Charisa Stories

Tag: Jesus

  • Do You Not Love God if You Don’t Love Your Neighbor?

    I recently finished a free online course from Dallas Theological Seminary taught by Dr. Stanley Toussaint. His application from the Parable of the Good Samaritan was simple and positively convicting.

    ”You can tell how a person loves God by how they love people.”

    Ouch. My defensive response included an excuse about how difficult it is to love some people. Come on Lord. You know them better than I do!

    Later that day I cued a Spotify country song list and up popped a tune by bluegrass singer Rhonda Vincent. God has a sense of humor. The song is called “You Don’t Love God If You Don’t Love Your Neighbor” and the lyrics begin like this.

    There are many people
    who will say they’re Christians
    and they live like Christians on the Sabbath day

    But come Monday morning, til the coming Sunday
    They will fight their neighbor all along the way.

    {chorus}

    Oh you don’t love God, if you don’t love your neighbor
    if you gossip about him, if you never have mercy
    if he gets into trouble, and you don’t try to help him
    then you don’t love your neighbor, and you don’t love God

    I am going to keep my judge’s robe in the closet and not evaluate your heart and whether you love God or not. But I can say from uncomfortable personal experience that if you are living the lyrics above you may want to take a look at your actions in lieu of this command of Jesus.

    A religious expert on the law tried to trap Jesus by asking this question.

    “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”
    Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” (Matthew 22:36-39 NLT)

     The hypocrisy of so many who claim the name of Jesus Christ is the most consistent complaint that I hear from my tens of readers. I hear it from those who are churched, unchurched, and those who wish they had an option other than church. My book When Bad Christians Happen To Good People addressed this topic honestly.

    Why do we often fail in this command to love others? I think some insight that I picked up from my buddies at Truefaced.com helped me to understand the issue.

    Knowing truth does not transform lives. Only trusting truth transforms lives.

    We have lots of people who have logged a lot of pew time and heard tons of teaching. They have memorized verses and they can speak fluent Churchianity. Yet they demonstrate little or no difference from their neighbors who go to church only on Easter and Christmas or maybe never darken the church doors. How can that be?

    I think that for too many Christians they have not fully trusted the truth they have heard. I am learning to put my full weight on the truths that are foundational. That God supernaturally changed me at the moment I put my trust in Jesus for my salvation. I became a new person. So my standing in God’s eyes is not about what I do but about who I am. Do I trust that truth? Do you?

    Do you believe that God’s faithfulness and loving kindness and grace will sustain you in whatever circumstance you find yourself in? Are you willing to give up control and trust that God has your back and your best interests in His eternal plan? Or do you fear that He might require you to go or do something that you really don’t want to do? Does that kind of thinking make sense in light of what Paul writes about Christ?

    Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. (Romans 5, NLT)

    Do I really think that a God that loved me like that would punish me with a bad assignment to love unlovable people because He is displeased with me? Jesus did not say that He came so that I could have life sporadically. He promised abundantly and that means to follow His commands. So I am choosing to trust the truths that I have known for many years. He is trustworthy. His Word is true. I am wasting my time if I don’t put my full weight on those truths. Slowly and often awkwardly I am learning to do that. And it is changing me.

    When I lean fully on who I am in Christ and how remarkable His gift of grace was to an undeserving sinner it makes loving my sometimes annoying neighbor a whole lot more possible. And my response to my neighbor is a good measuring stick of how much God’s love is filling my heart.

  • Why Misplaced Hope Makes Life So Hard

    It is more than a little disconcerting to see the division, anger, and hatred we are witnessing in our country. I experienced a similar season in the late 1960’s but this one seems even more intense. Perhaps social media and 24 hour news exacerbates the tension. As a self-righteous know-it-all back then I thought we would be able to fix everything my parent’s generation had messed up. We had great hope that we would change the system and fix the problems.

    We thought that hope would be realized with the right leader or a political party. In retrospect I see that I was putting my long game hope in all the wrong places.

    The word hope is used about 80 times in the New Testament. The first appearance of the word in the NIV New Testament translation pretty much lays out my belief that my hope is not found in the houses of power.

