Charisa Stories

Category: Uncategorized

  • I’m Gonna Miss You My Friend

    I’m Gonna Miss You My Friend

    The title is from the chorus of a song by Toby Keith written after his friend Wayman Tisdale passed away. The lyrics hit my heart when I left the hospital after visiting my dear friend Chris Taylor. His time is near and it hurt so much to see his decline.

    But it was still a sweet time to tell my friend I love him. Over the years he has made me laugh so many times. We have shared heartaches. Wonderful memories that made me smile. Chris and I were dangerous together. You could count on the sarcasm train coming down the tracks full speed anytime we convened.

    But Chris is also an incredibly kind man who served others for many years as a Wylie, Texas Police officer and dedicated follower of Jesus. One of his sayings will stick with me until my time comes. Chris always said this about serving others.

    “If I can help someone I don’t need to think or pray about it. I just do it.”

    We can use love one another as a slogan too often without feet and hands. But Chris lived that philosophy of being there to help others without fanfare.

    One of the lyrics from Toby Keith’s song fits beautifully here.

    You showed me how I am supposed to live
    Now you showed me how to die

    That is one of the most powerful things I have seen over and over in the lives of dedicated followers of Jesus. They pass with confidence and peace in their next destination. Even through the pain and tears those flashes of his wonderful humor were present. The very real hope in that room was this promise from Jesus.

    “Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you?
    (John 14, NLT)

    Soon my friend Chris will experience that glorious promise. Toby Keith says it perfectly in the chorus of his song “Crying For Me”.

    I’m going to miss that smile
    I’m going to miss you my friend
    Even though it hurts the way it ended up
    I’d do it all again

    My friend looked weak as I leaned over to give him a hug. I did not expect what I received. I got a bear hug that I would not have believed he was capable of giving. I will never forget that moment. When I left I said a very intentional thing that I believe with all of my heart.

    “See you later.”

    I completely trust that promise of eternity given to us by the finished work of Jesus.

    So I will miss my friend but once again I defer to Toby Keith.

    I’m not crying’ cause I feel so sorry for you
    I am crying’ for me

    I am crying for Chris’s beautiful family. For his dear friends and colleagues. For me. But I know on the scale of eternity my time is also very near. I cling to the promise of eternity today and I look forward to that reunion in heaven.

  • The Most Dangerous Theft of All?

    The Most Dangerous Theft of All?

    Identity theft is a huge problem. It is one of the fastest growing crimes in the United States and recent stats suggest that as many as 15 million cases occurred in the past year. The rise of identity theft has produced a number of companies that protect you from criminals that might steal your good name and credit rating. A few years ago one of my card numbers was compromised and some low life was merrily buying electronic gear on my tab in Malaysia. Fortunately that was fairly easily resolved since I could prove I was safely hunkered down in North Texas when the purchases were made.

    It occurred to me that another identity theft occurs in the lives of Christians all the time and there seems to be very little uproar about it. I pondered if I could start a company to protect followers of Jesus from this serious and sometimes tragic crime. The crime is Christian identity theft. Any follower of Jesus has the potential to fall victim. The target of this scam is the truth found in the Second Letter to the Church at Corinth.

    This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! (2nd Corinthians, 5:17)

    Because of Christ you have a new identity. You are righteous because of Him and not because of trying to do more right “stuff”. You are a saint and there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus. It is a liberating and joyous message. But there is a problem. Satan hates that message of hope and change. And so he goes about trying to “steal’ our identity in Christ. I am afraid we make it all too easy because we find it difficult to really trust that we are changed. When we fail the old messages are instantly cued and start playing loudly.

    You will never change.
    You always do that.
    I can’t believe you did that again.
    What is wrong with you?
    And then you start blaming yourself and thinking you would not be having these problems if you were (pick one or more):

    1. Reading God’s Word more faithfully
    2. Praying more fervently
    3. Loving and serving others more consistently
    4. Telling others about Jesus
    5. Giving more time or money to the church

    All of those things on that list are good and valuable. But that list is not what makes you righteous. You are righteous because of Christ. Period. When you trust that and believe that you have a new identity then the list above becomes a grateful desire and not a begrudging obligation to try and be better. All of the guilt and shame and sin that used to define you is no longer true. That old life is gone. You are a new creation. New life has begun. All of those accusations that Satan (and others who are quite happy to help) hurl your way are no longer true about you.

