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Sometimes we wonder if God is still there. Sometimes we wonder if He really cares about what is happening in our lives. Sometimes we wonder if it will ever get any better.

Those are questions that every honest follow of Jesus has wrestled with. My friend Bart Millard of MercyMe was pondering those questions when he wrote one of the most powerful songs from their amazing new record Lifer. I found it interesting that in the same time frame I was writing a chapter about doubt in my book Waking Up Slowly.

Bart can write in a stanza what it takes me hundreds of rambling words to say. But both of us experience the same struggle. We share the hope of grace. We write and sing about how our identity is not worldly success but who we are in Christ and who God says we are because of that relationship. You should be extremely grateful that Bart Millard is the one who sings. We both try to communicate that on your worst day you are loved and cherished by the Father.

But when you write about grace and identity you know that life and/or the Enemy will give you a pop quiz. The lyrics from Even If are powerful

It’s easy to sing
When there’s nothing to bring me down
But what will I say
When I’m held to the flame
Like I am right now

I know you’re able
And I know you can
Save through the fire
With your mighty hand
But even if you don’t
My hope’s still you alone.

As I finished the final edit for Waking Up Slowly I had my test. And I had to decide if the words I was about to share with you in a hardcover book with a pretty cover were true in my own life. I remember talking to my sweet wife about a disappointing situation.

“Nothing that happens in my life is a surprise to God. So I will either receive blessings I never expected from this, I will grow in my faith, or a combination of those two.”

“Is that how you feel?” Joni quizzed.

“NOPE!” I responded honestly. “But that is what I am trusting and if I keep believing those truths my feelings will follow.”

I can tell you that they have. God has been present. I have seen His hand in so many ways. I wrote these words in a chapter called The Doubt Bout about my own struggles.

I am drawn to Jesus. I believe that God decided to redeem man through this outlandish plan. No religion offers redemption without works other than the gospel of Jesus. I believe I have seen His hand over and over in my life. But if I am wrong and had the opportunity to live my life over again, I can honestly say I would change nothing.

I consider a life pursuing the impossible goal of becoming like Jesus to be more valuable than any honor or possession I could attain. The teachings of Jesus are so amazing and so radical that I cannot imagine that any man could have imagined them. If you drill down into just His words you will find a sacred pathway that is worth seeking.

Because I have followed the teachings of Jesus, I believe my marriage is still intact. I don’t say that lightly. I honestly believe that without that faith commitment, Joni and I would not have survived. Whatever kind things that my friends and colleagues might say about me are in large part due to how I believe I should respond to them based on the words of Christ. I have been shaped and matured by this radical Rabbi who changed history. He changed me.

The Christian Gospel is that I am so flawed that Jesus had to die for me, yet I am so loved and valued that Jesus was glad to die for me. This leads to deep humility and deep confidence at the same time. It undermines both swaggering and sniveling. I cannot feel superior to anyone, and yet I have nothing to prove to anyone. I do not think more of myself nor less of myself. Instead, I think of myself less. ~ Tim Keller, The Reason For God

I have been changed by these truths. I have confronted my doubts and I have chosen to stay focused on the claims of this Rabbi from Nazareth. If I am wagering my eternity, I choose to wager on Jesus.

Taken from Waking Up Slowly by Dave Burchett copyright © 2017. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.

Jesus is not an easy choice at times. The Apostle John wrote that many followers were deserting Jesus after some difficult teaching.

At this point many of his disciples turned away and deserted him. Then Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked, “Are you also going to leave?”
Simon Peter replied, “Lord, to whom would we go? You have the words that give eternal life. We believe, and we know you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:66-68, NLT)

Indeed. I plant my flag of faith on that hill of eternal truth. Jesus is my hope. Even if…

I know you’re able
And I know you can
Save through the fire
With your mighty hand
But even if you don’t
My Hope’s still you alone
I know the sorrow
I know the hurt
Would all go away
If you’d just say the word
But even if you don’t
My hope’s still you alone

I am trusting that today.

If you read more than a snippet of my writings you know that I am a grace guy. But there is a question that confounds me.

