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Some days are too busy to write. So if I may paraphrase the classis bit from Johnny Carson…

“I have in my hand some earlier posts, a child of four can plainly see these posts are hermetically sealed. They’ve been kept since noon today in a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnalls’ porch. No one-but one -knows the contents.” 

With no further ado we open the seal to one of these earlier posts. Hope you enjoy.

Dave

I used to be terrified by Dracula when I was a kid. Bela Lugosi played the Transylvania terror and I did not sleep well for many nights after seeing that movie. The standard defense methods against a vampire were generally not available to an eight year old kid. I did not have any silver bullets, did not possess a crucifix, was too chicken to think about the wooden stake, and could not figure out an excuse to put garlic on the shopping list. So I hunkered down under the covers, stayed close to beloved mutt Penny, and began my first foray into earnest prayer. God does work in mysterious ways.

So it brought back those childhood memories when I picked up an article headlined Give the slip to ‘energy vampires’. The premise of the piece written by Patrick Pemberton is that certain people possess bad vibes, passive-aggressive tactics or outright meanness that simply wipes you out. The concept comes from a book written by psychiatrist Judith Orloff entitled “Positive Energy: 10 Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress & Fear into Vibrance, Strength and Love”. I certain relate to the 9 classifications of energy vampires that she outlines. Her ideas to combat them veered a bit from my strategy. Let’s look at a few of them with Orloff’s strategy with the approach of your humble bad Christian following in italics.

THE BLAMER

This guy has a sneaky way of making you feel guilty for not getting things right. He’ll dole out endless guilt, resort to verbal abuse, and levy accusations, leaving no room for discussion.

Solution: Imagine yourself enveloped in a cocoon of white light, then picture the cocoon as a shield forming a fail-safe barrier around you. This is a barrier zone where negative vibes can’t disable you.

Reaction…. Uhhhhh. Okay. My cocoon proved to be way too porous (shouldn’t have used the lowest bidder) and negative vibes pummelled me. So I went back to my original plan. I don’t mean to get all spiritual but this is actually where I am in my journey with Jesus. I have finally realized that I have a new identity in Christ. When confronted with verbal accusations, guilt, and even verbal abuse I am learning (still got a long way to go) to remember that I am attempting to live in a way that demonstrates the supernatural presence of God investing in my life. To respond gently in such a circumstance is supernatural. I am not talking about being a wimp. A strong but gentle response communicated with grace is my goal. Jesus laid down the uncomfortable truth in the gospel of Matthew.

“If all you do is love the lovable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that. If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that. In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.”  Matthew 5 The Message

THE SO-CALLED FRIEND

Driven by envy or insecurity, she puts you down for seemingly no reason, deflating your energy.

Solution: Break eye contact and visualize yourself power-sucking back every drop of energy she’s taken from you. Exhale and envision negative energy as dark gunk leaving your body through your lower spine as you picture fresh air and sunlight coming in. Consider a bath or shower and drink lots of water to reinforce this feeling of cleansing.

Wow. That is some toxic friend! Do you have to call the EPA for this strategy? This is an area that is under construction in my life. My Christian journey is much like Interstate 35 from Dallas to Austin. Constant construction, delays, and frustration. But when the construction is finished and the traffic runs smoothly it is such a relief. That is how my experience with Christ has been. I finish construction on one area and enjoy the exhilaration of smooth sailing. Then I realize that the Lord is setting up construction cones again. Doh!

I am learning to confront the so-called friend in love. Again, I turn to the teachings of Jesus. “This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God.Or say you’re out on the street and an old enemy accosts you. Don’t lose a minute. Make the first move; make things right with him.” 

Easy? Hardly.

But amazingly effective most of the time.

CHAOTIC CROWDS

It can be an unruly crowd, complete with elbowing, smoking strangers, or just a big rowdy group at a mall or sporting event that gives you a general sense of chaos.

Solution: Find a quiet seating area out of the stream of people where you can go to take a breath, close your eyes, then imagine yourself in a tranquil setting.

The stunning Mrs. Burchett and I just found ourselves in such a situation recently at a post-Christmas sale that resembled a European soccer riot. We found the following solution also works very well.

Leave.

THE FIXER-UPPER

A dependent, she makes you her therapist and calls on you to fix her problems.

Solution: Identify the co-dependency issues and distance yourself with compassion. Offer emotional support, but don’t spew out solutions. If you’re consistent, she won’t expect you to fix her problems in the future.