    “In his name (Jesus) the nations will put their hope.” (Matthew 12, NIV)

    Paul wrote about the hope that I now have in his letter to the Romans.

    I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13, NIV)

    Real hope occurs when I remember who I am.
    I am a follower of Jesus. A child of God. A servant who is humbled by His amazing grace. A person who has been changed because of Christ. A follower of the Lord who believes that God is sovereign and His plan will be fulfilled.

    When those truths are my focus I have hope that is real. I have peace that transcends circumstance. When I keep my eyes on Jesus, I maintain a better perspective on every area of my life. You do that by remembering what really matters.

    Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like Him. In this new life, it doesn’t matter if you are a Jew or a Gentile, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbaric, uncivilized, slave, or free. Christ is all that matters, and He lives in all of us. (Colossians 3:10-11, NLT)

    I remember a campfire song from the Jesus movement that was, to borrow the approach of Law and Order, “ripped” from the Gospel of Matthew. (Matthew 6:33)

    Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness;
    and all these things shall be added unto you.
    Allelu, alleluia

    Who (or what) are you centering your hope on today? Hope grows when you seek Jesus and rest in His Righteousness. Nothing else makes sense.

  • The Most Difficult Thing Jesus Asks of Us

    I think forgiveness is the most challenging thing Jesus commands us to do. I sometimes ignore God’s Word about forgiveness and whether someone “deserves” mercy. Scripture can be so annoying! Paul threw down this difficult challenge to the Ephesian church.

    Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)

    That is a very tall order and one that is impossible to do without remembering how much I have been forgiven. If you say something nasty about me and ask for forgiveness, I will probably grant it. If you do it again and ask forgiveness, I might forgive you again. If you do the same thing again and ask forgiveness, I will most likely respond with skepticism and ask you to “prove” you are sorry.

    Yet that illustration is exactly what I do in my relationship with God every day. I have asked Him to forgive the same sin dozens, even hundreds of times. Still His Word tells me I am forgiven and He loves me just the same as the first time I confessed that sin. That is how God has forgiven me through Christ. I should respond accordingly to others, forgiving out of profound gratitude. Do you see any way around the obvious command to forgive? Me either.

     Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. (Colossians 3:13, NLT)

    Bottom line: we are commanded to forgive as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness may well be the missing ingredient to the healing of most relationships. Forgive the one who wounded you. Forgive yourself and seek forgiveness if you are the one who wounded.

    I imagine Jesus’ heart is saddened by my stubborn refusal to consider His forgiveness extended to me and, consequently, my refusal to lean on His power to forgive.

    The reality is that there is fear on the road to forgiveness whenever I take my eyes off of Christ. My heart cries out in protest. What if they reject, scoff, or take advantage of my forgiveness? Jesus reminds me gently that He understands. And it is the right thing to do, no matter how the other party responds.

    When I allow God to heal my heart and give me the power to forgive others the weight of the world is lifted off my soul. Sadly, too often, it is the road less taken. But it is the path that will make a difference in my (and your) journey with Jesus.

    Author Will Davis Jr. explains that forgiveness is a process empowered by taking the step of faith.

    “Once you decide to forgive, you initiate the healing process. Forgiveness gives your soul permission to move on to the higher and healthier ground of emotional recovery. Forgiveness is to your soul what antibiotics are to infection. It is the curative agent that will help to fully restore your soul. It doesn’t immediately remove the pain of the offense but it does start you on the road to recovery.”

    I really like that perspective. The decision to forgive initiates but does not complete healing. You and I will, in time, heal. But we will never get there without taking the first step of faith.

    I have spent a lot of unhappy moments not enjoying the freedom the Lord intended because I did not want to forgive someone who hurt me. I grieve to think of how I have stubbornly refused to forgive others for real and/or perceived slights over the years. I can imagine Jesus looking at me with sadness (not condemnation) because I have not fully comprehended the magnitude of the debt that has been erased from my account because of Him. If I cannot forgive, I have forgotten or never comprehended how much I have been forgiven.

