Charisa Stories

Tag: trust god

  • Hold Me Jesus

    One of my peers recently noted that “getting old is not for sissies”.

    Indeed.

    Even if you escape personal difficulties you will undoubtedly have family and friends who are going through physical, emotional and spiritual trials. One of the songs that I default to when I am walking through valleys with others is from singer/composer Rich Mullins. The song is from his CD called Songs and it is simply titled “Hold Me Jesus”. 

    Well, sometimes my life
    Just don’t make sense at all
    When the mountains look so big
    And my faith just seems so small

    Right now I am in a pretty good place in my life and journey with Jesus. But then I started thinking about the many friends and loved ones who could relate completely to those lyrics in their current situation. And I can certainly remember seasons of my life when those words accurately reflected the condition of my soul.

    And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
    It’s so hot inside my soul
    I swear there must be blisters on my heart

    And I remember how I used to respond. I would deduce it was my fault and I would decide that I had to do something to bolster my faith. I had to read more verses or do a study or pray more or believe more. But the answer was far more simple and the chorus by Rich Mullins nails it.

    So hold me Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf
    You have been King of my glory
    Won’t You be my Prince of Peace

    I need to quit flailing and trying so darn hard to be righteous. Hold me Jesus. Won’t you be my Prince of Peace? I have started praying a prayer that is simple and profound.

    “Jesus…would you love me today?”

    And He does. But I remember how I used to think that I had to “do stuff” for God to earn His favor and receive His love and peace. For those of us “doers” who absolutely must do something I have our assignment.

    Trust God.

    That’s it. I have made it so stinkin’ complicated and religious for so many years. When I exercise that simple act of faith I can move forward with confidence. When I trust God obedience comes out of gratitude and not teeth gritting compliance.

    Why did I fight His amazing grace and His unconditional love. Rich Mullins nails that too.

    Surrender don’t come natural to me
    I’d rather fight You for something
    I don’t really want
    Than to take what You give that I need
    And I’ve beat my head against so many walls
    Now I’m falling down, I’m falling on my knees

    That was me. Hanging on to the familiar malaise of self-effort instead of surrendering and accepting grace and freedom. Rich Mullins is now with the King of Glory and the Prince of Peace but his ministry continues around the world. Next time you are flailing and striving to please God why not try that little prayer.

    “Jesus…would you love me today?”

    “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”  (Matthew 11, The Message)

  • Don’t Blink


    As I celebrated birthday number 70 last week a song fired up from Kenny Chesney. In the lyrics an interviewer asks a man celebrating his one hundred and second birthday about his secret to life. His response?

    Don’t blink

    He talks about how life seems to be a blink from childhood to reaching the century mark. I’m still a ways from the century mark though my shoulder feels that old this morning. It seems like just yesterday that I was playing sandlot baseball as a kid. Moments ago I was in high school being Attention Deficit before ADD was cool. Just yesterday I met the stunning Joni Banks and somehow talked her into dating me. Wasn’t it just weeks ago that three adorable baby boys came into our lives?

    Don’t blink.

    Married almost 47 years. Five decades of directing live TV sporting events. Seven grandchildren. Are you kidding me?

    I have had, if I may borrow the franchise of Frank Capra, a wonderful life. Through it all I feel blessed beyond comprehension. I believe that is because I found my reason for being here. Pastor and author Rick Warren summed it up nicely in a recent interview.

    People ask me, What is the purpose of life? And I respond, In a nutshell, life is preparation for eternity. We were made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven. One day my heart is going to stop, and that will be the end of my body – but not the end of me. I may live 60 to 100 years on earth, but I am going to spend trillion of years in eternity. This is the warm-up act, the dress rehearsal. God wants us to practice on earth what we will do forever in eternity. We were made by God and for God, and until you figure that out, life isn’t going to make sense.

    Life is a series of problems: Either you are in one now, you’re just coming out of one or you’re getting ready to go into another one. The reason for this is that God is more interested in your character than your comfort. God is more interested in making your life holy than He is in making your life happy. We can be reasonably happy here on earth, but that’s not the goal of life: The goal is to grow in character, In Christ-likeness.

    If this is the warm-up act for my eternity gig on the main stage then all of this is merely preparation. Football players hate the two-a-day practices in the brutal heat. But they love the exhilaration of victory that the difficult preparation allows for later in the season. Sometimes the two-a-days of life seem cruel and without purpose. But my understanding of the God who made me and His purpose for me allows me to believe there is purpose and design. I don’t always see it. I love being happy and carefree. But if my purpose is preparation for my real gig then I need to live out of my new identity and trust God to mature me in Christ-likeness. Paul wrote this in the book of Colossians.

    Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits at God’s right hand in the place of honor and power. Let heaven fill your thoughts. Do not think only about things down here on earth. For you died when Christ died, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God. And when Christ, who is your real life, is revealed to the whole world, you will share in all his glory. (Col 3, NLT)

    The lyrics quote the wide old man telling others how to finish strong.

    I was glued to my TV when it looked like he looked at me and said
    “Best start putting first things first.”
    Cause when your hourglass runs out of sand
    You can’t flip it over and start again
    Take every breath God gives you for what it’s worth

    The songwriter is correct. We have a pre-determined number of grains in the hourglass so I choose today to live in the moment in grace and freedom. Every breath is a gift even on the toughest days. Enjoy today. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not promised.

    In no time at all on the eternity clock I will be with my Lord and Savior. I will be home. For my fellow sojourners I pray that you will trust that truth. You may face storms and deep valleys along the way. The secret to life? Trust a God who is trustworthy. And one more thing.

    Don’t blink. His blessings are all around you.

  • God Doesn’t Punish

    One of my favorite lessons from Stay came while rescued Lab Maggie and I traversed the usual path. She sniffed and I listened to a podcast as we paced briskly through a Texas morning. She spotted something and moved toward the curb. My eye caught something at the same time, and I jerked violently on her leash to pull her toward me.

    She looked surprised, puzzled at what she had done wrong for such a harsh correction from me. The truth was that she hadn’t done anything wrong. Some knucklehead had shattered a beer bottle and a jagged piece was right in her path. She could have been seriously cut by the razor-sharp glass. I was thankful I had spotted it, but I could see that my action confused Maggie. I needed to assure her that my unexpected reaction was not punitive but entirely out of concern for her.

    I immediately dropped down to my knee, scratched Maggie’s ears, and verbally praised her. “It’s okay, girl. It’s okay.” 

    I was glad that she perked up immediately. Her uncertainty vanished, her drooping tail began to wag, and her beautiful eyes brightened again. She understood we were good. It was another lesson for me to ponder. 

    How many times have I responded in confusion and hurt when God gently or not so gently pulled me off a path of destruction when I had no idea what He was doing? Instead of trusting God I start second-guessing when God throws me a curve. I get out the transgression magnifying glass to detect which sin might have caused God to withdraw His favor from me. 

    Pastor Tullian Tchividjian answered my question with this insight.

    “Until we see God-sent storms as interventions and not punishments, we’ll never get better, we’ll only get bitter. Some difficult circumstances you’re facing right now may well be a God-sent storm of mercy intended to be his intervention in your life.”

    Precisely. God sees the jagged glass that I am about to step on and He pulls me back in love. The problem isn’t with Him; it’s my response to the correction. I am still learning to trust that God loves me no matter what my circumstances might look like.

    In the New Living Translation the passage heading for the first twelve verses in Hebrews 12 is spot on: “God’s Discipline Proves His Love.”

    For too many years I thought God’s corrective actions were punishment that proved His displeasure, when in actuality that discipline proved His love. 

    Have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children? He said, 

    “My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when he corrects you.

    For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”

    As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father?  If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all. Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever?

    For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

    Hebrews 12:5-11

    Even as a self-confessed imperfect father (corroborating evidence available from all three sons), I distinctly remember that I disciplined my children so they would grow up to be honest, kind, and loving. I didn’t want to make their lives miserable, stick it to them, or make them sad. On the contrary, I wanted them to learn how to live joyfully and well. If a flawed earthly father can have that heartfelt desire, how much more does my heavenly Father desire for my growth and good? It is all in understanding the motive behind the action.

    What does it mean that God administers His discipline in the realm of grace? It means that all His teaching, training, and discipline are administered in love and for our spiritual welfare. It means that God is never angry with us, though He is often grieved at our sins. It means He does not condemn us or count our sins against us. All that He does in us and to us is done on the basis of unmerited favor.

    I’m taking Maggie’s response to heart. When she looked at her master and saw that she was okay she relaxed, turned, and kept on walking. The journey continues for both of us.

  • Bring a “To Go” Box to Church

    Bring a “To Go” Box to Church

    I am a big fan of restaurant to go boxes. When I am full I can pack up the leftovers and be nourished again later. Recently I have adopted the “to go box” strategy when I go to church.