This is a tough one. But people generally become dependent for a reason. Often the reason goes deeper than a friend can dig out. But offering love and the hope that I possess is one fixer-upper that has worked for me and those I love.

Other categories of energy vampires include the Unintentional Sapper, the Seemingly Nice Guy, the Constant Talker, and the Drama Queen. Most of us can relate to the people described by Ms Orloff. But I must tell you that I find an inherent danger in allowing myself to view people like this. Believe me I am often tempted to go to my cocoon of white light and avoid the neediness of those around me. But the words of Jesus continue to trip up my desires.

“Let me tell you why you are here. You’re here to be salt-seasoning that brings out the God-flavors of this earth. If you lose your saltiness, how will people taste godliness? You’ve lost your usefulness and will end up in the garbage. Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand–shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven.”    Matthew 5 The Message

I cannot perceive those who annoy me as my adversaries and still live as a follower of Jesus. So while I enjoy the amusing concept of energy vampires I cannot view them that way. Even those who are a drain are people created in the image of God. Jesus died for the salvation of fixer-uppers, blamers, so-called friends, complainers, drama queens, sob sisters, constants talkers, etc. A more concise categorization of all of these types might be sinners. So I hope I can look at these sometimes needy souls not as vampires but as people who need the hope I hold within me. But on a bad day garlic is still very effective.

There was a little saying that I have heard all of my life.

If you can’t say something nice about them…then don’t say anything.

Had I practiced that very wise advice I would have had many more “quiet times” in my life. I have not always practiced that simple principle even though I have read and nodded solemnly in agreement as I read James and Paul warn of the dangers of gossip and an uncontrolled tongue.  Whether you call it venting or sharing it is always perilously close to gossiping. That is one of those “fine line” challenges. Like Dave Barry’s quote that “there’s a fine line between ‘hobby’ and ‘mental illness’.” I would submit that there is a fine line between venting/sharing and gossip. Gossip is one of the favorite tools that Satan has in his toolbox.

Brooklyn Tabernacle takes gossip very seriously. New members hear this charge as they become members of the church. 

And now, I charge you, as pastor of this church, that if you ever hear another member speak an unkind word of criticism or slander against anyone—myself, another pastor, an usher, a choir member, or anyone else—you have authority to stop that person in mid sentence and say, ?Excuse me—who hurt you? Who ignored you? Who slighted you? Was it Pastor Cymbala? Let’s go to his office right now. He will get on his knees and apologize to you, and then we will pray together, so God can restore peace and unity to this body. But we will not let you talk critically about people who are not present to defend themselves. New members, please understand that I am entirely serious about this. I want to help resolve this kind of thing immediately. And meanwhile, know this: If YOU are ever the one doing the loose talking, we will confront you.

If every church practiced this I suspect we have far less division in the church. An interesting thought about gossip comes from Frank A. Clark. “Gossip needn’t be false to be evil – there’s a lot of truth that shouldn’t be passed around.”

Ouch. That convicted me. I have vented and shared things that were true. Somehow that made me feel better that I was venting truth. But I later realized that my venting was not edifying to the body of Christ. I may have been right but I was not righteous. One of the biggest lessons I am learning about the spiritual dangers of gossip is the Piranha Principle.

The Piranha is an interesting fish. I wrote about visiting the National Aquarium in New Orleans several years ago in my book When Bad Christians Happen to Good People. The potentially deadly fish swam peacefully and quietly in the tank. I read the plaque about the behavior of the fish. Piranha are peaceful when they are fed, water levels are normal, and food sources are readily available. But when the water gets low they feel crowded and threatened. When you add hunger to that situation the entire personality of the Piranha change. They get angry, aggressive, and prone to feeding frenzies. They begin to attack anything in the water, including one another.  

I have seen too many church goers become emotionally frenzied like these Piranha. When we (Christians) are well fed and happy we swim happily about the sanctuary. But if the environment changes watch out. When the Pew Piranha feels threatened or change is instituted the frenzy can begin. Just like our fish counterparts, a feeding frenzy is never a solo act. Others get caught up and join in. And before long the blood of division is in the water. And it is a tragedy for the church, the body of Christ, and for those who get involved.

I have witnessed emotional feeding frenzies in many churches. It is truly amazing the emotional power that is generated by a group of passionate people (often very good people) sharing their frustration and anger apart from prayer, repentance, and forgiveness.