    How quickly I forget. I forget how much I have been forgiven. I forget how much I am loved by Jesus. I forget that I am a brand new creation. I forget I am righteous because of the finished  work of Christ. I forget that there is no condemnation in Christ. I forget that I am a beloved child of God and He is for me. I forget that He has my back and He has me in His hand forever. I am forgetful.

    But thank God He does not forget His promises. I need to remember that today.

  • The Number One Component for Healthy Community

    Bill Withers wrote and recorded a song that we could sing in church on Sundays. The lyrics talk about the pain we all endure and the need for community to help us through.

    Sometimes in our lives
    We all have pain
    We all have sorrow

    Lean on me, when you’re not strong
    And I’ll be your friend
    I’ll help you carry on

    I write a lot about grace in community. Some say too much. To be honest, I have had moments when I wondered if living in community with messy people is worth it. I have come to understand why legalism is so much easier than grace. Legalism allows me to assess the situation and then apply a verse, assign a task, and move away in self-righteous expectation. If that person rejects that Biblical admonition or task then legalism allows me to withdraw because they are disobedient. Grace does not give me that option. Grace demands that I move toward the struggle of my brother or sister and not away in judgment. No wonder grace can be a tough sell.

    That is the glorious dichotomy of grace. Grace wears me out and lifts me up. Grace frustrates and exhilarates.  My old nature screams that people who make bad decisions over and over get what they “deserve”. They don’t “deserve” to be pursued and loved and restored. They made their bed now let them lay in it. But there is a small quiet voice in my heart that tells me that they have value. That they are loved by their Creator. And that voice asks who am I to decide who “deserves” anything?

    A quote by Pastor Paul Donnan says it far better than I ever could.

    “Grace doesn’t treat us better than we deserve. It treats us without the slightest reference to what we deserve. Grace ceases to be grace if God withdraws it upon any human failure. If Grace is in any way tied to something you do, then it is no longer a gift but a wage, and that’s not grace.”

    And, to be selfish, the lyrics of Bill Withers tells me why it is in my own best interest to give grace willingly.

    I’ll help you carry on
    For it won’t be long
    Till I’m gonna need
    Somebody to lean on

    Yep. It is just a matter of time until I will be begging for grace for some stupid action or words. Paul knew that was true and reminded the Galatian Church.

    Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived. (Galatians 6, The Message)

    Why are we so willing to receive grace and not extend it? Maybe the next lyric has a clue.

    Please swallow your pride
    If I have things you need to borrow
    For no one can fill those of your needs
    That you won’t let show

    Pride. Pride causes us to cover our needs because that would show weakness. Pride tells us to wear a mask of false joy so that others won’t know our shame and sin and need. Our Father in Heaven designed this journey to be lived in community. God knows that we need Him and we need one another. So drop the mask of false joy. Be honest and express your need for community.

    We all need somebody to lean on
    I just might have a problem
    That you’ll understand

    We all need somebody to lean on

    Yes it is hard to walk with the wounded. Yes it is frustrating to watch messy people make the same mistakes over and over. Yes it is tiring to give grace to the needy. But my heart’s desire remains the same. These words in Hebrews wrap it up nicely.

    And don’t forget to do good and to share with those in need. These are the sacrifices that please God. (Hebrews 13:16)

    Do the right thing. We all need one another and especially now. Love God this week by being kind to some of His children.

  • How Does God Measure Your Value Differently from the World?

    Valuing everyone is how Jesus lived. He modeled that value with women, children, people with physical and mental challenges, lepers, social outcasts, and sinners. He served the weak and loved the unloved. He created the template for the New Testament church.

    How did the early church explode and multiply against all odds? By serving selflessly, recklessly, and fearlessly. There was nothing comfortable about spreading the news about Jesus in the days, months, and years after His resurrection. The Apostles understood after the Cross what Jesus had been trying to tell them earlier. That the world measures greatness on an entirely different scale from the one that God uses.

    Remember that debate among the apostles? They had the criteria for greatness completely wrong.