    My life was changed over 50 years ago when I decided to trust Jesus as my Lord and Savior. It has just been in the past twelve years that I have begun to fully understand who I am in Christ and that I live my life daily in grace. The ministry Trueface changed my view on identity and this statement from my friend John Lynch rocked my world.

    If you are a Christian, God is not interested in changing you. That has already happened. You were changed when you trusted Christ. You were imputed with His righteousness. Your very spiritual DNA was rewritten and you became a new person. So the change happened right away. God is now interested in maturing you into what is already true about you.

    That has been my journey for the past several years. When the accuser starts I simply remind myself that those things are no longer true about me. I have a new identity. I focus on what is true about me.

    Protect your identity in Christ with even more fervor than you protect your financial identity. Look in the mirror each day and remind yourself of these things.

    My identity is in Christ.
    I am a new person.
    God sees me as a saint.
    I am righteous because of Christ.
    I am changed. That has already happened and that is what is true about me.


    A new life has begun. Live it joyfully and without condemnation. That is your identity. Guard it zealously.

  • Forgiveness Does Not Appear To Be An Option

    Forgiveness Does Not Appear To Be An Option

    I think forgiveness is the most challenging thing Jesus commands us to do. I have tried to argue with God about forgiveness and whether someone “deserves” mercy.

    Scripture can be so annoying sometimes. Paul threw down an incredible statement to the Ephesian church.

    Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
    (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)

    That is a very tall order and one that is impossible to do without remembering how much I have been forgiven. If you say something nasty about me and ask for forgiveness, I will almost certainly grant it. If you do it again and ask forgiveness, I will probably forgive you. If you do the same thing again and ask forgiveness, I will most likely respond ungraciously and ask you to “prove” you are sorry.

    Yet that illustration is exactly what I do in my relationship with God every day. I have asked Him to forgive the same sin dozens, even hundreds of times. Still His Word tells me I am forgiven and He loves me just the same as the first time I confessed that sin. That is how God has forgiven me through Christ. I should respond accordingly, forgiving each and every offense out of profound gratitude. Do you see any way around the obvious command to forgive? Me either.

    Bottom line: we are commanded to forgive as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness may well be the missing ingredient to the healing of most relationships. Forgive the one who wounded you. Forgive yourself and seek forgiveness if you are the one who wounded. Perhaps your efforts will not result in reconciliation. That is sad but ultimately okay. What if the other person does not deserve to be forgiven? Consider Jesus as He looked down in agony from the cross.

    Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice. (Luke 23:34, NLT)

    I can say with complete confidence that I have not endured the level of wounds, betrayal, mocking, and abuse that Jesus experienced. Yet He could look at those evil perpetrators and ask His Father to forgive them. That gives me some perspective. Perhaps my situations are forgivable, with His help and only with His help.

    I have spent a lot of unhappy moments not enjoying the freedom the Lord intended because I did not want to forgive someone who hurt me. I grieve to think of how I have stubbornly refused to forgive others for real and/or perceived slights over the years. I can imagine Jesus looking at me with sadness (not condemnation) because I have not fully comprehended the magnitude of the debt that has been erased from my account because of Him. I can hear Him saying,

    “Dave, when you choose to hold onto bitterness, you shortchange yourself on joy and peace.”

    If I cannot forgive, I have forgotten or never comprehended how much I have been forgiven.

    Taken from Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace.

    How quickly I forget. I forget how much I have been forgiven. I forget how much I am loved by Jesus. I forget that I am a brand new creation. I forget I am righteous because of the finished  work of Christ. I forget that there is no condemnation in Christ. I forget that I am a beloved child of God and He is for me. I forget that He has my back and He has me in His hand forever. I am forgetful.

    But thank God He does not forget His promises. More than anything I need to remember that today.

  • My Thoughts and Prayers About Thoughts and Prayers

    My Thoughts and Prayers About Thoughts and Prayers

    One of the social media trends after a tragedy or sad event is to attack people of faith for offering “thoughts and prayers”. These posters assume that anyone expressing those sentiments don’t really care about solutions to whatever problem is being addressed. We have lost the ability to recognize two things can be true at once. I may get mocked and/or canceled by some for the following statement.
    I honestly believe I can desire cultural change while praying for ultimate hope available through Christ. I don’t force that on others. I try to live it although I know I do that imperfectly. That is the power of grace. I don’t have to be perfect for God to use me to love others. So there is the challenge for Christians in this season. How can we love those who assign terrible motives to what may be a completely sincere response? We start by seeing if anything in the criticism is valid.