King Solomon wrote that “a perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.” How tragic. But that is happening every single day in the church. Later he notes that “without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down.”

So my challenge to you and to me (as I look uncomfortably into the mirror) is to not add any fuel to the gossip fire. I have too often added kerosene instead of kindness. I want to be tender and not tinder. I cannot use the lyric from the old Billy Joel song as an excuse that “we didn’t start the fire”. Jesus is asking us to not spread the fire and, when we can, to extinguish it with grace.

 

I have tried to avoid the whole Anna Nicole Smith tragedy that is dominating so much of TV “news”. But an ancillary story caught my eye. The article in the Dallas Morning News was titled “Smith joins ranks of Playmates dead before 50“.  Apparently a disproportionate number of women who have posed in Playboy magazine have died tragically before the age of 50. Automobile accidents, drug overdoses, homicides, a plane crash — all have claimed the lives of Playmates. What caught my eye was a comment from a photographer for the magazine.

“It’s sad how many girls we’ve lost,” said Peter Gowland, who photographed a number of centerfolds for Playboy in the 1950s and 60s.

“It’s a curse to be beautiful,” Gowland said.

No, Mr.Gowland, it is a gift to be beautiful. The curse is young women being exploited for their beauty by self-centered men. The curse is believing that your significance and value is found in being a object of lust for selfish men. The curse is sin.

I know I sound like such an old fogey but pornography has become a significant and real problem in our culture. It is a problem for far too many Christian men. When I was a young man you had to go to some seedy, disgusting place to get pornography. Today I am ten seconds away from the whatever I want to download. In the interest of full disclosure I was a regular consumer of the magazine in question many years ago. I regret every cent I spent and every moment I invested in devaluing those women. As men who are serious about following Jesus we must hold one another accountable to not contribute to this demeaning industry. I bought the rationalization for awhile that this magazine was “classier” and had “good articles”. What a load of bovine excrement that argument was in retrospect. I know that many women see no issue in being a “model” for these magazines. That doesn’t change my responsibility to view them as souls created in the image of God for His Glory and not objects for my desires.

Jesus knew how men are wired.  He knew that we cannot play with the fire of lust without eventually getting burned. Countless marriages have been ruined by this pernicious industry. Intimacy has been impacted because of unrealistic expectations. Countless women have been exploited and damaged. And that brings us back to the real curse. Sin.

Let’s call it by it’s name.

There is a cure. Paul prescribes the cure to this curse in his letter to the church at Rome.

When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners.  Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. 8 But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.  And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation.  For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son.  So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.

No, it is not a curse to be beautiful. Or smart. Or talented. It is a curse to define yourself only by a temporal asset. You were created to be in fellowship with your Creator. Find that relationship and then beauty, intelligence, and talents become gifts to be used for God’s glory. Let’s review Paul’s incredible claim from above.

So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.

Sin is the curse. You can check out the cure here.

 

 

Last weekend the striking Mrs.Burchett accompanied me to Nashville to visit eldest son and his lovely bride. We spent Saturday night with a few hundred of our closest friends enjoying a Valentine Concert with Ricky Skaggs and the Nashville Symphony. The venue was the spectacular new Schermerhorn Symphony Center in Nashville. This facility is one more reason to love Nashville and if you have a chance, check it out. What a beautiful hall and the acoustics are amazing!

Ricky Skaggs was also amazing along with his band Kentucky Thunder. Ricky sells t-shirts that proclaim that “Bluegrass Rules” and he is spot on. If you have a pulse you will be tappin’ your foot during his music. But the song that stuck with me days later was not a toe-tappin’ bluegrass tune. It was a moving ballad that Skaggs sang as an encore. Perhaps the song resonated with me because of the recent journey that Joni and I have been traveling. The song is called Somebody’s Prayin’ and here is a snippet of the lyrics.

Well, I’ve walked through barren wilderness
When my pillow was a stone
And I’ve been through the darkest caverns
Where no light had ever shown.
Still I went on ’cause there was someone
Who was down on their knees
And Lord. I thank you for those people
Prayin’ all this time for me.

Joni and I want to humbly and gratefully thank you for praying for us.

