Charisa Stories

Category: Uncategorized

  • Is Performing the Best Path to Spiritual Growth?

    I learned growing up in a legalistic church that my eternal destiny was determined to a large extent by my performance. I had to be good. I had to do my part. The performance message was reinforced all around me in church and in life.

    If you eat your vegetables you can have dessert.
    If you are good you get toys at Christmas.
    If you get all A’s you will get a monetary reward.
    If you behave your parents will be proud of you.

    So I learned to perform to get rewards and affirmation. Performance addiction is easy in legalism because you always have someone willing (and extremely happy) to challenge how well you are doing and where you can improve. So I performed. I tried hard. Then harder. Like most performance addicts I got tired and sad and desperate. I was on the verge of accepting that this journey with Jesus is a lot of begrudging compliance. The supposed joy that I was promised was hard to find. Then something hit my heart and mind.

    Grace.

    I heard a message that I had probably heard before but my heart was prepared this time for the seed of freedom to flourish.

    Grace.

    I finally realized there is nothing I can personally do to improve my eternal odds. The work of Jesus on the Cross is finished. I am forgiven. The Biblical texts on forgiveness are past tense.

    Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32, NLT

    You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for He forgave all our sins. Colossians 2:13

    I am writing to you who are God’s children because your sins have been forgiven through Jesus. 1 John 2:12

    Jesus died for past, present and future sins. I used to agonize over unconfessed sin. What if I forgot something? What if I was unaware of some sin? What if I died with unresolved sin? I made it so hard when all along the eternally patient voice of Jesus was saying relax.
    “It is finished.”
    “My work on the Cross is complete and forever.”
    “You are forgiven once and for all.”

    I contribute nothing to that except my need for a Savior because of my sin.

    The uniqueness of grace for a follower of Christ is that God already knows everything about me (and you) and He loves us exactly the same on our best or worst day. Don’t rush past that truth for Christians.

    Read it again.

    God knows everything about you, and He loves you exactly the same on your best or worst day.

    I don’t have to fight a battle that has already been won. I can relax in the finished work of Christ.

    The answer to performance addiction can be found in two simple words.

    Jesus. Grace.

    Two more words come to mind every time I think of that gift.

    Praise God!

    When I realize all that I was given when I trusted Jesus as my Savior my entire attitude about serving Him changed. Remember that begrudging obligation I mentioned earlier? Now I serve Jesus out of profound gratitude. God will accomplish His plan on this earth whether I am willing or unwilling to serve Him. But what a joy it is to acknowledge the love and grace of God by willingly seeking to be a part of His plan. That approach to glorify God because of what Jesus did for you completely changes your motivation in the most wonderful way. I don’t have to work my way into His favor like I used to believe. I am already there because of Jesus.

    God loves me. I am His child forever. He sent His Son to save me. He gifted me with the Holy Spirit to guide and comfort me. I am actually righteous in the Father’s eyes because of Jesus. Are you telling me those truths don’t change your motivation to want to perform for Jesus? That recognition changed my world completely. Now I want to perform for Him out of love for the eternal hope I now possess.

  • How Fiery Trials Make You Stronger

    My lovely wife loves pottery, so one of my “sacrificial” ways to love Joni is to accompany her to pottery shops. Guys refer to that as “hitting behind the runner” or “taking the charge.” Once we visited a shop where the artisans were making vases and pots right before our eyes, surrounded by shelves of the colorful, beautiful, and functional finished products.

    While Joni looked around, I watched a potter take a nondescript lump of clay and skillfully make a unique creation. This verse from Isaiah came to mind.

    O Lord, you are our Father.
    We are the clay, and you are the potter.
    We all are formed by your hand.  (Isaiah 64:8)

    I was fascinated by the complexity of the process. The potter must make sure that no dirt or impurities are in the clay. These unwanted materials will make the pot weak and unusable for its intended purpose. God desires to do the same with us. Impurities (sin) weaken us and keep us from our intended purpose.

    The potter kneads the clay to ensure that there are no air bubbles, otherwise the pot might crack when fired in the kiln. In my life, my “air bubbles” are pockets of resistance when I decide I must control my destiny instead of trusting God. I can appear to be molded and conformed to God’s image, but I have unseen “bubbles” of pride and anger and control. These self-generated bubbles can cause me to crack under the heat of adversity.