    They began to argue among themselves about who would be the greatest among them. Jesus told them, “In this world the kings and great men lord it over their people, yet they are called ‘friends of the people.’ But among you it will be different. Those who are the greatest among you should take the lowest rank, and the leader should be like a servant. Who is more important, the one who sits at the table or the one who serves? The one who sits at the table, of course. But not here! For I am among you as one who serves.”
    (Luke 22:24-27, NLT)

    The best way to take your eyes off your own circumstances is to serve others. Even as Jesus faced the horror of the Cross, He was serving others.

    Martin Luther King Jr. said it well: “Everybody can be great . . . because anybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.”

    Amen.

    Every person in the body of Christ can serve in some way. It may be running errands for a seasoned citizen who can no longer drive. It may be babysitting for a harried young mom. It may be providing a meal to a family dealing with illness. It may be calling or visiting a lonely person. Sometimes listening is one of the greatest ways to serve others. Maybe one subtle way to serve is simply appreciating those people whom you work and live with in community.

    The Carrot Principle, a book by Adrian Gostick and Chester Elton, determined that appreciation might well be the missing accelerator for happiness and ­self-​­esteem. Based on a ­ten-​­year study in which two hundred thousand people were interviewed, the authors conclude that appreciation tops the list of things employees say they want from their bosses. For those who worked in offices with high morale, an amazing 94 percent reported that they were shown appreciation. Not surprisingly, when employees quit, nearly 80 percent cited lack of appreciation as the number one reason.

    I suspect that heartfelt appreciation is in short supply in our faith communities as well. That is a wonderful way you can serve others. Simply affirm and bless them in their gifts and skills.

    Serving can be the smallest gesture, or it can be a selfless response to a crisis. I absolutely love the slogan from the Salvation Army: “We combat natural disasters with Acts of God.”

    That is a powerful thought. We as the body of Christ commit “acts of God” by loving, helping, and healing those who suffer from a disaster, or sometimes just from life. My insurance policy outlines “acts of God” as a way to diminish liability. My understanding of God’s Word is that we have increased liability when others need help.

    I pray that I will be willing to commit an “act of God” whenever I see a hurting person. When a student is struggling and needs mentoring, you can commit an “act of God.” When a family does not have money for gifts at Christmas, your “act of God” will make the difference. When someone is feeling blue, you can affirm and lift that person’s spirits by simply being present and caring. Jesus taught that these things we do are acts for God.

    “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world. For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’

    “Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’

    “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!’ (Matthew 25:34-40, NLT)

    Part of the journey to connect more effectively to God and others is simple. Get outside yourself by serving and affirming others. The rewards are remarkable and God is glorified by your actions.

  • Jesus is the Escape Plan From a Difficult Past

    I love this quote from E. L. Doctorow about writing: “It’s like driving a car at night: you never see further than your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.”

    That is profoundly simple and true. I think this principle applies to writing, living, and especially for living a life of faith.

    Life is like driving in fog. I wish I could see farther ahead on my journey, but the truth is, I cannot. I can see only as far as the light that illuminates my path. Because I’m a Christian, that is all I really need to know. Christ, my Light, reassures me that I can (and will) make the whole trip in that way. But there is fear in the unknown of the future, and it is easy to dwell in the predictable events of the past.

    Not dwelling in the past is a huge issue to address on my journey to trust God even in difficult moments.

    Paul described his past to the church at Philippi. He wrote that what he used to view as valuable he now viewed as garbage, compared to the priceless value of knowing Christ. He explained his desire to know Christ better. And then Paul gave a note of encouragement and a path to achieve that goal by focusing on Christ and always moving forward.

    No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. (Philippians 3:13-14)

    That is the plan. I forget the past, look forward, and then take one stride at a time to the finish line. I can’t backpedal and finish the race. I can’t run in place and finish the race. I can’t take one mighty leap to finish the race. I certainly can’t stop and finish the race. It is about putting one foot in front of the other.

    Forgetting the past is hard. I know that. I have struggled mightily, and at times quite unsuccessfully, with letting go of things that wounded me in the past.