Somebody’s prayin’, I can feel it
Somebody’s prayin’ for me
Mighty hands are guiding me
To protect me from what I can’t see
Lord I believe, Lord I believe
Somebody’s prayin’ for me…

Regular readers of these humble ramblings know that I am a bit cynical. So I have to confess that it surprises me a bit that I can feel the prayers of so many people praying for us.

Her almost one year long battle with breast cancer has been tough. We look back on the year and marvel at how well we have weathered this storm. I would be less than honest if I said we have not had down times. But God’s grace and the comfort of His Holy Spirit has been sufficient for the trial. Here is an excerpt from a blog I wrote  about a study done on the effects of prayer just before Joni began chemotherapy.

God is in control. He has a plan. We don’t know what that plan is. But whatever it is we believed that He will give us strength and grace for the journey ahead.

Then we told God our desires.

We desired that Joni would be completely healed. We desired that God would use our journey to help others. We desired that we not “Waste our Cancer” but that He would be glorified through us in the process.

And then we accepted our bottom line.

We are not in control. We have confidence in the One who is. And we prayed like Jesus did in the garden. Okay…it was a loose imitation but we prayed the same kind of prayer. We wish this cup could be removed but not our will but Yours God be done.

So here is my conclusion. You can not quantify such a complicated theological and spiritual process. If I tell some scientists that I felt the prayers of Christians they would think I was looney tunes. If I tell a researcher that I am praying not just for healing but for God’s will that doesn’t fit into a neat little study category. How can a scientific study divvy up people into groups? We don’t know the mind of God and His plan for any of the people in the study. It was a lovely idea but I don’t need a bunch of labcoats to verify what I felt on Monday. Sorry. Maybe I am looney tunes. But I have something that you can’t measure, dissect, or research.

The peace that passes all understanding.

Many friends and family have prayed for Joni and for me. I guess you kind of expect that. Or at least hope that will be the case. What has touched and blessed us is that people all over the world are praying that don’t even know us personally. Some are praying because of this blog. Some because of prayer requests posted at churches and ministries around the country. It has been an incredible demonstration of the body of Christ at it’s best. We see the not so flattering aspects of the church at times and I don’t shy away from that reality. But the fellowship and unity in Christ that we have experienced through Joni’s cancer has been inspiring and healing.

Thank you. We have a big day coming up in March when we reach the one year mark in the journey. Joni will have the full array of scans and tests to see if the cancer is gone. We would be grateful if you remembered that as well. We praise God for each one of you who has brought us before the throne of grace. It has helped. And we can feel it. And if we may paraphrase the Apostle Paul and his words to the believers at Ephesus.

We have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in our prayers. We keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.  Eph 1 NIV

I picked up USA Today today (that drives the grammar check crazy) and found a story about The Secret. What is The Secret? It is a controversial self-help book and DVD that claims to know the secret to happiness. Author Rhonda Byrne says the secret is the law of attraction. If you think positively you become a magnet that pulls everything you want toward you. Whether you want a new job, a million dollars, or a gorgeous girlfriend. I apparently need to reverse the polarity of my magnet because I tend to only pull dog hairs and dysfunctional people toward me. So I was intrigued. Especially when I discovered that The Secret carries this centuries’ version of the Good Housekeeping Seal…an endorsement from Oprah. Like she needs another million or a new job.

Byrne is an Australian reality-TV producer who discovered “the secret” to obtaining everything you want through studying religious and philosophical texts.

“Everyone has to have their own experience to believe,” says Byrne, 55. “People start with little things like deciding a cup of coffee will come to you or that you’ll see a feather. There’s no difference between attracting a feather and anything else you want. It’s as easy to attract one dollar as it is $10,000.”

I have to admit that as I was writing this post on a flight from Memphis a cup of coffee came to me. The flight attendant on this American Airlines flight pulled a little cart right up to my seat and asked if I wanted something to drink. Amazing. I have to confess that the exact same thing happened yesterday before I knew about the secret. Perhaps I am just gifted at this.

I decided to skip the whole weird feather thing and go right to bigger things. I am going to think positively that you will click on this link right now and buy 5 copies of my books.

I’m waiting.

While I was waiting I found some more dog hairs on my pants. Obviously the polarity has not switched. There are, of course, skeptics of The Secret. Professor Robert Thompson of Syracuse University calls it “at best, silliness” and “good old-American snake oil salesmanship.” Advocates of The Secret tout the law of attraction for everything from finding good parking spots to curing disease. That is a concern. No one dies from getting a bad parking spot. Not surprisingly, the always bizarre celebrity set has jumped on board the phenomenon.

