Charisa Stories

Tag: peter

  • Surviving a Storm

    Surviving a Storm

    Sometimes this faith journey goes pretty smoothly and it is easy to express your trust and dependence on God.

    At other times it feels lonely, frightening and sad. In 2020 it feels like we have been navigating the latter reality most of the time. The weird relational dynamic of this year exacerbates normal life stressers.

    I give grace and it is not returned. Every street feels like it is one-way. Dear friends are deeply wounded by words and posts from people who claim to be following Jesus. Judgements are rendered that are not ours to make. I agonize over how these believers can wound so deeply and still say they know Christ? Marriage vows are abandoned at the altar of self. Illness ravages families and friends. I question my ability to have any impact for Christ as I stumble clumsily through my own journey.

    Simple trust is a concept that is anything but simple to live out. And yet I am convinced that the simple act of trust and faith pleases God more than any blog I can write, good deed I can perform or gift I can offer. The truth is that all of those things flow naturally out of trust anyway. I try to reverse the order by doing, giving and performing to try and “beef” up my trust. I think God is saying during these days to quit flailing and start trusting. Yet we don’t feel like we are being “good” Christians if we are not performing and doing. So Jesus gave us a lengthy to do list in the Gospel of John.

    1. Jesus told them, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.”

    So there you have it. That’s the list if you insist on performance based faith. Believe in the one He has sent.

    I believe God’s promises intellectually. During times like these He is asking me to believe them in my heart. The key is to keep my eyes on Jesus and His grace. Peter learned that lesson during a literal storm.

    Meanwhile, the disciples were in trouble far away from land, for a strong wind had risen, and they were fighting heavy waves. About three o’clock in the morning Jesus came toward them, walking on the water. When the disciples saw him walking on the water, they were terrified. In their fear, they cried out, “It’s a ghost!” But Jesus spoke to them at once. “Don’t be afraid,” he said. “Take courage. I am here!” Then Peter called to him, “Lord, if it’s really you, tell me to come to you, walking on the water.” 

    “Yes, come,” Jesus said.

    So Peter went over the side of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus.  But when he saw the strong wind and the waves, he was terrified and began to sink. “Save me, Lord!” he shouted.

    Jesus immediately reached out and grabbed him. “You have so little faith,” Jesus said. “Why did you doubt me?”   (Matthew 14, NLT)

    It is so easy to judge Peter while I am busy doing the same thing. Recognizing my own hypocrisy is really annoying. Peter made the same mistake that I make often. He took his eyes off of Jesus and looked at the storm. The waves and wind are terrifying when you face them alone. But I don’t have to. And neither do you. I write a lot about community and the need for others. There are times when all of us need to focus on Jesus and Jesus alone. Grace reminds me that when I fail Jesus will immediately reach out and grab me at the instant I call out to Him. So I find myself at peace today. Circumstances change constantly but my focus can stay where it should be. How do we ride out this storm?

    Believe in Jesus and keep your eyes on Him. A hymn I remember as a child is spot on for these times.

    Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
    Look full in His wonderful face,
    And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
    In the light of His glory and grace.

  • The Worst Day of Peter’s Life

    The Worst Day of Peter’s Life

    There is much written about Good Friday. The sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the Cross is incomprehensible to my puny human intellect. There is much written about Easter Sunday. Christians around the world rejoice and proclaim that “He is risen!”. But there is not nearly as much written about one of the saddest and most confusing days in history. The Saturday between the Friday horror of Jesus on the Cross and the Sunday mystery of the resurrection. Some churches do observe Holy Saturday but it was never a tradition in my faith upbringing.

    I have been thinking about what that day must have been like for those who dropped everything to follow Jesus. How crushing those events had to be. I imagine the fear they felt that they would also be killed. And for what? On Saturday they feared they had given their careers and their very souls for a false hope.

    I think in particular of Peter. I identify so much with him. Like him I throw down bold statements of loyalty to the Lord and then let Him down. Like him I draw attention to my own accomplishments instead of recognizing where my accomplishments come from. Like Peter I am a generally sincere but desperately needy follower of Jesus.

    You know the story about Peter before the arrest and mock trial of Jesus. Jesus tells Peter that he will deny him three times before the rooster crows at dawn. For many years I breezed by the setup to that prediction.

    “Simon (Peter), Satan has asked to sift each of you like wheat. But I have pleaded in prayer for you, Simon, that your faith should not fail. So when you have repented and turned to me again, strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22, NLT)

    Jesus had already prayerfully pleaded for Peter to be used in a powerful and redemptive way before the failure, shame and repentance that Jesus knew was about to happen. Our sin does not take Jesus by surprise. Why does His grace and forgiveness surprise us?

    Like me, Peter did not hear the tender words of encouragement from the Lord. Nope. He blustered.

    “Lord, I am ready to go to prison with you, and even to die with you.”

    After the arrest of Jesus a suddenly less bold Peter followed the crowd. He denied to a servant girl that he knew Jesus. He denied his alliance to another bystander. The crushing sorrow and shame of what happened next is hard to fathom.

    About an hour later someone else insisted, “This must be one of them, because he is a Galilean, too.”

    But Peter said, “Man, I don’t know what you are talking about.” And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed.

    At that moment the Lord turned and looked at Peter. Suddenly, the Lord’s words flashed through Peter’s mind: “Before the rooster crows tomorrow morning, you will deny three times that you even know me.” And Peter left the courtyard, weeping bitterly.

    I imagined what the expression might have been on the face of Jesus when He turned and looked. I suspect it was a look of sadness, compassion and longing to comfort His friend. But what Peter probably saw was only disappointment and failure. Peter’s tears likely flowed until they could no longer flow. I suspect it was hard to even breathe. His heart literally ached within his chest. His mind could not imagine any future hope. I wonder if he thought about running away or even ending it all. I wonder if he could think at all.

    That Saturday was one of the worst days in history and Peter may have felt the pain of that awful day more intensely than anyone. He did not know what would happen the next day. Peter did not yet understand what Jesus had been telling him.

    When Luke recounts that Jesus appeared to the Disciples the only one mentioned by name is Peter. What gives me hope this Easter season is the tender story of Jesus affirming and reinstating Peter to be a leader who would “feed His sheep”. That is the grace that changes a heart.

    I can betray Jesus. Ignore Him. Live selfishly. At some point I once again recognize my desperate need for Jesus to rescue me. For the one millionth time I turn to Him. And what happens? He lifts my shame bowed head and looks deeply into my eyes. He tells me how much He loves me. That is grace. That is real. That is love. Maybe I won’t have a day quite as bad as Peter on that horrible dark Saturday but his story of redemption encourages me this Easter season.

    Saturday was terrible. But Sunday was coming with the wonderful news that He is risen! He is risen for me! Jesus is pleading for me that my faith will not fail. What a joyous hope for all of us this Easter.

    Join me on a journey to become more connected to God and one another.