Charisa Stories

Tag: cancel culture

  • How Would Jesus Confront the Cancel Mob?

    How Would Jesus Confront the Cancel Mob?

    Twitter makes cowards courageous and the anonymity of cyberspace can make the mean spirited downright evil. I have watched with sadness as Twitter tyrants have destroyed or severely damaged people and institutions. Sometimes the venom is directed at those who simply have a sincere difference of opinion on moral issues. And no event seems to generate more glee than a Christian leader or institution failing.

    Without fail the hypocrite word is used with smug satisfaction.

    And it is true. Let me make this personal since I can only speak honestly for me. I am a hypocrite. I do not consistently live up to the teachings of Jesus. I fail. I sin. That is why I need a Savior and not a self-help course. I am confident not in my holiness but in the holiness of Jesus. I remember hearing a pastor say that “we all sin and fall short of the glory of God. But that doesn’t keep us from comparing distances.”

    That is exactly what I used to do and still do when I forget why Jesus found it necessary to die for me!  I condemned without knowing anything about that person’s wounds or struggles. I would self-righteously note that at least I haven’t said something that offensive or done that bad thing! I am not as bad as them!

    So what?

    God’s Word says I am condemned when I judge, idolize, lie and covet without the redeeming grace of Jesus. It doesn’t matter whether it is less offensive than another person’s actions. Whether I fall a millimeter short or miles short is meaningless. I have fallen short. I am a desperate sinner in need of a Savior. Today I asked for the Holy Spirit to examine my heart. I am not responsible for the comments of others. I am accountable for my comments and thoughts before the One who went to the Cross to win my forgiveness.

    There is a familiar passage from the Gospel of John about a woman caught in sin. I wondered how Jesus might respond to today’s condemning cyber-mobs. Here is a modern social media version of this well known story.

    A crowd soon gathered, and He (Jesus) sat down and taught them. As He was speaking, the teachers of wokeness brought a woman who had been caught in the act of hateful speech. They put her in front of the crowd.

    “Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the very act of intolerant speech. We say she should be fired, disgraced, and shunned. What do you say?”

    They were trying to trap Him into saying something they could use against Him, but Jesus stooped down and looked at the device in His hand. They kept demanding an answer, so He typed a message that appeared on every device in the crowd simultaneously. They read the message on their screen.  “All right, but let the one who has never unfairly judged another and who has never said an ugly untruth about another send the first Tweet!” Then he looked down and typed something else.

    When the accusers read this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

    “No, Lord,” she said.

    And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Remember that every person is precious in My sight and that I loved them enough to endure the Cross. Go and sin no more.”

    Forgive me for taking liberties with such an amazing text. But I think it brings it home for us that I (and you) are often just like that mob who dragged the woman to Jesus.

    Lord Jesus,

    Forgive me for my judgment of others. Forgive me for my ugly thoughts. Forgive me for my sin of not defending others who are overlooked and oppressed. Forgive me for my mean comments about those you love dearly.  And thank you for still loving me in spite of the ugly reality of my own sin. I fall on your grace today. Please remind me to use these gifts of communication only to edify, encourage and inspire and to remember Paul’s words to the Colossians.

    Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. (Colossians 3:13-14, NLT)

    Thank you for loving me. Help me to love others in the power of Your Amazing Grace.

    Amen

    Waking Up Slowly is my personal journey to become more connected to God, others and myself. I would love for you to join me on this journey.

  • Can Followers of Jesus Disagree with Grace?

    Can Followers of Jesus Disagree with Grace?

    Recently I wrote that the lack of unity is the single biggest problem in the universal church and, of course, in our individual fellowships.

    After posting that article I received a note from high school friend Lona Jo Pierson Bowman. “I agree. Can you go on to describe what unity looks like when we sincerely disagree with each other?”

    Uhhhh….thanks a lot Lona! I have been wrestling with that homework assignment for a couple of weeks. I made a conscious decision a few years ago to focus on communicating the message of grace and identity in Christ. With that I decided to avoid the polarizing path of politics. Some have told me that is cowardly but I can honestly say there is no message more important to me than the liberating freedom of grace. I want to share the joy of living out of what Jesus has already accomplished and God says true about me. That I am a saint. A new creation. A beloved child of God. I relate to the mission statement of Paul when he wrote these words.

    But my life is worth nothing to me unless I use it for finishing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus—the work of telling others the Good News about the wonderful grace of God. (Acts 20:24, NLT)

    I feel called to be a messenger of hope and grace. Plus I feel like the negative team has a pretty full roster of contributors.