The whole thing just makes me sad. People are so desperate to find something, anything, to give them hope and a little happiness. Like the old country song, I believe they are lookin’ for love in all the wrong places. So I decided to share my secret with you. I have gleaned this from my study of ancient texts and from personal experience. I cannot promise you good parking spots. I cannot promise you a million dollars. I can’t promise you a gorgeous girlfriend or boyfriend. My blog is not endorsed by Oprah.  If you are still interested let me tell you what my secret will give you.

Joy
Purpose
Significance
Strength in times of trouble
Power to forgive

My secret is not a law or rule. My secret is actually The Gift. The Gift is grace. The Gift is given by God. Jesus said that He came that you may have life and have it more abundantly. That verse has been so misapplied by those who claim “Beemers and Baubles” as a sign of God’s blessings. That is not what Jesus said in this text. The abundant life is simple. By living a grace filled life I can forgive the hurt and forget the grip of my past. I can live confidently without fear of the future. And I can live content in the moment. That is a prescription for happiness. When I autopsy what makes me unhappy it fits into one or more of those categories. Regrets from the past, fear of the future, or discontent with the present. The Gift can free from you those joy robbers even  if you have to go get your own coffee.

That’s my secret. You don’t have to buy my book (but feel free if you want to) to share my secret of The Gift. For further research read the Gospel of John.

 

I have made many new friends through my one year association with the good folks at Crosswalk.com. I suspect that the cool redesign of the website will cause a few more to stumble into my cyberspace and ask the question that nearly everyone asks.

“Who the heck is Dave Burchett?” 

Because time is precious I have put together a linked list of the most popular articles I have written out of the over 300 times I have strode to the blog batter’s box and tried to connect with you, the reader.

These are the ten most read blogs that I have posted with a brief excerpt from each one. Sample one or two or ten by clicking on the title and see if this is a spot that you will want to revisit. I hope it is. But most of all I hope you find grace and joy as you follow Jesus today.

10) You have been warned!

I think I am going to start posting a warning label so the Spiritual Hall Monitors will be alerted to the fact that my blog may contain humor or, according to some, attempted humor. With this warning they can avoid encountering humor, satire, and sarcasm that might trigger an allergic reaction for the sullen saints.

Warning: The following post may contain humor. This blog was produced in a program where irony and satire are processed. May contain sarcasm fragments.

I think that singer Chris Rice may understand my plan to post the humor/satire warning.  

9) The Dangerous Lure of Celebrity Christianity

I have struggled for years with the concept that God somehow intervenes in athletic events. I have seen the post game interviews where athletes thank God for helping them make the big play or for helping their team win. And I wonder if God really chooses to get involved with sporting event outcomes. Does He sovereignly evaluate the two teams and inventory the number of Christians on the home team versus the visiting team? Is it quantity or spiritual maturity that determines the eventual outcome? Would God bless a team with 20 nominal Christians or the one with 10 really committed believers?

8) The Devil Didn’t Go Down to Georgia After All

Earl Wilson once said that “one way to get high blood pressure is to go mountain climbing over molehills”. If the following story were Jeopardy categories it would go something like this…
“Let’s go with ridiculous church and state objections for $50, Alex.” 

And then you would follow up with this category.
“I’ll take spectacular over reactions for $100, Alex.”

7) A Guaranteed Winning Exit Strategy

When I used to visit my family in Kentucky I remember the saying they used when someone thought a little differently.“That boy ain’t right!”, they would note with a smile and shake of the head.

That is how I feel today after my “ain’t right” brain somehow linked two widely disparate stories. Story number one was found in The Week Magazine and told about a growing number of multimillionaires who are leaving their money to themselves in the hope they will someday be brought back to life. The Wall Street Journal had originally reported that these very future investors are having themselves cryogenically frozen with the hope that medical advances will allow them to be revived.

6) Won the battle…losing the war?

The box office run of End of the Spear is likely drawing to a close. The backlash from a number of Christian blogs, publications, and from many  pulpits accomplished its goal. Estimates are that the controversy cut the box office return by one-half to two-thirds. I wish congratulations were in order. But I am simply burdened and discouraged by our choice of battles in the evangelical community.