    The metaphors that Scripture uses are so powerful when we take the time to understand context and culture. The newly formed pottery, called “greenware,” is carefully placed on a shelf to air-dry before the next step. It is brittle and easily broken. Something else needs to happen to permanently set the object’s shape and make it strong and usable. The clay must endure the fire of the kiln.

    Trials by fire can have that same effect on us as followers of Jesus. Trials can make us stronger and set our shape as His followers. Or, if we are unprepared, the fire of life’s trials can cause us to crack and make us useless for His plan.

    I can choose to be content in my “greenware” state, brittle and useless for service. But God knows that it is in the trials of fire that we are strengthened and most effective. It is nearly always in that uncomfortable adversity that the true beauty of our creative process is revealed. I cannot think of an instance of significant growth in my life that has happened without the refining heat of trials.

    There are a couple of huge differences between the earthly potter and God as the Potter. When the earthly potter finds a bad piece of clay, he discards it. Our heavenly Potter patiently works with us even when we seem misshapen and worthless. A shattered piece of pottery is often thrown out. But our heavenly Father can take the shards of our brokenness and reshape us into something beautiful and effective for Him.

    The words of the apostle James make more sense in the context of the Potter’s process.

    Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. (James 1:2-3, NIV)

    There is no joy in the trial, but there is joy in the knowledge of how God uses such events in our lives. If you are in the midst of a trial or about to face a trial, take comfort that God desires for you to emerge strengthened and beautiful and useful. One potter said that the greatest thing about making pots is that each lump of clay has near-infinite potential. The lump of clay that is me and the lump of clay that is you have infinite potential because we have an infinite God who is patient and good. We should not fear or run from fiery trials. What happens when we endure them while trusting God is worth the cost.

    An excerpt from Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace. Check it out here.

  • How to Choose Hope and Light over Doom and Darkness

    I remember reading Chicken Little when I was a child. The story tells about a young chick walking along that is unexpectedly struck on the head by an acorn. With no further investigation Chicken Little came to the kind of conclusion that floods our social media today.

    The sky is falling!

    Today Chicken Little would be an excellent politician or cable news anchor. Every time I violate my own personal mental health policy and turn on the news I am plunged into despair. 

    The sky is falling! Look! There is an expert displaying a colorful chart to prove it! Hear me out. I know it is important to communicate information for our actions and safety. But the tone and sheer volume of fear mongering is depressing.

    When I fall totally into the abyss and survey social media I see overwhelming fear, anger, gloom, and apocalyptic doom. Again, I understand the need to be informed. But I am beginning to think that fear is the most consistent ingredient for way too many sources.

    As a follower of Jesus how do I process this tsunami of doom? I need to remind myself of some fundamental truths that I hold true. I find myself doing this over and over because the noise from the culture can drown out the quiet voice of the Spirit of God. Here is a small dose of my faith vaccine for fear.

    These events are NOT a surprise to God. Violence, hatred, bigotry, and division are a product of a fallen world that will someday be redeemed. Jesus made it very clear that following Him is not a get out of grief card. 

    “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33, NLT)

    Yes, there will be troubles but He has overcome the world. What does that mean?

    It means even in my deepest fear and darkest hour I know that I am loved, adopted, redeemed, and I have the promise of eternity with God. I have hope to sustain me. I am not anxious to leave this world but I am also not afraid. I believe I have an eternal inheritance given as a free gift of grace awaiting me.

    I do my best to obey the laws the authorities lay out for me. I try to be a good neighbor and a responsible citizen. After doing all of those important things I stand on this conclusion drawn by David when he was afraid for his future. His lament sounds like he could have written it today (after watching cable news).

    My heart is breaking
        as I remember how it used to be:
    I walked among the crowds of worshipers,
        leading a great procession to the house of God,
    singing for joy and giving thanks
        amid the sound of a great celebration!

    David was isolated. His days of joyful gatherings were just a memory as he hunkered down alone in fear. But he remembered the key to his joy and thankfulness. He remembered where he placed his hope.

    Why am I discouraged?
        Why is my heart so sad?
    I will put my hope in God!
        I will praise him again—
        my Savior and my God!

    In Psalm 73 the author laments how the wicked seem to prosper and he wonders if his efforts are in vain. Then he recognizes the problem is not the world but the bitterness in his own heart. He acknowledges that he may face troubles but his source of strength is eternal.

    My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
        but God remains the strength of my heart;
        he is mine forever. (Psalm 73:26, NLT)

    The next time the news or a social media influencer is causing your heart to be downcast remember the words of Paul to the church at Corinth.

