Charisa Stories

Tag: grace

  • God Doesn’t Punish

    One of my favorite lessons from Stay came while rescued Lab Maggie and I traversed the usual path. She sniffed and I listened to a podcast as we paced briskly through a Texas morning. She spotted something and moved toward the curb. My eye caught something at the same time, and I jerked violently on her leash to pull her toward me.

    She looked surprised, puzzled at what she had done wrong for such a harsh correction from me. The truth was that she hadn’t done anything wrong. Some knucklehead had shattered a beer bottle and a jagged piece was right in her path. She could have been seriously cut by the razor-sharp glass. I was thankful I had spotted it, but I could see that my action confused Maggie. I needed to assure her that my unexpected reaction was not punitive but entirely out of concern for her.

    I immediately dropped down to my knee, scratched Maggie’s ears, and verbally praised her. “It’s okay, girl. It’s okay.” 

    I was glad that she perked up immediately. Her uncertainty vanished, her drooping tail began to wag, and her beautiful eyes brightened again. She understood we were good. It was another lesson for me to ponder. 

    How many times have I responded in confusion and hurt when God gently or not so gently pulled me off a path of destruction when I had no idea what He was doing? Instead of trusting God I start second-guessing when God throws me a curve. I get out the transgression magnifying glass to detect which sin might have caused God to withdraw His favor from me. 

    Pastor Tullian Tchividjian answered my question with this insight.

    “Until we see God-sent storms as interventions and not punishments, we’ll never get better, we’ll only get bitter. Some difficult circumstances you’re facing right now may well be a God-sent storm of mercy intended to be his intervention in your life.”

    Precisely. God sees the jagged glass that I am about to step on and He pulls me back in love. The problem isn’t with Him; it’s my response to the correction. I am still learning to trust that God loves me no matter what my circumstances might look like.

    In the New Living Translation the passage heading for the first twelve verses in Hebrews 12 is spot on: “God’s Discipline Proves His Love.”

    For too many years I thought God’s corrective actions were punishment that proved His displeasure, when in actuality that discipline proved His love. 

    Have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children? He said, 

    “My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when he corrects you.

    For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”

    As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father?  If God doesn’t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all. Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever?

    For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

    Hebrews 12:5-11

    Even as a self-confessed imperfect father (corroborating evidence available from all three sons), I distinctly remember that I disciplined my children so they would grow up to be honest, kind, and loving. I didn’t want to make their lives miserable, stick it to them, or make them sad. On the contrary, I wanted them to learn how to live joyfully and well. If a flawed earthly father can have that heartfelt desire, how much more does my heavenly Father desire for my growth and good? It is all in understanding the motive behind the action.

    What does it mean that God administers His discipline in the realm of grace? It means that all His teaching, training, and discipline are administered in love and for our spiritual welfare. It means that God is never angry with us, though He is often grieved at our sins. It means He does not condemn us or count our sins against us. All that He does in us and to us is done on the basis of unmerited favor.

    I’m taking Maggie’s response to heart. When she looked at her master and saw that she was okay she relaxed, turned, and kept on walking. The journey continues for both of us.

  • The Next Jesus Revolution?

    I recently watched the movie Jesus Revolution.

    I was deeply moved by the main theme of the movie. It doesn’t matter how much a particular group offends your personal standards of behavior and upsets your judgemental apple cart. We, as followers of Jesus, have been commanded to love others and to share the hope we have in Him.

    “So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.” (John 13:34, NLT)

    Not suggested.

    Commanded.

    I grew up in a church that was much like the lukewarm assembly that Pastor Chuck Smith shepherded in this story. The congregants were set in their ways and had no patience with these long-haired hippies committing heinous sins like drug use, unmarried sex, and angry protests against the government. It was true that those actions violated God’s standards for believers. Too many in the church held these young people to standards that were proclaimed for Christians and not for those who still needed to find Jesus. What frustrated me in that season of life were these self-righteous churchgoers who had tons of patience with their own sins of hypocrisy, gossip, and not caring about the souls of these hippies.

    The story of the Jesus Revolution is powerful. Many of these young people were desperately looking for identity, purpose, and self-esteem in all the wrong places. When they discovered that Jesus offered the things they were looking for it caused a revival that swept Southern California and the rest of the country. I personally know a woman who came to know Jesus in that tent at Calvary Chapel and was baptized at Pirates Cove in the Pacific Ocean. She is still a devoted follower of Jesus. Her testimony is one of millions that attest to the reality of that spiritual movement.