    I spent 40 years in television production trucks so rough language doesn’t impact me much. But I have to admit the language and anger directed toward Christians who express “thoughts and prayers” is stunning. It is easy to dismiss such vulgar statements with defensiveness and anger. I have learned that there are many ways to address criticism. For too many years my preferred method was outright dismissal with a side of disdain.

    I have been working on a project with former Pittsburgh Pirates manager Clint Hurdle. We discussed the criticism that both of us received in our careers. His was much more public than mine but I could at least relate. Clint said he learned to honestly evaluate even the ugliest criticism. He knew he could toss much of it away because he had evaluated his heart and motives in making a decision. But he also learned that sometimes there is a valid critique hiding in the vitriol. That bit of honest criticism is what he prayerfully took away while discarding the rest. So is there a lesson there for followers of Jesus?

    I think we can ask for God’s grace towards those who are judgmental and unkind. Believe me, I know that is not easy and not possible apart from His grace. I don’t mean the next statement to be condescending to those who do not share my faith because I have been on both sides. If I did not have the hope that there is more than this existence I would likely be just as frustrated and angry.

    So if my faith is real I need to back up, show kindness, and continue to love those who might not show those same reactions toward me.

    As for finding some valid criticism in the vitriol I will throw this out for you to “think and pray” about. When we type that we are sending “thoughts and prayers” I believe that Christians must also be looking for ways to show love through our actions. Thoughts and prayers need hands and feet displaying the love of Christ to have eternal impact.

    It is hard to spend much time in the New Testament and not realize our challenge for Christians toward those hurting, in need, and devoid of hope. Here is a very small sample: 

    If anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him? (1 John 3:17 , ESV)

    What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.
    (James 2:14-17, ESV)

    Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Philippians 2:4 , ESV)

    The charge of hypocrisy leveled at the church has a lot to do with our obsession with sin management over living a life of kindness, grace, and service. If I am not living out of grace, then Jesus’ arms aren’t reaching as far as they could through me. Loving one another is clearly step one. The time to start making that a priority is today.

    So I am absolutely fine with your sincere expression of thoughts and prayers when people are hurting. But I am challenging myself and you to be willing to be the hands and feet that reflect the love of Christ. Don’t focus on the anger of those who don’t share your hope. Focus on the One who has given you hope in this challenging season and be a light in the darkness.

  • Are You Doing Enough for Jesus?

    Are You Doing Enough for Jesus?

    I grew up in legalism. We were taught accurately that you were saved by grace. And then it went South. We then were taught that sanctification came through grit. You had to work hard to stay in good standing with God. I used to laugh at this bumper sticker.

    “Jesus is coming soon. Look busy.”

    The application of that theology was anything but amusing. To grow in faith I had to do more. Try harder. Pray more. Read the Bible more. Have more devotional time. Stay busy for God and you will grow in faith. All of those things are good when properly utilized. But there is a problem in self-effort as your plan for sanctification. Nowhere in Scripture will you find this command.

    Be busy and know that I am God.

    Our busyness does not please God. Our faith pleases Him. We can’t have faith and trust in someone we are too busy to know intimately. David wrote this timeless truth in Psalm 46.


    Be still, and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)

    Growing in faith is not about scurrying about to do more for Jesus. We are saved by grace and we grow more like Jesus by abiding in His grace.

    My personal belief is that one of the biggest and most damaging mistakes that the church makes with new believers is not teaching clearly and continually what happens when you put your faith in Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord. It seems that we too often get young Christians immediately into studies and activities. We subtly (or in my own experience, not so subtly) program them to believe that growth is about doing more right things. That righteousness somehow requires busyness for Jesus. We imply that change can only happen when you are trying hard and being disciplined for God.

    The truth is that a dramatic change has already happened when you make that faith commitment to follow Jesus. Let’s just hit the highlights. Scripture tells you that you now have a new identity. You are literally a new creation. You have imputed righteousness of Christ. That is a nice theological term that simply means that God sees you as righteous because of your relationship with Jesus. That’s it. Nothing you have done or ever will do earns that righteousness. It is a gift of grace.

