Category: Uncategorized

Summer has made it’s presence known this week in Texas. The oppressive heat leads to scenes like this for the canine friend Maggie.

For years I have been throwing around the phrase “dog days of summer” with no clue about its origin. The Romans noticed that the hottest days of the years happened to coincide with the appearance of the “dog star” Sirius which is the brightest star in the constellation Canis Major. They believed the appearance of this bright star contributed to withering heat.

The Greeks were likely the first to use the term dog days and you will surely recall this reference from your most recent reading of the Iliad by Homer.

Sirius rises late in the dark, liquid sky
On summer nights, star of stars,
Orion’s Dog they call it, brightest
Of all, but an evil portent, bringing heat
And fevers to suffering humanity.

One of the problems with our cultural Christianity is that we too often confuse giftedness and godliness. Someone may be gifted at speaking or writing or singing and we elevate that person in our spiritual estimation. God uses gifted people to be sure. But I am learning that God can use regular people reflecting Jesus through trials and suffering in miraculous ways.

These heroes of the faith generally don’t make headlines. What they make is much more important. They make a difference.

Our friends Debbie and Jim Dixon have made a difference in our lives. Two years ago our non-smoking friend Debbie was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer. I don’t think the cancer realized what a tenacious foe it had attacked. Debbie has unleashed every single thing she has in her battle with this terrible disease. She has suffered a heartbreaking litany of side effects and setbacks in her long struggle. I think I might well have conceded after going through about half of what she has endured. But not my friend Debbie.

She has never wavered in her desire to live every moment that God would grant her to live. Debbie and her sweet husband Jim have faced this horrible season with resolute faith, love and grace. When Joni and I go to “cheer them up” we leave encouraged and inspired by our friends. Of course there are tears and sadness in such a tough journey. But their hope and peace is remarkable. It comes from their faith in a God who never leaves them even when others might suggest He has. Paul Tripp says it well. “In moments of suffering, biblical faith never requires you to deny reality. Biblical faith allows you to stare the harshest of realities in the face with honesty, hope, and courage.”

That is what Debbie and Jim have shown me. In the midst of the darkest valley they are a beacon that shows that my faith is not only real…it works at the most difficult times. How can you endure such a trial? Paul begged for a trial to be taken away and received this response.

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

It cannot be explained how the Holy Spirit comforts and sustains you in those trials. Joni and I have experienced it through the death of our daughter and through our family cancer journeys. I have recently seen that strength in the lives of my friends. I am grateful that I have had the privilege of sharing my life with these special followers of Christ. I hope that I will pass the future tests and trials of life as well as they have modeled it for me.

Debbie would be the first to ask for a shout out for her beloved Jim. I know he had to have been discouraged but I have never heard Jim complain. He has never griped about the tough hand that he and Debbie have been dealt. Together they trusted God in every moment.

I had always wondered exactly what Paul meant in Ephesians when he wrote that husbands are to love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. I thought it was a lovely little metaphor and a nice goal to shoot for but I did not believe it to be possible. Jim messed up the curve for all of us. I have seen a working model of how a husband can love his wife like Christ loved the church.

Today I listened to a song by one of my go to guys when I need some musical comfort. Andrew Peterson has a song called Lay Me Down. In this song Peterson sings about how his final resting place could be anywhere because something else will happen when you lay him down to die. Here are the lyrics from this awesome song.

When you lay me down to die
So long, boys, so long, girls
Lay me down and let me say goodbye to this world
You can lay me anywhere
But just remember this
When you lay me down to die
You lay me down to live.

That is exactly what my friend Debbie believes. Debbie knows that when God ordains that moment she will not be laying down not to die…but to live. It will be hard to say goodbye to her devoted husband Jim, her family and her friends. I know that Debbie and Jim also believe the next part of Andrew Peterson’s lyric.

I’ll open up my eyes on the skies I’ve never known
In the place where I belong
And I’ll realize His love is just another word for Home.