    Pastor Chuck Smith was moved by the passion of the young people who had moved from drugs and other sinful pursuits to find peace and hope in Jesus. He allowed these “hippies” to attend his church much to the horror of the uptight congregation. Chuck Smith followed the command of Jesus. He loved these unlikely new members.

    I left the theater feeling uplifted and convicted at the same time. I wondered if the Holy Spirit was showing me how the church today is judging young people and not actively caring about sharing the love of Jesus with them. At the risk of getting canceled, I hear often how angry and judgmental Christians can be toward young people trying to figure out cultural issues like gender, historical interpretations, and losing the ability to communicate because everything is offensive to them.

    I kept thinking about how God used a small movement in Southern California to show what the power of Jesus can do in a life that is confused. Are we missing the chance to make a difference by not being accepting of young people who are pursuing the same things the 1970’s hippies were trying to find? Identity. Purpose. Self-esteem. Hope.

    So I am asking myself these questions. Do I care about the souls of these young people going down paths that I might think are crazy? Do I pray for them? Am I willing to welcome them into my fellowship? Do I think that Jesus loves everyone no matter how much I might disagree with their current philosophical positions? I looked at those angry churchgoers demanding that the hippies be sent away and wonder if we are doing the same thing with the younger generation today.

    God does not ignore sin. God will judge all of our sins. But God is always mercifully seeking sinners. Paul said it so perfectly.

    But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. (Romans 5:8, NLT)

    Every single one of us was doing things that violated the holy standards of God. But His patience and gentle persistence brought us into His fellowship through Christ. We can’t let sins that offend us more than our particular sins affect our heart for reaching out to others with the Good News of the Gospel.

    There is a scene in The Jesus Revolution where there is clear division in the room. On one side were the traditional conservative church goers wearing suits and dresses. The other side was filled with barefoot young people wearing tie-dyed clothes, jeans, and flowers. At one point an angry older man stood up and demanded that control to be returned to the people who supported the church financially. Pastor Chuck Smith refused. He led a group of people out of the church. On his way out the man turned and looked at an older gentleman with a look of expectation that he would join them. The old man stood up and began to walk. All eyes were on him as he slowly moved out of his pew. He walked over to the hippie section and settled in with them as the others slammed the door on their way out.

    I want to be that guy. The one who cares about people different from me. The one who is willing to move out of my comfort zone to share the grace and love of Jesus.

    Today there are signs that a new revival is sweeping through the younger generation. I want to be a cheerleader and prayer warrior for that movement. God is creative and I don’t want to get in His way.

  • Where Am I?


    This floor sticker was amusing but not particularly helpful. It did make me remember how long I stumbled around trying to figure out where I was on my spiritual journey. Was I going to Heaven? Was I a good, bad, or indifferent Christian? Was I loved by God? Was I significant? The question of where I was as a follower of Christ and who I was as a person consumed and confused me.

    The always present Enemy answered the questions above on a regular basis. Maybe not going to Heaven. Definitely a bad Christian. Not really loved or bad things wouldn’t happen to you. Totally insignificant. The following is a little excerpt on this topic from my book Waking Up Slowly.

    For too many years I believed the accusations, without considering the question that Philip Yancey asks.

    Sociologists have a theory of the looking-glass self: you become what the most important person in your life (wife, father, boss, etc.) thinks you are. How would my life change if I truly believed the Bible’s astounding words about God’s love for me, if I looked in the mirror and saw what God sees?

    I am learning to look into the mirror and see someone that I accept by faith and not by my feelings. I see a saint. That’s right. Many (maybe most) of Satan’s accusations are true. But what I now see is a man who is a saint. I found forty references to saints in Paul’s writings in the English Standard Version. From his additional descriptions, I am pretty sure that the recipients of his letters were not always behaving like saints. They were saints because of Christ, and not by meticulously following the law.

    God sees those who trust Jesus as righteous, no matter how many accusations are thrown at them. Amazing.

    All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ. Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ.

    (Ephesians 1:3-5, NLT)

    That is my (and your) identity as a follower of Jesus. Holy and without fault in His eyes. I will be accused again, probably sooner than later. But I am learning to simply say this to myself: “That is not who I am anymore. I am holy because of Christ.”

    When I forget that truth, I allow doubt, confusion, shame, and sadness to creep in. Not leaning on the finished work of Jesus as my strength and identity sets me up for a frustrating masquerade of faith.

    There may be no element more important to living fully in the moment with God than accepting that I am loved by Him right now just as I am. That is so counterintuitive to how “love” so often works in my experience. I have talked with too many men who justify their extramarital relationships by saying they deserve more than their current marriage provides. It always hurts my heart because those they hurt deeply do not deserve to be wounded by betrayal. I try to never forget what I said on that July day more than forty years ago to my bride. I made vows to Joni Lynn Banks before God. I did not sign a contract with escape clauses based on my happiness at any given point in time.