    You have everything you need to grow in Christ at the moment you put your faith in Him. Yet I spent years looking for the keys to growing in faith. Finally I realized I had the keys in my pocket from day one. I was changed completely when I trusted Christ. The trick is living out of that truth. Instead of feeling shame when I fall short I now see a different picture.

    I see Jesus putting His arm around me and explaining that I have been changed. I see Him telling me that my sins are completely forgiven. I see Him explaining to me that all of those things that used to be true about me are no longer true. That no matter what the Accuser might say those things are dead and buried at the Cross. I see Jesus telling me that I have the Holy Spirit to comfort me and provide an unshakeable source of strength. That I don’t have to grit my teeth and try harder to win favor and please Him. That sin does not have power over me anymore. That if I trust Him and let God love me I will please Him. My faith and trust is what pleases Him.


    So let’s disabuse ourselves today of the notion that busyness is somehow related to godliness. My growth happens when I live out of what Jesus has already done instead of worrying about what I need to do to earn His favor. I think that is why Jesus can say this in the Gospel of Matthew.

    “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30, NLT)

    That is my prayer for today. To let Jesus teach me with gentleness. To learn from His humility. And to find rest in Him.

  • Why Lord? Why me?

    Why Lord? Why me?

    Why me Lord? I suspect that most of us have cried out to God with that question. And I would also guess that approximately ninety-nine percent of the time we are asking God why some trial has come our way that we feel is undeserved.

    The same question has been asked throughout history. “Why me Lord? Why me?”

    A song by Kris Kristofferson cycled up on on my satellite radio today and reminded me of a better perspective. I have loved Kristofferson’s song “Why Me?” since I was a young believer and, if you do the math, you realize that I am not so young a believer anymore. The truth is I am still trying to apply the wisdom of these lyrics.

    Why me Lord, what have I ever done
    To deserve even one
    Of the pleasures I’ve known
    Tell me Lord, what did I ever done
    That was worth loving you
    Or the kindness you’ve shown

    So true. What have I done to deserve even one of His blessings? I did not deserve forgiveness. That was a gift of grace from a loving God. I did not deserve to be born in the United States into incredible comfort, religious freedom, and opportunity. I did not deserve to be born healthy when others live with chronic afflictions. Those things were blessings that I received without complaining to my Creator.

    The “why me Lord” question we so often ask should have an entirely different focus.

    Why me Lord? What have I done to deserve your blessing?

    It is true that some seem to suffer a disproportionate amount of affliction and difficulty. It doesn’t seem fair. The theology that faithful Christians will experience nonstop prosperity, perfect health, and green lights at every intersection is a lie from the pit of Hell. Suffering is a part of the process that God uses to refine our faith and ultimately to glorify Him.

    My high school basketball coach was a winner and a great teacher. I remember Coach Tom Cuppett yelling at me. A lot. It seemed I could never do anything right. We would run a play and the whistle would blow. “Burchett….what are you doing?” Then he would grab me and the other forwards and walk us through what was supposed to happen. After my senior season Coach Cuppett called me in to his office.

    “I have to let you in on something. Remember how I always yelled at you and walked you through the plays?” He asked.
    I responded with a smile. “Pretty hard to forget that you can’t do anything right.”
    “The truth is that a lot of the time it was Jimmy (not real name) who messed up and not you. He couldn’t take the criticism and you could. So I yelled at you and then grabbed him and walked him through the plays with you so he would learn without losing his confidence.”
    “It would have been nice to know why I was the target so often.”
    “I couldn’t tell you at the time. But I trusted you to keep going. And you did. Your ability to handle adversity made him and our team better.”

    The lesson never left. I trusted a good coach and accepted what I had to endure to achieve our goal of winning. Later I found out that I had gained honor in his eyes by trusting him even when things didn’t seem “fair”. How much more so can I trust a God who loved me enough to offer grace when I was completely without merit? What if that trial is given to me because God deems me able to remain steadfast and through that faithfulness others will be impacted for good? What if I get called into God’s office someday and find out that He gave me the gift of trials to reflect His glory and now my rewards will far exceed that temporary pain? If I can trust an earthly coach then I can certainly trust my Heavenly Father with all of me.

    Kristofferson writes about what many of us regret.

    Lord help me Jesus, I’ve wasted it so

    That is the amazing thing about our God of redemption and second chances. It is never too late to start trusting and living in His grace. It starts with believing your real identity. Henri Nouwen says it well.