    I very intentionally pray for something I can pack away and take home that will nourish me spiritually and emotionally for the rest of the week. It is fascinating how God has honored that prayer by giving me something to put in my spiritual to go box each week.

    This week my to go box got filled during adult Bible class. We are going through the Old Testament book of 1st Samuel and the story of Hannah was discussed.

    Hannah was the wife of Elkanah who was married to a second wife named Peninnah. Elkanah seemed to emotionally favor Hannah but there was a problem. She was unable to bear children. That was a crushing burden to bear and especially when Peninnah openly taunted Hannah for being barren. Some thought that not being able to bear a child meant God was punishing that women for some sin. You can only imagine the hurtfulness of the comments from Peninnah.

    The story of Hannah is so rich and full of things to put in the to go box. The fact that Hannah did not quit worshiping and going to the Temple in spite of her circumstances is amazing. Even as she went to the Tabernacle Penninah would taunt her. How many Christians quit going to church in much less stressful settings? But she persevered.

    Hannah also recognized that she could not change things herself. While the text clearly stated that she was saddened by Penninah’s ugly comments there is no record of her responding in kind. Instead Hannah trusted God to hear her cries. Finally she reached a point of desperation that she channeled into dependence on God.

    After a sacrificial meal at Shiloh she left and went to pray because she was too upset to eat. Eli the priest was stationed in his customary spot by the entrance of the Tabernacle. He apparently had a front row seat to watch Hannah’s anguished prayer. She begged God to give her a son and promised to give that child back to the service of the Lord. Hannah poured out her heart and feelings to God with such deep emotions that Eli thought she must be drinking. In fact the text records that the Priest told her to throw away her wine!

    I think I might have gotten a bit defensive (okay, a lot defensive) if a religious leader accused me of being a drunk when I was honestly pouring out my heart to God. But once again Hannah showed grace.

    15 But Hannah replied, “Not so, my lord! I am a woman under a great deal of stress. I haven’t drunk wine or beer. But I have poured out my soul before the Lord. 16 Don’t consider your servant a wicked woman. It’s just that, to this point, I have spoken from my deep pain and anguish.”

    17 Eli replied, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant the request that you have asked of him.” 18 She said, “May I, your servant, find favor in your sight.” So the woman went her way and got something to eat. Her face no longer looked sad.[

    Hannah prayed. She asked God to intervene. She trusted Him to hear her. But she not know if that request would be granted. She had years and years of sorrow weighing down her soul.

    What I packed in my “to go box” this week was Hannah’s response. She had poured out her heart. She trusted God. She decided that only He could change her situation and she had communicated honestly. After that moment of complete transparency Hannah recognized she had done all she could. She went back and began to eat again. And Scripture says her face no longer looked sad.

    There are many things I ask of God. Sometimes I ask with great anguish for those prayers to be answered the way I am asking. Hannah showed me a great response. When I honestly pray and lay those requests at the altar I can walk away with my face not showing sadness but gratitude for a God who listens. John writes these words.

    And this is the confidence that we have before him: that whenever we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. (1 John 5:14, NET)

    Hannah’s faith was rewarded with a son named Samuel. God heard her petition. I am convinced He hears my petitions and especially when I tear down the walls of self-dependence. My desire may not be His will but I believe with all of my heart that God hears me and He will answer.

    Here are the contents of my to go box this week.

    1. Bring my requests to God with honesty.
    2. Leave them at the altar with a trusting heart.
    3. Walk away with a happy countenance knowing God can be trusted to hear and answer according to His will.

    Sometimes the answer is not what I want. But here is what I have learned in five decades of following Jesus. He is faithful.

    So I am asking you to take your to go box to church next week. I would love to hear what you pack in there!

  • A Life Lesson from My Labrador

    A Life Lesson from My Labrador

    One of the most valuable spiritual lessons from my rescued Labrador Hannah was the genesis of my book Stay.

    I had just stumbled through the back door from an all-night flight in the spring of 2011 when I noticed something was amiss with Hannah. Normally she would celebrate my arrival with a wild, exuberant, spinning dance accompanied by a vibrating, thumping tail. This time, her greeting was subdued, her gait slow, and her soulful eyes dull. 

    Joni and I immediately knew that something was wrong. Even though she seemed slightly better as the day wore on, we made an appointment with the vet just to make sure. 