    The world speaks a different love language. “I will love you while you are attractive.” “I will love you when you make me happy.” “I will love you when you do what I ask you to do.” Human love almost always includes conditional elements. That is not God’s love.

    The Lord your God is in your midst; he is a warrior who can deliver.
    He takes great delight in you; he renews you by his love; he shouts for joy over you.
    (Zephaniah 3:17, NET)

    The attributes of God’s love are mind boggling. It is personal. You and I can relate to God the Creator of the universe as our Father. Think about that. I mean really think about that. I am conditioned to believe that if something seems too good to be true, then I am being deceived. That is what Satan would have me believe. But the stunning radicality of grace is that what seems to be too good to be true is more true than I can imagine.

    (Reprinted with permission of Tyndale Publishing, All Rights Reserved)

    So where am I today? No matter what my physical location might be I have both feet firmly planted on the foundation of my identity in Christ. I am putting my full weight on His Grace. No matter where I am that is who I am! And it is a really peaceful place to be after all these years.

  • Things I Can’t Afford to Forget

    I am always saddened by the all out sprint to judgement of people and institutions that make mistakes. It often seems the harshest comments come from people who ought to tap the brakes before they go there. These are folks that have made their own mistakes. Often they were offered second chances. My initial response was self-righteous indignation because, let’s be honest, I am good at that.

    Eventually the quiet voice of the Spirit reminds me that I have also been that guy who is quick to judge. I am that guy who tries to argue with God about forgiveness and whether someone “deserves” mercy. A little snippet from my book Stay addressed this very issue after Paul threw down an incredible statement to the Ephesian church.

    Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
    (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)

    That is a very tall order and one that is impossible to do without remembering how much I have been forgiven. If you say something nasty about me and ask for forgiveness, I will almost certainly grant it. If you do it again and ask forgiveness, I will probably forgive you. If you do the same thing again and ask forgiveness, I will most likely respond ungraciously and ask you to “prove” you are sorry.

    Yet that illustration is exactly what I do in my relationship with God every day. I have asked Him to forgive the same sin dozens, even hundreds of times. Still His Word tells me I am forgiven and He loves me just the same as the first time I confessed that sin. That is how God has forgiven me through Christ. I should respond accordingly, forgiving each and every offense out of profound gratitude. Do you see any way around the obvious command to forgive? Me either.

    Bottom line: we are commanded to forgive as we have been forgiven. Forgiveness may well be the missing ingredient to the healing of most relationships. Forgive the one who wounded you. Forgive yourself and seek forgiveness if you are the one who wounded. Perhaps your efforts will not result in reconciliation. That is sad but ultimately okay. What if the other person does not deserve to be forgiven? Consider Jesus as He looked down in agony from the cross.

    Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice. (Luke 23:34, NLT)

    I can say with complete confidence that I have not endured the level of wounds, betrayal, mocking, and abuse that Jesus experienced. Yet He could look at those evil perpetrators and ask His Father to forgive them. That gives me some perspective. Perhaps my situations are forgivable, with His help and only with His help.

    I have spent a lot of unhappy moments not enjoying the freedom the Lord intended because I did not want to forgive someone who hurt me. I grieve to think of how I have stubbornly refused to forgive others for real and/or perceived slights over the years. I can imagine Jesus looking at me with sadness (not condemnation) because I have not fully comprehended the magnitude of the debt that has been erased from my account because of Him. I can hear Him saying,

    “Dave, when you choose to hold onto bitterness, you shortchange yourself on joy and peace.”

    If I cannot forgive, I have forgotten or never comprehended how much I have been forgiven.

    Taken from Stay by Dave Burchett copyright © 2015. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.

    How quickly I forget. I forget how much I have been forgiven. I forget how much I am loved by Jesus. I forget that I am a brand new creation. I forget I am righteous because of the finished  work of Christ. I forget that there is no condemnation in Christ. I forget that I am a beloved child of God and He is for me. I forget that He has my back and He has me in His hand forever. I am forgetful.

    But thank God He does not forget His promises. More than anything I need to not forget that today.

  • You Can End Groundhog Day Faith

    You Can End Groundhog Day Faith

    Every year they rudely awaken Punxsutawney Phil long enough for the reluctant rodent to let us know if six more weeks of winter awaits. Phil always looks as happy as I do when when I am disturbed in the morning. Twenty-eight years ago a funny and underappreciated movie came on the scene. Groundhog Day told the story of a self-absorbed news reporter (redundancy alert?) that finds himself stuck in an endless repeat of the same day. Bill Murray is perfect in the role of reporter Phil Connors.