    Because of Christ, I know that I will not be abandoned or unloved. Every day that I wake up and focus on my Protector, Jesus, I know that I can relax and live in the moment. Some days I can live with joy. Other days are not so joyful, but I can always live in the assurance of the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

    Satan wants desperately to have me wallow in regret or shame of the past. Followers of Christ have an escape plan. It’s not always easy to implement. The power for healing is there. Bible teacher and author Warren Wiersbe offers a good perspective on this challenge, as he analyzes how Paul related to the past.

    “Forgetting those things which are behind” does not suggest an impossible feat of mental and psychological gymnastics by which we try to erase the sins and mistakes of the past. It simply means that we break the power of the past by living for the future. We cannot change the past, but we can change the meaning of the past. There were things in Paul’s past that could have been weights to hold him back (1 Tim. 1:12-17), but they became inspirations to speed him ahead. The events did not change, but his understanding of them changed. ”

    I can’t magically erase the events and pain of prior events, but I can break their power. I can change the meaning of the past. I can live for the future. I can believe that I am a new creation because of the finished work of Christ. And I can begin to see myself as God sees me. The past does not define me; Jesus does.

  • So You Think You are Strong Enough to Handle Anything? Think Again.

    After listening to a few minutes of depressing news I needed a little soul nourishment. Rich Mullins is one of my go to songwriters for that need. The first song that played was very timely in this season of uncertainty.  “We Are Not As Strong As We Think We Are” shows how our relationships can be fragile in the best of times.

    Well, it took the hand of God Almighty
    To part the waters of the sea
    But it only took one little lie
    To separate you and me
    Oh, we are not as strong as we think we are.

    If only we could acknowledge that we are not as strong as we think we are and then live accordingly I believe we would see an amazing difference. 

    I need God and the community of believers to be spiritually and emotionally healthy. Yet pride often tells me that I am able to handle the situation. Fear tells me that revealing the needs of my heart will only make things worse. So one little lie or misunderstanding dealt with in my own strength negates the strength of a God who could part the waters of the seas. I choose my incapable power over the One who could heal my pain if only I would let Him.

    We try ignore or bury the internal toxins of relational hurt, misunderstandings, accusations, and fear. We seal those emotional and spiritual poisons up hoping it will somehow be okay. But the toxins in our heart have not been removed, only compartmentalized. The pain continues to grow, slowly and inexorably. Finally the pressure builds to the point of explosion. There is a better way.

    Paul described that better way to the Colossians.

    Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. 

    (Colossians 3:12-15, NLT)

    Sometimes I dream that the body of Christ would commit to spend 30 days living and breathing just those four verses. What would that look like? How much healing would happen? I think four verses could spark revival.

    But we pull back and try to go it alone. Even if we attempt to walk in community we are too afraid or proud to share our needs. Rich Mullins was exactly right. We are not as strong as we think we are. Especially in this weird social media environment we need each other more than ever. So I am going to encourage you to reach out before you lash out. Ask for healing before you hurt yourself and others. 

    And if you find yourself in a decent place right now ask God to show you someone that you can reach out to and love. Call them. Text them. Ask how they are doing. God is serious about how we communicate about others in the flock. Peter writes:

    Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless—that’s your job, to bless. You’ll be a blessing and also get a blessing. (1 Peter 3:8-9, The Message)

    Rich Mullin’s wrote that weakness is not a sin. Failing to acknowledge our need for God’s strength is the sin.

    We are frail
    We are fearfully and wonderfully made
    Forged in the fires of human passion
    Choking on the fumes of selfish rage
    And with these our hells and our heavens
    So few inches apart
    We must be awfully small
    And not as strong as we think we are.

    No, we are not as strong as we think we are. We need to acknowledge that He is God and we are not.

    He will hold you in your fear and anxiety. We need to leave our pride at the foot of the Cross and depend on His grace and strength. And we need to not kid ourselves about this simple truth. We are not as strong as we THINK we are. We need Jesus. We need each other.