“If grace based theology as the way to live out the Christian life is true then why is it not more popular in the church?”

That is a great question. I have been swept away by grace. Everything in my life has been changed by taking away my performance based faith and believing in Christ’s performance for me.

During a recent preseason football telecast I thought about a parallel between one of my least favorite football strategies and this grace conundrum. Perhaps it was an insight from the Holy Spirit. Perhaps it was simply because my brain is not wired to factory specs. But this idea popped in my mind. A lot of football teams play a defense that is called the prevent defense. That style of defense is designed to allow the opponent short yardage gains as the defense tries to prevent big plays and long touchdowns. The theory is that if you can force the other team to settle for short gains they will eventually make a mistake, get called for a penalty, or simply fail to get the yardage needed.

I thought about the opponent we line up against as followers of Christ. It occurred to me that Satan played a kind of “prevent” defense in my spiritual journey for many years. It was almost like the Enemy was willing to give up short gains of spiritual growth and ministry as long as I focused on my own efforts to keep grinding out more gains. Satan, like a good defensive coordinator, believed that I would make a mistake and then he could pounce on my miscue and cause a costly turnover. My failure would cause me to doubt myself, my commitment and my worth. When I made a mistake Satan’s play by play announcer would broadcast loudly in my head.

“You have failed again. Jesus must be really disappointed with this effort but He certainly is not surprised. Dave has been a disappointing member of the team since he joined.”

After another failure I would get tentative and fearful. The announcer always chimed in.

“Certainly no reason to expect victory from Dave this time. He has failed over and over in this very situation. To be honest, I am not sure why Jesus even keeps him on the roster. Expect him to be cut soon.”

The goal line of joy and freedom and peace seemed more and more difficult to reach. Finally I was happy just to make a short gain now and then. I seldom sustained a lengthy drive of positive spiritual gains.

But then I discovered a new offense. A game plan that Satan can’t defend. When I lined up with grace there was no way for the Enemy to keep me from the goal of freedom and joy. Instead of grinding out each painful yard with begrudging self-effort I simply followed the lead block of the Spirit and ran with confidence. I remembered my team identity and the power that was promised from that association. I believed that I would be victorious not because of my skill but because of Christ.

Maybe the analogy is a stretch. Maybe not. Since I detest the prevent defense in football it seems logical it came from Satan. I do think there is something to consider in the idea that Satan “gives” us little gains and tries really hard to stop the big ones. I believe that grace scares the Enemy more that anything we do because grace relies on surrender and trust. My self-effort against the ruler of this world is a long shot. My surrendered life to Jesus is a sure victory. Jesus has fought this battle and won. Why we would we not depend on His game plan to reach the goal? I will meditate on these words from Hebrews this week.

So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.  (Hebrews 4, NLT)

Check out my newest book Waking Up Slowly here.

You see t-shirts and signs that proclaim that I am the master of my destiny. Slogans like these sounded really empowering.

“If it is to be, it is up to me”

“If you can dream it you can achieve it”

I agree that having a good attitude and determination is important. But sometimes my life experience is more accurately described by the great boxer and philosopher Mike Tyson.

“Everyone has a plan ’til they get punched in the mouth”

Yep. Well said Mike. No matter how much I may plan my life I will face the inevitable “punches” in the mouth that life delivers. No amount of efforts to control my life will prevent illness. I do not have control over every relationship in my life. I cannot keep those I care about from making bad decisions. I cannot control unforeseeable circumstances that impact those I love. Recently I have had a couple of Mike Tyson moments.

James warns about the folly of thinking that we are in control.

Look here, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business there and make a profit.” How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, “If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.” Otherwise you are boasting about your own pretentious plans, and all such boasting is evil. (James 4:13-16, NLT)

The one thing we can be sure of is that we have trials and heartaches in this journey. The question I must answer is how will I deal with the inevitable? I wrote about the answer to that question in my book Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace.

One person responds to tragedy with deeper faith. Another turns from God in anger, perhaps never to return. What is the difference? Perhaps this parable that Jesus related in Matthew’s Gospel offers the biggest clue. When the storm hits, what matters most is the foundation that you have built your faith upon.

Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.  (Matthew 7:24-27)

I have dealt with loss by relying on both types of foundations. My early theology was built on the shifting sand of self-effort and discipline. When the storm came, my “house of faith” collapsed like a house of cards. When I began to build on a foundation of identity and trusting who God is, my house of faith weathered the storm without being completely destroyed. The storm battered me full force, but the house stood.

What is that foundation made of? I would suggest that these are the foundation stones.

God is all powerful.

God is all knowing.

God is love.

God is holy.

God is good.

God is just.

God is righteous.

God is grace.

God is sovereign.

God is unchanging.

God is joy.

God is forgiving.

God is truth.

God is patient.

If the gospel message is true—and I believe it is—then God says to trust Him when we face trials. His ways are not our ways, and His timing is certainly not ours, but His love is real.

Today I choose to stand on that foundation. I am not in control but I am confident in the One who is. To quote the old hymn that my dad loved so much.

Many things about tomorrow
I don’t seem to understand
But I know Who holds tomorrow
And I know Who holds my hand

Order your copy of Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace.

I wrote this for my niece a few years ago. Perhaps there is a student you can share it with.

1.    I wish I had known that my high school years did not define me for life

My teen years were a mixed bag of memorable highs and incredible lows. Now I realize that I am grateful for what I once considered some of the worst moments of my life. In many of those spiritual valleys you could not have begun to convince me that God was molding me or that those experiences could ever be of value.

I have developed a heart of compassion for those who are wounded. Why? God gave me the privilege of being wounded early in my life. That sounds crazy as I read back over that last sentence. But I can now see that my struggles as an overweight, geeky and often outcast adolescent molded my heart to empathize with those who are hurt and ostracized by their peers.

Had I been the coolest guy or the best athlete I most likely would not have developed a sensitive spirit to others. With the benefit of hindsight I can promise you that I am grateful for every refining difficulty and problem. High school did not define who I would become and it does not define you either.

2.     I wish I had known that every person is created in God’s image…and He loves them just as much as He loves me

Sparky Anderson, a former Cincinnati Reds manager, once said that “you can never go wrong being classy.” And you can never go wrong being kind to everyone. Sometimes you will be tempted to ridicule or tease those who are less attractive, intelligent, gifted, or cool. Don’t do it. When you go to a high school reunion many years later you learn an eye-opening truth. Some of those high school “losers” are the “winners” now. They have wonderful families and lives. Some of the kids I was desperate to be like are still living off of moldy high school memories. High school is the start of a very long journey. Some people seem to be leading the life race coming out of high school turn but there is a long way to go. The real winners know that life is a marathon and that God has a plan for that long race. Be kind to everyone. Jesus loves them. And so should you.

3.    I wish I had known in high school that I needed to take responsibility for my own actions

Learn now to say these three sentences.

I was wrong.
I am sorry.
Forgive me.

And keep your “but” out of those statements. Don’t say “I was wrong ‘but’ I didn’t think it would hurt you” or “I am sorry ‘but’ I was having a bad day.”  Those are not real apologies. Take responsibility. Live with integrity. That will make you unique in this culture!

4. I wish I had known that God had a plan for my life

Every person has a God-designed destiny whether they believe it or not. Henri Nouwen wrote about living with that frame of mind.
We seldom realize fully that we are sent to fulfill God-given tasks. . . . We act as if we were simply dropped down in creation and have to decide how to entertain ourselves until we die. But we were sent into the world by God, just as Jesus was. Once we start living our lives with that conviction, we will soon know what we were sent to do.

Living out of who you are is liberating. The apostle Paul had some thoughts about such a life when he wrote to the church at Ephesus.
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. (Ephesians 2:8-10, NLT)
Think about that! You were rescued from the death of sin by grace. It was a gift that could not be earned. And you are a new creation, indeed a masterpiece for whom good things were planned from the beginning of time. How can followers of Jesus possibly have self-image issues? When we believe the lies.