    The premise of the movie is that Phil Connors is doomed to live the same day over and over and over. For Connors, Groundhog Day begins each morning at 6:00 A.M as Sonny & Cher’s “I Got You Babe” blares out from his alarm clock radio. The twist is that his (and only his) memories of the “previous” day remain intact, trapped in a seemingly endless “time loop” to repeat the same day endlessly. 

    I thought of another famous Bill Murray quote…this time from Stripes.

    And then depression set in.

    So what is the point of these ramblings? Is it to impress you with my cerebral movie tastes? The point is that too many followers of Jesus are stuck in a Groundhog Day life of their own. They wake up every day and feel trapped in a repeating pattern of frustrating behavior. And then, depression sets in. Why is that? I lived a Groundhog Day kind of faith for years. The Apostle Paul wrote about this very thing (not the giant rodent part…the repeating behavior part) in his letter to the Romans.

    I decide to do good, but I don’t really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don’t result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time. (Romans 7, The Message)

    Wow…can I relate to that. A bit later Paul writes…I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?

    That is the real question. And there is a real answer offered by Paul.

    The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

    So what can you do to get out of this sin spiral?

    Nothing.

    Wait!  Don’t let depression set in. This is good news! You and I can’t do it. I am incapable in my own efficacy to escape my spiritual Groundhog Day. Only Jesus can enable me to escape this endless loop of frustration. Further advice from Paul follows in Chapter 8 of his amazing letter to the Romans.

    But if God himself has taken up residence in your life, you can hardly be thinking more of yourself than of him. 

    Allow the truth of that verse to soak in.

    Want to get out of your Groundhog Day existence? Most readers of these humble ramblings realize they couldn’t deal with their sin separation from God on their own. We needed Jesus. So why do we think we can deal with our ongoing sin issues on our own? When the Father looks at me on my very worst day this is what He sees.

    Jesus.

    That is step one. I don’t have to clean up the sin to please God. He loves me already because of Jesus. Step Two. I am learning daily to recognize that the Spirit of God has taken up residence in my life. I am learning that I am the one who limits His power by restricting access and not trusting Him with my thoughts and actions. I am learning that I don’t need to wake up to the frustrating effects of repeated self-effort. I can wake up trusting God, trusting that Jesus has my sin covered and trusting that the Spirit of God will allow me to resolve that sin. Trusting God and what His Word says to be true allows me to escape the Groundhog Day syndrome.

    The moral of the movie Groundhog Day was that Phil Connor needed to learn that he was self-absorbed and dependent on his selfish efforts to get ahead. The moral of the spiritual groundhog day is to learn that we cannot depend on our self efforts to live a joyful and free Christian life. I come to Jesus by grace and total dependence. I live for Jesus by grace and total dependence. While the other groundhog is busy predicting weather I would suggest you try this for the next six weeks.
    When the alarm jars you awake remember this truth. Instead of the Sonny and Cher song you can sing “I Got You Lord”. The two of you can end this “Groundhog Day” of frustration. I can’t help you with the weather.

  • Jesus and Politics

    Jesus and Politics

    Nothing like starting out the week by discussing two of the three forbidden topics: politics and Jesus. I used to be a rabid political guy. I once believed we could change the culture with the right political leaders. I was right to have the dream but wrong about the method. Even if I could get my “dream team” elected we would still have a problem in our culture.

    Sin.

    Politics and law don’t change the inconvenient truth that we have an inherent human heart problem. Jesus gave us a perfect example of what it looks like to be a good citizen while recognizing what really changes the heart of man. The religious legalists (the Pharisees) were trying to trick Jesus to get Him in trouble with the Roman government. Nice try.

    “Teacher,” they said, “we know how honest you are. You are impartial and don’t play favorites. You teach the way of God truthfully. Now tell us—is it right to pay taxes to Caesar or not? Should we pay them, or shouldn’t we?”

    Jesus saw through their hypocrisy and said, “Why are you trying to trap me? Show me a Roman coin, and I’ll tell you.”When they handed it to him, he asked, “Whose picture and title are stamped on it?”

    “Caesar’s,” they replied.

    “Well, then,” Jesus said, “give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, and give to God what belongs to God.”

    His reply completely amazed them.

    Tim Keller brilliantly identifies what happens when we make politics an ultimate thing.

    If you center your life and identity on a “noble cause,” you will divide the world into “good” and “bad” and demonize your opponents. Ironically, you will be controlled by your enemies. Without them, you have no purpose.