    A suspicious growth on her spleen and fluid in her stomach signaled a grim prognosis. On Monday morning, we went to a specialist who confirmed the diagnosis. Dr. Carmenn Woolley explained the sad options we faced. Hannah had a splenic tumor which, given her age, would likely be malignant. 

    Our choices were less than optimal. Without surgery, Hannah’s tumor would rupture and bleed out and she would likely die within days or even sooner. With the surgery, she would still face an uncertain future, especially if the tumor was malignant. We could be talking a matter of weeks. The surgery was very expensive with no guarantees. 

    Still, a recent tax refund had given us the rare luxury of money to spend as we wished. Joni had a list of projects far more extensive than the refund would cover, and she had been trying to decide which project topped the list. That night we discussed the new reality. We could just try to keep our canine friend comfortable, or we could use the refund for Hannah’s surgery and give her a fighting chance. 

    Two days later, I picked her up from the Lake Ray Hubbard Emergency Pet Care Center after a successful surgery. So much for the new furniture, house painting, or landscaping. In place of those things, we got a dog friend with a twelve-inch incision on her belly and the hope of some sweet time to say good-bye. 

    Even after surgery, Hannah’s diagnosis was ominous. Splenic hemangiosarcoma. It was a horrible-sounding disease with an even worse prognosis. Without chemotherapy, the survival predictions were nineteen to sixty days. Six months would be a miracle. Dr. Woolley showed great compassion as tears welled in my eyes and spilled down my cheeks. The doctor’s eyes grew misty as she shared one of the most painful duties of her job. She handed me a tissue, put her hand on my arm, and quietly said something. Since I was still reeling from the shock of everything that had happened so quickly, her words didn’t sink in until later.  

    “Hannah does not know she is sick. Dogs have no fear of death, so they live in the moment. Enjoy each moment that you have.” 

    I thought about that comment a lot in the days to come.

    Dogs have no fear of death so they live in the moment. Isn’t that a blueprint for how followers of Christ should live on a daily basis? I had been a Christian for more than thirty years and had not figured out such a succinct philosophy of living. Satan wants us to live in regret of the past and fear of the future, preventing us from contentment in the moment with our God and with those we love. 

    I began to learn that part of being content on the journey with Jesus is simply trusting Him one day at a time. You can’t live in regret of the past. It is forgiven. You can’t live in fear of the future. It is in God’s hands. Without regret or fear you are free to live in the moment. Or as C. S. Lewis put it, “Where, except in the present, can the Eternal be met?”

    Jesus proclaimed that exact message in the Gospel of Matthew.

    “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”

    Matthew 6:25-27

    It was true. Worrying would not add a single moment to my life or my sweet canine friend. The treatment gave us many months of extra time. And I began the journey of living in the moment thanks to the example of Hannah.

    It is now my daily pursuit to trust God and savor each precious day.

  • What Are My Priorities?

    What Are My Priorities?

    I have been doing this church thing for a lot of years. I have sung hundreds of songs over the five decades or so that I have been a follower of Jesus. Some songs have great meaning to me. Some lyrics moved me to deep worship of God. Some times I really meant what I was singing. Other times I was singing through the motions while thinking about lunch and when the kick off was going to happen.

    Sometimes a song would make me really squirm.  One song in that category was recorded by the legendary George Beverly Shea in 1932.  The words were from a poem written by Mrs.Rhea Miller in 1922. Shea recalled the moment.

    At the age of twenty-three, I was living at home with my parents, continuing to work at Mutual Life Insurance and studying voice. Going to the piano one Sunday morning, I found a poem waiting for me there. I recognized my mother’s handwriting. She had copied the words of a poem by Mrs. Rhea F. Miller, knowing that I would read the beautiful message, which speaks of choice. As I read these precious words:

        I’d rather have Jesus than men’s applause.
        I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause.

    I found myself singing the words in a melody that expressed the feelings of my heart.”

    Thanks to Mr.Shea I found myself going through a rather uncomfortable self-examination today.

    I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold;
    I’d rather be His than have riches untold;


    What a timely verse for times like these. As I watch my investment worth dwindle can I really say that I would rather have Jesus than silver or gold? Maybe our economy will make that decision for me.

    What would I have said if I was the young rich man described in Matthew? Here is the text from The Message.

    Another day, a man stopped Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”  Jesus said, “Why do you question me about what’s good? God is the One who is good. If you want to enter the life of God, just do what he tells you.”