5.  I wish I had known that the most important decision I will ever make is who or what I worship

Everyone one worships something or someone. It can be money or power or fame or popularity or another person. We have a deep yearning to find our purpose and significance. If you don’t find that identity and significance in Christ you will tend to fill it with wrong things. Often those things are not inherently bad. But they can become bad things when they become the focus instead of Jesus. We used to sing a camp song with these lyrics..

Seek ye first the kingdom of God
And His righteousness
And all these things shall be added unto you

There is nothing wrong with these “things” when you seek the kingdom of God first.

6)  I wish I had known that God’s grace is the key to freedom

In high school I learned quite clearly that my performance was the key to my acceptance. I transferred that belief to my relationship with God. That was a spiritual stumbling block until I learned the remarkable truth of God’s grace. I finally learned that it was Jesus’ performance for me that makes me accepted by God and not my good behavior for Him.

Grace allows me to quit trying to be righteous and actually begin to be righteous as I focus on the One who gave me the gift of grace. Grace allows me to deal with sin instead of trying to manage and rationalize it. Grace is real and powerful. It is not weak or cheap. If you think grace is cheap, go to the foot of the cross, look up, and see what grace price was paid for every person on earth. Grace should never be my cover for sin. Instead grace is my only hope to deal with it. Grace makes me tremble when I think of an almighty and powerful God who loved someone unlovable like me. Why would He give such a gift to an unworthy child? And how could I be comfortable taking advantage of that amazing grace? I cannot. I pray that I will not. Grace is compelling. I want it to be compelling in my life as well. Real grace works. Love grace with abandon.
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God.
(Ephesians 2:8, NLT)

Taken from Stay by Dave Burchett copyright © 2015. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved.

I pray you will consider these humble observations wherever you are in your journey.

Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace makes a great gift for your graduate. You can read the first chapter free by clicking here.

This is an article I wrote twelve years ago when Joni was going through chemotherapy for Her2 Positive breast cancer. She is a proud survivor and I am re-posting this for my wonderful niece Deb and others who are going through this trial.

Last night I had the weird privilege of helping clip off the rest of my bride’s hair that was falling out from the chemotherapy. As I reflected on that moment later I realized that nearly everything I knew about beauty when I was 25 years old was wrong. Like most men I looked for appearance first and then tried to find some good qualities. Joni was a stunningly beautiful woman when I fell in love with her over thirty years ago.  I have often said that I married my trophy wife first and got it over with. I also joke that I married her to deepen my gene pool. And she has done that admirably. One of the ironies of this cancer journey is remembering how much I loved Joni’s long hair in the early years of our relationship. In fact I was unhappy when she cut it a few years into our marriage without discussing it first. Her hair was a real part of her beauty in my stunted male view of what beauty in a woman means.

To be completely honest I wondered how I would react when the chemo therapy had its inevitable effect and she would be bald. Oh, I knew I would say the right things. I am not that stupid. But how would I react inside? Would it matter more than I cared to admit? And that is when I realized how much God has been working over the years. He has been retooling my thinking and my heart. Patiently. Quietly. Lovingly.

Joni’s hair began to give up while I was on a recent trip. She decided to get the buzz cut while I was gone. So I walked in the door and she, in typical Joni fashion asked, “Want to see my head?” When I did I realized what God has been doing over the years to a shallow and selfish guy. He has been changing me and what I perceive to be beautiful. Because the truth is that Joni is as beautiful to me today as she was with that long, shining hair thirty years ago. That is because I am learning what beauty in a woman really looks like.

Some days are better than others. I am grateful for the days when the sparkle returns to her beautiful blue eyes. Those eyes are the windows to a soul that has more depth than I could ever achieve. She is remarkable. She is my hero. Her faith inspires me. Her smile still lights up the room. I treasure each moment that I can make her laugh. The sound of her laughing is like a symphony to me. I have learned that beauty is so much more than what the world and testosterone ridden young men (or older men) think it is. Beauty is a package. One part physical to be sure. But beauty in the covenant of marriage is also emotional and spiritual.  When I fell in love with Joni I just thought I was marrying a foxy lady. I was really too stupid to know I was marrying a gift from God. The classic description of a Godly woman from Proverbs 31 fits her pretty well.

Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is worth more than precious rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life…

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs with no fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and kindness is the rule when she gives instructions. She carefully watches all that goes on in her household and does not have to bear the consequences of laziness. Her children stand and bless her. Her husband praises her: There are many virtuous and capable women in the world, but you surpass them all! Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised. Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.

I married an amazing women. Right now she happens to be bald…and so very beautiful.

I received a lot of feedback from a post suggesting that we make faith entirely too complicated. Jesus didn’t say figure out every theological jot and tittle. (Note to spiritual hall monitors: there is an important place for that discipline. No all caps comments please)

Jesus didn’t say, “Go and clean up your act, and I will deem you a worthy follower.”

He didn’t say, “Browbeat yourself and others into behaving better in order to earn the badge of righteousness.”

Jesus didn’t say,  “Try harder, be more disciplined, and I will be pleased with you.”

He simply said,
“Follow me.”

Not once. Pretty regularly.

“Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will make you fishers of men.” (Matthew 4:19)

Jesus told him, “Follow me.” (Matthew 8:22)

[Jesus said,] “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.”
(Matthew 16:24)

[Jesus answered,] “Come, follow me.”  (Matthew 19:21)

Finding Philip, he said to him, “Follow me.” (John 1:43)

[Jesus replied,] “Whoever serves me must follow me.” (John 12:26)

“Follow me,” he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him. (Matthew 9:9)

In the immortal words of Forrest Gump, “I’m not a smart man.” But I have a keen sense of the obvious. Jesus is saying to follow Him. That takes childlike trust on my part. The rest of it we will figure out together as I follow Him in complete trust. I am, even if you are kind in your evaluations, a slow learner. I cannot believe how long it took me to even begin to understand God’s grace and how much freedom that gives me. But to begin to live out of that truth, I had to trust it.

It starts by having no fear when Jesus asks me to follow Him. When He says, “Follow Me,” the response should be simple.

“Let’s go.”

Excerpted from Stay: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace

Recently our family was rocked to hear that my wonderful, kind, beautiful niece Debbie would be fighting a difficult battle in the months to come. When she heard the words bladder cancer she had the predictable responses of shock, fear, and sadness. Here is what I love about this woman. She took in the news, processed it, determined that she would fight with every ounce of strength she possessed and made it known that she was trusting God. Deb adopted a verse from Isaiah for the difficult road ahead.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. (Isaiah 41:10, NIV)

This past week Debbie enjoyed a family beach getaway as she prepared for battle. Debbie knelt down and wrote this in the sand.

I loved the imagery of writing these words of trust on the sand canvas of God’s creation. But it also reminded me that soon the waves and tide would wash away those words. Each day will require a commitment from Deb to the truth that God is always present in her trial. Each day we, as the community who love her, will join in prayer and encouragement for Debbie and others we love that are fighting battles.

When Joni went through her cancer journey we adopted a song from Casting Crowns.

The lyrics are a powerful reminder of who God is and that He is always there. I can’t explain why things happen. I have learned in my years of following Jesus that He does not let suffering go in vain. He brings beauty out of ashes. When I cannot see how any good can come out of a trial I trust my Abba Father in faith. Believe me I don’t always “feel” that but I can move forward in faith because I have seen over and over how God redeems trials and that He is our hope in the storm.

I lift my eyes unto the hills
Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord
The maker of heaven and earth

Peter talked about the inevitability of suffering. I love that he wrapped up that reality check with an incredible promise of hope.

In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, He will restore, support, and strengthen you, and He will place you on a firm foundation. (1 Peter 5, NLT)

That is a promise that we can hold onto during the storm. Jesus meets us there and not in theory. He suffered. He agonized with God the Father. He knows the human condition. He has already been there. When you have nowhere else to turn but to Jesus you find out that you should have turned to Him first all along.

I am trusting that promise from 1 Peter for my dear niece Debbie today. I would be honored if you felt led to join Team Deb in this battle by praying for her and her family. This remarkable women has a big heart and she is trusting a bigger God. I am looking forward to a not too distant day when Debbie can share with joy how her faith won over fear.