    We have taken demonizing to an art form in this current climate and both sides of the aisle believe they have a noble cause. We have seen the devastation to our country when we demonize our opponents. We must not fall into that trap as representatives of Jesus. Love those who oppose you and show them that grace is a bipartisan gift from God. Let me say that I take my responsibility as a citizen very seriously. I do my homework and I vote in every election. That is a privilege I treasure. Who is in power has been an issue throughout history.

    Paul wrote to a church in Rome that certainly had to deal with some political issues.

    Everyone must submit to governing authorities. For all authority comes from God, and those in positions of authority have been placed there by God.  (Romans 13:1, NLT)

    That can be a hard one for believers right, left, and center to stomach at times. But I didn’t write those words in Scripture that remind me that God is in control and I am not.

    Philip Yancey wrote these words.

    Jesus and Paul spent no energy on trying to clean up the Roman empire, despite their terrible practices of abandoning infants, pederasty, and gladiator games.  Indeed, the people Jesus denounced most harshly, the Pharisees, were some of the most moral people on earth.  He did not give us the challenge of imposing our morality on others, but rather of spreading a far more radical message: that God loves sinners.  Politics is based on power, and power always causes divisions.  It is very difficulty indeed to get across a message of love and power at the same time.  One of them always loses out, and we are called to emphasize love.

    I agree. Jesus spent zero time trying to change the political culture. He spent all of His time changing hearts. The real power to change our broken world comes from the finished work of Jesus and the transformational power of the Gospel.

    My book, Waking Up Slowly, can be used as a 21 Day Journey to become more connected with God, one another and yourself.

    Waking Up Slowly_Cover

  • Can’t “Duck” This Vital Need

    Can’t “Duck” This Vital Need

    I remember sitting with Joni outside a little cabin near Fredericksburg, Texas when a flock of eight ducks noisily left the pond and waddled toward us. They lined up and quacked expectantly. If I spoke duck I suspect the translation would have been something like the famous quote from Caddyshack.

    “Hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.”

    We fed the ducks some cereal flakes and apparently that was an acceptable offering. Every time we went out on our porch the ducks would waddle over and wait for their snack. Joni and I were fascinated by their behaviors. They always stayed together. There was a clear leader of the pack and when the leader decided it was time to move on to other activities the seven dutifully followed. They swam at the same time. Groomed at the same time. They slept at the same time. They were created to thrive in community. So are we.

    Here is an excerpt from my book Stay about living in community.

    We were created to be in a community with other believers. Because of our unity in Christ, we are to embrace those different from ourselves. That’s what makes a church dynamic to a person who experiences grace and acceptance for the first time. And that is why church can be devastating when the congregation becomes selective, judgmental, and legalistic. Anne Lamott shares a thought-provoking observation: “You can safely assume you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.”

    That is both an ouch and an amen statement. When differences result in judgment, what we thought was a safe place instead becomes the biggest betrayal of all. When we become “experienced” Christians, something seems to happen. We can lose touch with our former brokenness and sinfulness and desperate need to be forgiven and accepted. That is when the pretense begins that our holiness is based on performance instead of complete dependence on Christ.

    Years ago I wrote When Bad Christians Happen to Good People. I envisioned a church that would be the kind of place that you couldn’t keep people away from even if you barred the doors. A place that would value every spiritual, physical, and financial gift, no matter how big or small. A place that would make it a practice to reach out and care for one another sacrificially. A place committed to meet those needs that we now prefer to leave to the “professional Christians” on staff. I dreamed of people from different walks of life, economic status, and culture being involved in each other’s lives without our differences dividing us. A place that would practice the prodigal son ministry, running to welcome those returning home, especially those scarred by bad decisions and sin. We would hold our brothers and sisters accountable to godly standards, but always in humility and grace. We would delight in the company of other spiritual travelers and make it a priority that no one ever felt alone.

    I realize now that what I was longing for was a place of grace.

    I know that finding and living in real community in our culture isn’t easy. I understand how easy it is to want to throw in the towel. I almost did. The truth is that we need community, even if we’ve been hurt by bad relationships in the past. If you aren’t in a community of grace, it may be time to ask God to lead you to such a place. I know that can be daunting. It took me a long time to find such a place, but I found one. It took me a longer time to realize how God was redeeming every hurt, every slight, and every trial. Eventually, I was able to see how He’d been preparing me, especially through those hard times, to embrace and welcome grace in a whole new way.

    I have been swept away by grace. My life—including my relationship with Jesus, my marriage, and my ministry—have been transformed. It’s been that dramatic.

    Taken from Stay by Dave Burchett copyright © 2015. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.