5) Enroll now in the Canine School of Evangelism

I was taught to “dog” people about their faith. But maybe a ministry with mutts would be more effective to reach others with the message of the gospel. So I am thinking about starting a new seminary with man’s best friends as the instructors and role models for the students. My inspiration for this “hounds-on” approach to ministry training came from an article in American Way Magazine. The story was about dog training programs that have been implemented into prisons across America.

4) A gentle proposal to deal with Chad Allen, End of the Spear, Every Tribe Entertainment and especially one another

I have been reading with my usual mix of amusement, sadness, and disbelief the growing debate over the movie End of the Spear. Some in the Christian community have decided to grab the pitchforks, light the torches, and storm the gates of Every Tribe Entertainment, the production company behind the movie. In case you have been a cloistered monk until today I will give you a bit of background.

3) Confessing my agenda to Rosie O’Donnell

When I became aware that word of my Evangelical Christianity was out I went to the secret underground bunker where we all meet to plan how to advance our agenda.
“I have been Valerie Plumed!” I told the group.
“They know?”, they asked.
“I’m afraid so. Should I come clean?”
They looked horrified. “You mean tell them your agenda?”
“Yes,” I said boldly. “I am going to lay out my entire agenda so there will be no doubt.”

So here it is. I certainly don’t speak for all Evangelical Christians but I think I just might represent a number of them. Rosie, I am coming clean. Here is what I believe and my entire agenda.

2) Forgive? I don’t wanna…

One of the things that really struck me from the movie “End of the Spear” was that in the Waodani language, there is no word for forgiveness. The concept was so foreign to that culture that no word had ever been coined. In our Christian culture we have the word but we too often lack the ability to apply it. One of the joys of writing these daily ramblings is hearing from readers who are blessed or challenged by something I have written. Occasionally someone takes time out of their busy schedule to tell me I am an idiot. Isn’t it a waste of time to tell an idiot that he is an idiot? How can an idiot comprehend that? But I digress. The communications that are really hard for me are the ones from people who have been wounded by other people in the church or by church leaders. Those break my heart and such messages arrive far too often. Today was such a day.

1) Sentences that change your life

Most of life’s sentences are blissfully mundane. I can’t find my keys. Take out the garbage. Please feed the dog. I can’t find my keys. ADD readers will relate to that string of comments. But sometimes a single sentence will change your life. My bride of nearly thirty years dropped one of those sentences on me earlier this week.

“My spot was cancerous.”

After an optimistic initial briefing from the surgeon days earlier we were not prepared for the harsh reality of the pathology report. The  tumor is still small but the type of cancer is aggressive. The prognosis is optimistic but the journey will be hard. Yesterday I quoted that noted scholar and philosopher Mike Tyson who said, “Everyone has a game plan until they get hit in the mouth.”  That was how I felt after talking and crying with my wife. We are looking at a year of treatment and trials. But God is good and His grace is truly sufficient. How can you explain how forty eight hours later we can have such confidence and peace?

 

Hope you found something you enjoyed.

Blessings,

Dave

 

 

This Valentine’s Day is different. Oh, I have the same valentine but having her as my valentine means a little more this year. In just five weeks we will mark (not celebrate) the anniversary of diagnosis day. Having walked with Joni through eleven long months of chemotherapy and radiation has made my love and appreciation for her grow even deeper. I was listening to the old iPod today and a song by the Turtles summed up the current state of the marital union. Cue booming announcer voice…

Let’s take you back forty years to the spring of 1967 when a California rock group hit number one with this song…Happy Together.

I think about you day and night, it’s only right
To think about the girl you love and hold her tight
So happy together

I can’t see me lovin’ nobody but you
For all my life
When you’re with me, baby the skies’ll be blue
For all my life

We are so happy to be together. More than ever. Solomon wrote a chapter in Proverbs that is most often used to warn about avoiding temptation and the dangers that lurk with unfaithfulness. But lost in the negatives of that chapter is this wonderful bit of positive advice.

Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
      Rejoice in the wife of your youth.  Proverbs 5:18   NLT

I have often joked that I married my trophy wife first and got it over with. But the truth is that I did not always appreciate the bride that God had given me. Thank God I slowed down long enough to realize that I am blessed beyond measure by this incredible woman. I have censored the first part of verse nineteen because the advice there is a bit personal…not that there is anything wrong with it. (I am pretty sure I just drove many of you to Proverbs).

I will pick up with last part of the verse…

      May you always be captivated by her love.

I intend to do just that. She makes it easy.