All of us will be facing the journey home someday. None of us escapes this life unscathed by pain and suffering. I am grateful today for the hope of a joyful reunion with so many family and friends. And I especially grateful that I believe the words written by Paul in his letter to the Romans.

Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later.

I cling to that hope today.

There have been a lot of dire statements over the past few days about the future of Christianity in America. Some have declared that America will be judged harshly by God after the recent events. I am not smart enough or holy enough to know how or why God will judge America. I remember in Genesis when God mercifully offered to withdraw judgement if a handful of righteous people could be found in Sodom.  Abraham started by pleading for the city if fifty righteous people could be found. He eventually asked for mercy if only ten righteous could be found and the Lord agreed. You know the rest of the story. There were not ten righteous people to be found in that city of debauchery. I am pretty sure there is a far bigger number of sincere followers of Jesus in our country than that. So I don’t know how God is going to proceed. Maybe we needed a wake-up call to get off, as one old pastor colorfully called it, “our blessed assurance”.

Others are proclaiming America to be post-Christian and perhaps even celebrating the trend. I wonder if a paraphrase from Mark Twain might not be in order here. “The death of Christianity has been greatly exaggerated”. To be sure the cultural dominance of Christianity has been deeply wounded. That did not happen in the last month. That has been slipping away for years. But that may not be such a bad thing. Christianity always seems to be more effective when playing as an underdog.

My friend Ed Underwood put our current cultural status in wise perspective in his excellent blog.

First Century Christians didn’t think in terms of getting their way in the courts and power centers of the Empire. They thought in terms of survival for another day to serve Jesus in a broken world. As house churches erupted in an affluent but cruel and decadent empire society turned on them with murderous rage. When the message of forgiveness transformed their lives the gospel awakened a radical sense of cultural compassion. Unwilling to participate in unjust power structures and cultic worship of the emperor, believers stood alone and without political shelter. Peter and Paul were martyred under Nero (54-68) and John exiled under Domitian (81-98). To claim the name of Christ in those simple times was to invite vicious, unrelenting persecution.

Nevertheless, they gathered in the name of Jesus and worshiped him by living lives that portrayed the Savior’s message of forgiveness, love, and justice.

And that ragamuffin group of people changed the world by loving and serving selflessly and fearlessly. The early church had no chance to “win” the culture war. Instead they built a community of believers that infiltrated the culture.

To be completely honest I am concerned about our country and it goes way beyond the most current news. But I am not worried about the church and God’s plan. Both will prevail. God said these words to Peter in the Gospel of Matthew.

“I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.”  (Matthew 16:18, ESV)

So I feel pretty confident that the media, the government and the culture will not prevent God from accomplishing His purpose. I have recently been meditating on a verse from Psalm 16.

Preserve me, O God, for in you I take refuge.
I say to the Lord, “You are my Lord;
    I have no good apart from you.”  (Psalm 16:1-2, ESV)

I love the fresh take on this passage in The Message.

Keep me safe, O God,
    I’ve run for dear life to you.
I say to God, “Be my Lord!”
    Without you, nothing makes sense.

That is my meditation for this week.

Be my Lord for without You nothing makes sense.

Nothing has changed in the Sovereignty and Holiness of God in the past month. Nothing. So I am not afraid. If fact, I am excited to see what God will do now that many of us have shifted our focus back to where it should have been all along. On a God who is loving, holy and sovereign and still very much in the business of accomplishing His eternal plan.

Occasionally people will observe our three wonderful sons and ask something like this. “What did you do to parent such great kids?” My response is simple. “I married Joni. The rest is a blur.” There is a little too much truth in that answer. She was and is remarkable. But we did partner in this grand adventure called parenting. Along the way I learned some things mostly by error and stumbling trial. Over the next two days I will share what I have figured out with the disclaimer that I do not claim to be an expert. It is with humility and grateful appreciation to God that He has given me the gift of this family.

One thing I have learned in my journey is that every dad leaves a legacy. The only question is whether that legacy will be good, bad, or indifferent. Being a father is tough because we generally learn how to parent while on the job.