    I still believe that is my calling with these humble ramblings. But my friend’s question is a fair one. What does it look like to have sincere disagreements over cultural and political issues?

    It is fascinating how two people can look at the same information and reach completely opposite conclusions. So I am going to offer the “Grace Rules of Engagement” as a roadmap for civil discussion.

    • Sincere followers of Jesus can look at cultural or political issues and have very different opinions. Jesus loves His children on both sides of the argument.

    I know I have changed my views on some cultural issues over my years of walking with Jesus. I was a child in the era when divorce was a mortal sin. I absolutely am committed to the idea of a husband and wife taking their vows seriously. But I learned that the cultural shame of divorce caused many Christian women to feel trapped in relationships of abuse. Clearly that was not the desire of a loving Heavenly Father who ordained marriage. In those sad situations it is necessary to divorce an abusive spouse. In the pulpits of my youth the message was no divorce outside of adultery was ever justified. I had a blind spot about how a declaration that appeared Biblical could foster abuse. So many issues we discuss have similar and complex nuances. We need to discuss, not demonize.

    • The goal of a discussion should not be to win.

    Thoughtful discourse is impossible when one of the participants only cares about winning the debate. The goal of any conversation should be graceful exchange of ideas without rude interruptions, condescending gestures, or angry exchanges. I would rather have a goal of being winsome instead of winning. That attitude fosters conversation.

    • People of different viewpoints should commit to listen. Nothing shows respect more than carefully listening to the arguments of those with whom you disagree and then gently offering thoughtful responses.

    Listen to talking heads on television news shows as they “discuss” different points of view. As soon as one side starts talking the other shakes their head, smirks, and then interrupts and talks over the other person. How is that going to persuade anyone? Yet we tend to do the same thing when we have significant disagreements with people of faith. Listen. Really listen. Let them finish their point. Then respond in grace.

    • Ask questions.

    You will not influence another person by arguing. The way to connect is to ask questions and try to understand why they feel the way they do. I have found that many times people I talk with don’t have a solid reason for their feelings. That can be a opening to honestly discuss difficult topics.

    • Climb out of your bubble

    Find out what the other person is reading and watching. Expose yourself to different points of view and encourage those you have disagreements with to do the same. If you are confident in your beliefs there should be no fear in being exposed to differing viewpoints.

    • All of us are a work in process.

    Every child of God is in process. I am a very different Christian than I was 20, 10, or even 5 years ago. I am growing (hopefully) in grace and truth. I strongly believed and said things years ago that I am grieved about today. Thankfully God was patiently working with my heart and gently shining the light of the Holy Spirit on my blind spots. I need to give that grace to others.

    • Pray for wisdom and grace then leave the results to God.

    So what is the goal when you have sincere disagreements with another believer over cultural issues? Use the “Grace Guidelines” and relax. God may be using you to plant seeds in the heart of the other person. Maybe you have a blind spot that needs the refining work of the Holy Spirit. Share your heart with love and kindness and be open to the possibility that you may be the one who needs to change your heart.

    • Grace never cancels

    Grace does not “cancel”. Grace does not shame. Grace does not answer anger with anger. The person you totally disagree with may be crying out of pain and deep wounding. Perhaps a gentle answer will give hope. Grace does not lash out when challenged. Grace is kind and gentle.

    Being graceful can be a pain in the hind regions but it is what we are called to offer to others. Paul addresses this to the church at Colossae.

    Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

    Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

    Colossians 3:12-17, NLT

    Perhaps the most important thing all of us can do to further the unity in the body of Christ is to memorize that passage and try to implement those words for 30 days. By the grace of God it could become a habit.

    Be kind to those who disagree and remember the words of author Alexander MacLaren. “Kindness makes a person attractive. If you would win the world, melt it, do not hammer it.”

  • The Cancel Culture and Grace

    The Cancel Culture and Grace

    Cancel used to be a fairly straight forward transaction. You canceled a reservation to dinner. Your flight was cancelled. Now cancel can mean your reputation and very career can be ruined if you offer an opinion that is controversial or unacceptable in the crazy court of social media. The normal sentence is shaming the person who dared offer some thought counter to the prevailing cultural trends. I understand pushing back against hateful stereotypes and name calling. That needs to be called out. But more and more this technique is being used to silence the heartfelt convictions of people who simply have a different world view.

    Questioning a cultural trend now results in public shaming, bullying, and harassment.