     The man asked, “What in particular?”

     Jesus said, “Don’t murder, don’t commit adultery, don’t steal, don’t lie, honor your father and mother, and love your neighbor as you do yourself.” The young man said, “I’ve done all that. What’s left?”

    His response has always surprised me. That young man thought he was doing just fine. And then Jesus exposed his heart.

     “If you want to give it all you’ve got,” Jesus replied, “go sell your possessions; give everything to the poor. All your wealth will then be in heaven. Then come follow me.”

    That was the last thing the young man expected to hear. And so, crest-fallen, he walked away. He was holding on tight to a lot of things, and he couldn’t bear to let go.

    I have held on tight to a lot of things. As I get older I wonder why.

     As he watched him go, Jesus told his disciples, “Do you have any idea how difficult it is for the rich to enter God’s kingdom? Let me tell you, it’s easier to gallop a camel through a needle’s eye than for the rich to enter God’s kingdom.”

     The disciples were staggered. “Then who has any chance at all?”

     Jesus looked hard at them and said, “No chance at all if you think you can pull it off yourself. Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it.” 

    That I can do. I can trust God. I have no choice because I have a long and spectacular track record of not being able to live this journey on my own ability. The song continues.

    I’d rather have Jesus than men’s applause;
    I’d rather be faithful to His dear cause;
    I’d rather have Jesus than world-wide fame,
    I’d rather be true to His holy name.

    Given the sales of my books I am pretty safe from the world-wide fame snare. But I do crave men’s applause if I am not careful. 

    He’s all that my hungering spirit needs,
    I’d rather have Jesus and let Him lead. 

    Perhaps the uncertainty in the world will cause all of us to evaluate our dependence on Christ. I hope that I will continue to grow in my desire to echo Paul and his words to the Phillipians.

    “What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ.”

    So can I sing the words of this classic hymn and mean it? God’s continuing faithfulness makes it possible.

  • Finding Peace in Dark Valleys

    Finding Peace in Dark Valleys

    No one gets through this journey unscathed. We will all face sadness, struggles, worry, sickness, and death. When I face trials I default to a song titled “Hold Me Jesus” from Rich Mullins. He is with Jesus now but Rich Mullins’s ability to capture our faith journey in lyric form was remarkable.

    Well, sometimes my life
    Just don’t make sense at all
    When the mountains look so big
    And my faith just seems so small

    Right now I am in a pretty good place in my life and journey with Jesus. But a heartbreaking number of my friends and loved ones are going through agonizing struggles and can relate completely to those lyrics. Rich Mullen’s words do not exaggerate the pain.

    And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
    It’s so hot inside my soul
    I swear there must be blisters on my heart

    I used to respond to troubles by thinking it must be my fault somehow. God must not be pleased with me. I would decide I had to do something to bolster my faith. I needed to read more verses or do a study or pray more or believe more. But the answer was far more simple and the chorus by Mullins nails it. All I needed was to rest in the love of God.

    So hold me Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf
    You have been King of my glory
    Won’t You be my Prince of Peace

    I needed to quit flailing and trying so darn hard to be righteous. Hold me Jesus. Won’t you be my Prince of Peace? In those moments this prayer is simple and profound.

    “God…would you love me today?”

    And He does. I don’t have to “do stuff” for God to earn His favor and receive His love and peace. For those of us “doers” who absolutely must do something here is your homework assignment.

    1. Believe what God says is true about you.

    That’s it. That is your assignment and it may not be as easy as it looks in print. Believe you are forgiven. Believe you are loved. Believe you are His child. Believe you are adopted. Believe you are redeemed. Believe you are a new creation.

    I have made it so stinkin’ complicated and performance based for so many years. When I trust what God says about me I am humbled. I worship. Believing how my Father sees me causes me to obey out of gratitude and not teeth gritting compliance.

    Why did I fight this amazing grace and His unconditional love? Well, Rich Mullins nails that too.

    Surrender don’t come natural to me
    I’d rather fight You for something
    I don’t really want
    Than to take what You give that I need
    And I’ve beat my head against so many walls
    Now I’m falling down, I’m falling on my knees

    That was me. Beating my head against a performance wall instead of surrendering to the extravagant gift of grace and freedom. Next time you are flailing and striving to please God would you try this simple request?

    “Jesus…would you love me today?” He has promised to be there.

    “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28, NLT)

    Hold me Jesus. I want to rest in your love today.