Ken Druck and James Simmons in The Secrets Men Keep discuss six major secrets men have. At the top of the list is that “men secretly yearn for their fathers love and approval.” This is often without their conscious knowledge that this yearning manifests itself in the drive that many males have to prove themselves. The authors say:

It may surprise us to know that the most powerful common denominator influencing men’s lives today is the relationship we had with our fathers …. Of the hundreds of men I have surveyed over the years, perhaps 90 percent admitted they still had strings leading back to their fathers. In other words, they are still looking to their fathers, even though their fathers may have been dead for years, for approval, acceptance, affection, and understanding.

This series is not about being a perfect dad. If it were, I would be completely unqualified to write it. This series is not about piling guilt on you for mistakes made. I am not looking for the result like the boy who said to his preacher on the way out, “Boy, that was a good sermon. My dad slumped way down today.” This series is seeing what God’s plan is for leaving a positive legacy as an earthly father.

The first way to leave a good legacy is found in Paul’s letter to the church at Ephesus.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (NIV, Ephesians 5:25) The translation in The Message says this.

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church–a love marked by giving, not getting.

The number one way to leave a great legacy for your children is very simple:

Love your wife.

If you are already 0 for 1…or 0 for 2…hang with me. God is a God of grace and compassion. We will see how He can work even when the ideal is no longer possible in upcoming posts.

The idea of marriage as an absolute commitment is an endangered species. Actor Brad Pitt has confessed he knew his marriage to Jennifer Aniston would never last. He said in a recent interview that he never expected to be wed forever. He described his high-profile breakup as “beautiful.” Pitt seemed frustrated about the public perception… “It’s talked about like it failed. I guess because it wasn’t flawless.” Now comes Pitt’s wisdom about marriage: “Me, I embrace the messiness of life. I find it so beautiful, actually. The idea that marriage has to be for all time – that I don’t understand.”

Our culture has devalued marriage to the point where far too many people enter relationships on a trial basis with no expectation that it can last. I will guarantee you one thing…that mindset will make it much more likely that it will not last. Had Joni and I shared that value we would be a stat and our children would be from a divided home. Why should followers of Jesus believe that marriage is for all time? A report by Warren Mueller revealed that where both parents attend church regularly, 72% of their children continue in the faith. Where only the father attends, that percentage drops to 55 percent, but where only the mother attends, just 15 percent of the children remain involved in the church.

Theodore M. Hesburgh wrote that the “most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother”.

Your children watch how you treat their mother. They watch … and they are learning and forming their concept of marriage from you. You are creating a pattern, a blueprint for marriage with your children. I struggled as a husband because I had not seen that blueprint in my parents’ marriage. My Dad was a good dad but my parents did not have a good marriage. Joni and I had to break the cycle because she also came from a difficult family situation. Because we broke the cycle our kids have seen a marriage that survived, and not only survived but is very happy. But we had to do a lot of learning on the job.

Part of my preparation for this series was a survey of my three sons. I asked my sons three questions and not one of them was “What is your quest”.

What were their favorite memories with me?
What did they learn from me as a dad?
And what do they wish I had done differently?

Yeah…that last question scared me for one major reason. My sons are truthful. But I figured if I had done something really wrong in their eyes I wanted to seek forgiveness now. Plus I would have a written document so if they turned up on Dr. Phil someday I could say I gave them a chance and they didn’t say anything. Seriously, I thought the exercise would make them consider how they could be better fathers someday…how they could break more cycles.

Our oldest son Matt wrote a little extra in his letter:

And thank you for being committed to Mom.  It is a rarity to have a family that is not broken.  But you gave up bigger things to make sure we stayed together and that has made all the difference.

I loved how The Message gives a fresh twist to Paul’s familiar words to the Ephesian Church.

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor—since they’re already “one” in marriage. (Ephesians 5:25, The Message)

If you are still able to control this one move it to the top of your list. The first step to leaving a good legacy as a dad is to love your wife!