    I loathe the strategy of organized shaming to silence speech and cultural discourse. One of my personal hypocrisy tests is to examine my own propensity to “cancel” others that I don’t agree with. I might not launch an online attack but the reality is that refusing to entertain the viewpoints of others can effectively cancel them in your own heart.

    Sadly the church was canceling before canceling was cool. I grew up being taught that if you did not hold a particular doctrine you were not a real Christian. You were “canceled” from fellowship. If you partook in activities that were not sanctioned by the denominational rulebook you were canceled. These rules often were not biblical. They were man made convictions that had nothing to do with the redemptive work of Jesus. For example, our church said we couldn’t go bowling because alcohol was served at the bowling alley. These kind of legalistic rules became as important to some in the church as actual Biblical teachings about forgiveness, serving one another, and loving your neighbor. The result of a “rules religion” is brilliantly summarized by Tim Keller in his book Prodigal God.

    “We tend to draw conservative, buttoned-down, moralistic people. The licentious and liberated or the broken and marginal avoid church. That can only mean one thing. If the preaching of our ministers and the practice of our parishioners do not have the same effect on people that Jesus had, then we must not be declaring the same message that Jesus did.”

    Our culture says you have to act correctly and you will be loved. Jesus said you are loved no matter what you have said or done. The culture says clean up your act and you will be forgiven. Jesus says you can be forgiven by simply accepting His gift of grace and redemption with no clean up required. It is one hundred percent His work on the Cross and nothing that you or I bring to the table.

    A song by one of my favorite artists, Andrew Peterson, reminds me of the mystery of grace. Peterson beautifully illustrates that I am like every sinner who ever lived or will live. Peterson’s lyrics hit home and remind me that I am saved by grace alone. I was a sinner in need of a Savior. Andrew Peterson’s lyrics describe it well.

    I am the woman at the well, I am the harlot
    I am the scattered seed that fell along the path
    I am the son who ran away
    I am the bitter son who stayed

    I am the angry men who came to stone the lover
    I am the woman there ashamed before the crowd
    I am the leper who gave thanks
    I am the nine who never came

    Paul tells us that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. I used to feel superior to those who violated my denomination’s “Top 10 list of things not to do if you are a real Christian”. But I came to realize that having less repulsive sins on my resume than someone else only mattered to my miserable band of legalists. I still fell short.

    I have come to understand why legalism is so much easier than grace. Legalism allows me to assess the situation and then apply a verse or assign a task. If that person rejects that Biblical admonition or task then legalism allows me to withdraw because they are disobedient. Grace does not give me that option. Grace demands that I move toward the struggle of my brother or sister and not away in judgment. No wonder grace is a tough sell.

    A quote by Pastor Paul Donnan says it far better than I ever could.

    Grace doesn’t treat us better than we deserve. It treats us without the slightest reference to what we deserve. Grace ceases to be grace if God withdraws it upon any human failure. If Grace is in any way tied to something you do, then it is no longer a gift but a wage, and that’s not grace.

    Grace does not “cancel”. Grace does not shame. Grace does not answer anger with anger. That person is likely crying out of pain and deep wounding. Perhaps a gentle answer will give hope. Grace does not lash out when wronged. Grace is kind and gentle.

    Being graceful is a pain in the hind regions but it is what we are called to offer to others. Paul addresses this to the church at Colossae.

    You have died with Christ, and he has set you free from the spiritual powers of this world. So why do you keep on following the rules of the world, such as, “Don’t handle! Don’t taste! Don’t touch!”? Such rules are mere human teachings about things that deteriorate as we use them. These rules may seem wise because they require strong devotion, pious self-denial, and severe bodily discipline. But they provide no help in conquering a person’s evil desires. (Colossians 2:20-23)

    It is time for followers of Christ to quit canceling one another over issues that don’t mean squat to those who desperately need to hear the good news of the Gospel. Hurting souls don’t care about our denominational divides. They need Jesus. It is time to focus on the One who unites us instead of the things that divide us. We need to focus on becoming a light in this terrible darkness. There are so many hurting and sad people who want our message of hope in Christ to be true. Why would they examine our faith if the church can’t be united as followers of Jesus?

    One more thought from Paul.

    Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone. (Colossians 4:5-6)

    Be kind to those who disagree and remember the words of author Alexander MacLaren. “Kindness makes a person attractive. If you would win the world, melt it, do not hammer it.”

    Don’t cancel others. Give grace. Forgive. Love one another. Be kind.

    Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. (Ephesians 4:15, NLT)