    “For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” 
    (2 Corinthians 4:17-18, NLT)

    Today I choose to focus my gaze on the source of hope and light. 

    Jesus. 

    Fear causes you to take your eye off of the source of your strength. Keep your eyes on Jesus and the words of a classic old church hymn will begin to ring true in your heart.

    O soul are you weary and troubled?
    No light in the darkness you see?
    There’s light for a look at the Savior
    And life more abundant and free

    Turn you eyes upon Jesus
    Look full in His wonderful face.
    And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
    In the light of His glory and grace.

    I pray that you will choose to focus on the hope and light of Jesus to get you through the cacophony of doom and gloom that surrounds us.

  • Want to Represent Your Faith Effectively?

    Regular consumers of my humble ramblings (bless your hearts) know that I often find spiritual application from song lyrics both secular and sacred. Blame it on faulty brain wiring at the factory. This week I heard a snippet from Carly Simon’s haunting ballad “That’s The Way I’ve Always Heard It Should Be” that triggered today’s musing. The song talks about the ideal of marriage. Her partner wants to marry and is convinced their union will make their relationship different. The lyrical response hit my heart.

    You say we can keep our love alive
    Babe – all I know is what I see –

    She had seen too many marriages start with fairy tale dreams and end in sorrow. That sad topic is another blog. What hit me on this day was how that principle of believing only what you see is how we, as followers of Jesus, can impact non-believers. We tell people we have good news. We tell people we have an eternal hope. We tell people they need this Jesus we talk about. But what hurts my heart is that too many people echo Carly Simon’s response.

    All I know is what I see

    I began my book When Bad Christians Happen to Good People with this quote from Brennan Manning.

    “The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips and walk out the door and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.”

    Ouch.

    If my friends, family, and workmates don’t see anything different in my life then why should they listen? Wait..don’t leave me yet! I am not talking about legalistic sin management and self-righteous “good” behavior. I am talking about unvarnished honesty about the radical grace of Jesus. What if I lived that kind of grace?

    What if I showed them grace that frees me to admit my shortcomings without shame and self-loathing? What if I demonstrated  grace that gives me the courage to be vulnerable and let them see who I really am? What if I let them know I am a total train wreck that needs that grace every moment of everyday? What if I lived out of grace that compels me to run to hurting souls instead of retreating to a safe distance to observe and hope it all works out okay?

    What if I quit agonizing about the uncertainty in the world and started sharing my belief that God is in control and He will always be with me? What if I genuinely showed gratitude for the small things as well as the big ones? What if I was consistently kind even when that action was inconvenient? What if I led instead of lamented about racial and other injustices? What if I acknowledged how much Jesus loves me by allowing that love to flow to others? What if I shared that this relationship with Jesus isn’t based on performance or merit but 100 percent on His unmerited Grace? What if I lived like God loves me on my worst day exactly the same as He loves me on my best day? What if I had this honest passage from Paul memorized and remembered it on the way out the door everyday?

    “Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!”
    ‭‭Romans‬ ‭12‬:‭9‬-‭16‬ ‭NLT‬‬

    Famous theologian D.L.Moody wrote that “Out of 100 men, one will read the Bible, the other 99 will read the Christian.”

    That thought would be completely overwhelming if I tried to do it on my own. But thank God I don’t have to attempt that unassisted. Jesus promised to be with me and is there anyone better to have your back?

    Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. (Ephesians 3:17, NLT)

    If I believe that I would guess this little light of mine would burn a few watts brighter. And maybe some skeptics would be willing to listen.

  • Stop Broad Brushing if You Really Care About Others

    One of the things that I struggle with the most in our current cultural climate is the broad brushing by all sides. What do I mean by that?

    If you disagree with someone’s faith or political opinion you automatically assign to them the worst values from the most extreme people proclaiming that message. Without knowing a single thing about the person’s story, their heart, or their background we are prone to throw down the gauntlet of judgment. 

    A lot of Christians have been unfairly targeted recently. Some deserve to be called to accountability. I have never had a problem with being honest about how I and many other followers of Jesus often fall short of representing the grace and love of Jesus. 

    That is just a fact. That doesn’t change who Jesus is.

    But one heartbreaking result is that the entire Christian faith is being dismissed and denigrated by a lot of people with social media influence. 

