except maybe the “you rock” to Bono. But I was wondering if what Jesus would say to a celebrity is the right question to ask? I am pretty good at figuring out what Jesus would say to others. I have an amazing ability to hear a sermon and wonder if Congregant A is hearing this? Or to shake my head and think,
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Billy the Big Mouth Bass was right!

Several years ago there was an odd downturn in the culture that made mounted singing bass a must have item. The novelty item was known as “Billy Bass the Singing Fish”. Billy was motion activated and every time someone walked by you got to hear one of his very limited two song set. To be fair, that is pretty impressive for a fish. One of Billy’s greatest hits was a song made famous by singer Bobby McFerren. Billy Bass would flop and flap his gills while singing the lyrics to “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”. Little did I realize that Billy had stumbled onto an important truth. We should not worry because it only makes things worse. Here is a little song I wrote You might want to sing it note for note Don’t worry be happy In every life we have some trouble When you worry you make it double Don’t worry, be happy…… A story in the Health section of the Dallas Morning
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