    “You can deal with an enormous amount of success as well as an enormous amount of failure without losing your identity, because your identity is that you are the beloved. Long before your father and mother, your brothers and sisters, your teachers, your church, or any people touched you in a loving as well as in a wounding way-long before you were rejected by some person or praised by somebody else-that voice has been there always. “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” That love is there before you were born and will be there after you die.”

    Paul wrote this to the Church at Ephesus.

    Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son.He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.  (Ephesians 1, NLT)

    Believing that makes it possible to ask “why me” in a very different way.

  • How A High School Football Coach Taught Me To Live Before I Die 

    How A High School Football Coach Taught Me To Live Before I Die 

    At some point in our journey most people start thinking about leaving a legacy. For some the idea of leaving a legacy means accumulating wealth or property to give to the next generation. A family business can be a legacy that keeps a memory alive through the years. Prestige and power can be thought of as a legacy.

    In the winter of 2017 I became friends with Newton Texas high school football Coach W.T. Johnston. His story of courage and faith became the basis of my book “Between the White Lines“. For eighteen months the Johnston family embedded me in their lives and shared their story with unvarnished honesty. I had no idea how much that project and that relationship would influence me.

    I had thought now and then about my legacy. I had always factored my accomplishments into legacy. I had a long and satisfying television directing career. I was fortunate to win a few awards. But the fact is that the moment I stood up to leave that directing chair another person sat right down. The telecasts went on just fine without me. W.T. taught me that leaving a legacy was not about accomplishment. Perhaps the most emotional moment of my career happened after Johnston won an improbable second consecutive state title several months after doctors told him he would be dead. His interview on Fox Sports has been seen by millions and it helped shape how I plan to live the rest of my life. Here is a bit of that remarkable sideline moment.

    “We got together in August right before we started practicing and I told them I probably wouldn’t make it through the season. I was only given eight months to live in January. And I wanted them to be aware of what was going on. And then we got going and there was about two or three weeks during the season I didn’t think I was going to make it. And we talked about that.

    “I always told them this was the last lesson I was gonna teach them. I’ve been around these guys and their dads and their mothers since 1991. And I told them the last lesson I would ever teach them is how to live before you die, and where you put your strength and where you put your belief. The Lord has done so much for me. It’s unbelievable what Jesus has let me do and see through these kids. And I tell everybody—they don’t understand this—I’ve been given a great gift. I’ve been able to see how my life could affect people before I die. These guys, they’ve touched my life. It’s been a mutual thing. But I’ve been able to teach them a lesson that you don’t get to see most times.

    “Last night they were talking about wanting to win for me. I’ve had my time. This is their time. This is all for them. I told them to do it for their teammates, to do it for themselves. Because fifty years from now, this will be something special they’ll always remember.  I mean, they’ll remember me—if I’ve done right, a part of me is going to live in them and that’s what I’ve always thought—if I’ve done things right.”

    What a succinct and brilliant definition of leaving a legacy. If I’ve done things right a part of me is going to live in them.

    Leaving a legacy is not getting to the top of your profession. It is not being the most successful or the most wealthy. Billy Graham had a pretty good resume. It is estimated he spoke to over 200 million people in live audiences over sixty years. He wrote over thirty books. His television and radio programming reached millions more with the Gospel of Jesus. I would say that is a pretty powerful legacy. But here is how Graham defined the word.

    “The greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.”

    That is the legacy I hope to leave. Leaving a legacy is being kind to people who can do nothing for you. Leaving a legacy is being fair to everyone and not just the powerful and privileged. Leaving a legacy is making each person you engage feel important and valued. Leaving a legacy is serving selflessly with no expectation for reward. Leaving a legacy is loving your wife, children, friends, and neighbors with forgiveness, patience, humility, and grace. Leaving a legacy is modeling what it looks like to walk with Jesus faithfully through both triumph and tragedy.

    Here is a verse to start you on the path to leaving a “part of you” in the lives of others.

    Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or a place to stay. God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. (1 Peter 4:8-10, NLT)

    In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus outlined how to be light to a dark and hurting world. 

    “You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. (Matthew 5:14-16)

    That is how W.T. Johnston lived his life. My friend went to be with the Lord three years ago this month. He was one-hundred percent correct about his impact because a piece of his courage, strength, wisdom will live in me forever.

    Between the White Lines is an inspiring story of a great coach and how faith challenged and changed a town and team.