    With just a bit of internet searching I can find example after example of failed followers of Jesus. What is more challenging to find are stories about the millions who serve selflessly every day and without being noticed. Why do so many people sacrifice willingly to help those who give them very little or even nothing in return? 

    I know a standard answer is indoctrination as a child into this phony faith. That didn’t happen to me. I was not raised in the church as a child or brainwashed to believe. Another accusation is there is blind acceptance of faith without questioning. That is not my story either. I did a deep dive into my faith when I experienced doubts. I needed to see if I could stand firmly on what I believed. I can tell you there is intellectual depth in the Christian community that helped me sort through my questions with clarity and confidence. 

    I will be honest and tell you it is hard to read some of the comments that strangers have made about my faith. It is harder still to read and hear them from people I know. But that is the reality of the spiritual battle that all followers of Jesus face. 

    If it is true that there is an enemy who tries to destroy the claims of Christ then it makes total sense that the narrative he would push forward is entirely negative. The Enemy does not want the millions of stories of people making a difference capturing the limelight. That would illuminate the darkness of this fallen world with the hope of Jesus.

    So what should be our response to these attacks? Jesus made our response pretty clear.

    43 “You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. 44 But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! 45 In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. 46 If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. 47 If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even unbelievers do that.” (Matthew 5:43-47, NLT)

    When you have the opportunity to talk to someone who opposes your faith you should ask to hear their story. Why do they have such strong feelings against God? Did something or someone cause that reaction? 

    It is amazing how hearing someone’s story can often soften your heart toward them. You have a much better understanding of why they react the way they do. And listening (really listening) can open a door to dialogue about your own journey and story. You will be acting as a true child of God.

    Occasionally I hear some kind things directed toward me. I am grateful for that but here is my honest response to those words. I might have some basic personality traits that were positive but I can say with 100% conviction that most of the things you like about me were cultivated, refined, and grown through the love of Jesus and the gentle teaching power of the Holy Spirit. 

    Own your failures. We all fall short. I am careful not to communicate that my desire is for an unbeliever to stop living in a particular way or to quit a sin I abhor. My message is to really get to know Jesus. In the movie the Jesus Revolution a church welcomed in young men and women who were doing drugs and living a life that many in the congregation deemed decadent. If the message had been clean up your life and then you can be part of our community the revival would have stopped cold. Instead the message was come to know Jesus and let Him show you how to change how you live. That happened millions of times during that remarkable revival. 

    It can still happen today. But I fear that God can not use me if I am busy broad brushing everyone I disagree with. I want to share His story without judging theirs. I am throwing away the broad brush. Will you join me?

  • Don’t Fool Yourself. Everybody Serves Somebody or Something.

    Bob Dylan wrote some powerful songs about his faith journey in the late 70’s. One song he composed popped up on the music feed recently. “Gotta Serve Somebody” simply says that no matter how independent or in control we might try to be we still serve something or somebody.

    But you’re gonna have to serve somebody, yes indeed
    You’re gonna have to serve somebody
    Well, it may be the devil or it may be the Lord
    But you’re gonna have to serve somebody

    I used to think I was self-sufficient but I was fooling myself. My self-image centered on my job or my social or political beliefs. Those weren’t bad things in my estimation. That lyric struck a spiritual chord because it reminded me of a thought provoking definition of idolatry from author Tim Keller that we can substitute even good things for God.

    “Sin is building your life and meaning on anything, even a very good thing, more than on God. Whatever we build our life on will drive us and enslave us. Sin is primarily idolatry.”

    That is disturbing for a guy who was taught from childhood that sin was simply a legalistic check list that validated my righteousness. That list contained but was not limited to R- rated movies, liquor, cigarettes, dancing, long hair, and rock and roll. I thought I was doing pretty well on the idolatry commandment until I encountered that explanation.

    Tim Keller’s definition of idolatry takes all of the fun out of self-righteous comparison and judging of others.

    Here is another toe-stomper from Tim Keller. “If our identity is in our work, rather than Christ, success will go to our heads, and failure will go to our hearts.”

    Who I am serving today and where I place my identity will define my actions and reactions.

    My worth is not in always being right or being the smartest guy in the room. My worth is defined by being a child of God and a friend of Jesus. When I keep my eyes on Jesus, I maintain a better perspective on every area of my life.

    It is a hard truth to admit that we often worship the things of this world because they really can be good things. God in His loving grace does not desire for us to be deprived of good and pleasurable things. He simply wants us to place them in proper order and to understand they are sources of happiness and not the source of joy. Later in the passage Paul gives one key to avoiding idolatry and where our identity should be found.

    Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like Him. In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and He lives in all of us. (Colossians 3:10-11, NLT)

    Your assignment is to take a moment to read verses Colossians 3:12-17 to see what the results of this action might look like. There will not be a quiz.

    Another key is to remember a campfire song from the Jesus movement that was, to borrow the approach of Law and Order, “ripped” from the Gospel of Matthew. (Matthew 6:33)

    Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness;
    and all these things shall be added unto you.
    Allelu, alleluia

    Everybody is going to serve somebody or something. Who (or what) are you centering your life on today? I choose today and everyday to serve Jesus.

  • How Can A Loving Grandparent Make an Eternal Impact?

    Years ago Joni and I were part of a small church group that met regularly and during one session we asked everyone this question.

    What person had the biggest impact on you spiritually growing up?

    Three-quarters of our group shared the same answer.

    A grandparent.

    I was one of those who gave that response. My life was impacted then and to this day by my dear Granny Davis. She had taken on the name Davis from her second husband Raymond.

    Talitha Alice Burchett remarried a few years after enduring the unthinkable tragedy of losing her first husband to typhoid fever when my dad was only six-months-old. A widow with a newborn living in dirt poor Appalachia would have reason to be bitter. But not this remarkable woman.

    So many words come to mind as I remember Granny Davis. The first word is always gratitude. Anytime I visited she was grateful for one minute of my time or for many hours. She was grateful for everything and everyone.

    Another word is joy. Granny Davis had a ready and sometimes mischievous smile that cheered me constantly through the trials of growing up. She was my champion and she never once showed disappointment in me.

    She had almost no formal education yet she was one of the wisest women I have ever known.  Perhaps that is because she spent so much time absorbing God’s Word through consistent reading of the Bible. I remember her lamenting that she wished she was smarter so she could understand the words better. But few people I have met have allowed God’s Word to penetrate their heart and actions more than my Granny Davis. I bought her a copy of The Living Bible and she read through it with notes and marks from Genesis to Revelation. On August 26, 1977 she wrote this at the end of the book of Revelation.

    “Just finished reading this through. Thank you David. It’s meant a lot to me.”

    She was my first messenger of grace, although I did not realize that until later in life. She modeled unconditional love through some very difficult seasons with my parent’s marriage. No matter how I responded during that time I never once felt guilty or unloved in her presence. That was grace in real life.

    To this day, I think of her grace filled responses whenever I feel ungrateful for some real or perceived slight. When I got my driver’s license, my visits to Granny Davis’s house became more and more unannounced. I would run there when I was sad or afraid. She was my refuge. In her presence, I experienced unconditional love, more than in any other place in my early life.

    Granny Davis earned extra money by taking on sewing projects. Joni and I often tell the story of how desperately poor we were when we were newlyweds and our firstborn son Matt came along. There were many times when we scavenged for coins to scrape together money for milk. Whenever we were most in need, a letter would arrive postmarked “Chillicothe, Ohio.” In her distinctive scribble, Granny Davis would write a note of encouragement to us, accompanied by money from her sewing projects. Whether it was five dollars or twenty, it always seemed to be just what we needed to get by for that moment.

    That was no accident. This was a woman who was dialed into the Holy Spirit, and she demonstrated that God knows our needs and He moves before we have any idea. It gave Joni and me a very early and unforgettable example of how God provides. We have never forgotten that lesson. When we face uncertainty, we know that He provides, in part because of a five-foot-two dynamo of faith who showed us what faith and grace look like in our daily journey.

    Isn’t it interesting how a simple person of faith, kindness, joy, and grace can have such an influence? She knows I loved her but she had no idea how much her walk with Jesus affected me. Part of that is because I didn’t recognize it myself until later in life and I can’t wait to tell her in heaven some day.

    Proverbs 17:6 says that “Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged”.

    Amen.

    What a wonderful gift from God to have the opportunity to love, care, and share your life with these precious little ones. We can have a unique connection and voice to our grandkids. I share the hope of John who wrote these words.

    I could have no greater joy than to hear that my children (and grandchildren) are following the truth. (3 John 3:4, NLT)

    I hope I am having an impact in my beloved grandkids lives. I won’t know the whole story on this earth but I will do my best to show them the love and grace of Jesus.

    Billy Graham summed up my goal perfectly.

    “The greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.”