Charisa Stories

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Soul Music…Soul Searching

I love the power of song lyrics to touch the heart. A song by Percy Sledge brought a spiritual connection to an old favorite tune. “When a Man Loves a Woman” reached number one on both the Billboard Hot 100 and the R&B charts in 1966. I remember when I fell in love with my beautiful wife. I totally identified with these lyrics in those halcyon days of young love.

When a man loves a woman
Can’t keep his mind on nothin’ else
He’d trade the world
For a good thing he’s found

When a man loves a woman
Spend his very last dime
Trying to hold on to what he needs
He’d give up all his comforts
And sleep out in the rain
If she said that’s the way
It ought to be

I give you everything I’ve got (yeah)
Trying to hold on
To your precious love

Could there be a more powerful description of how it feels to be giddy in love? You really can’t think of anything else but your new love. I reflected on this song in the context of my relationship with God. When I first became a Christian I was so happy, so relieved, and so grateful for His forgiveness. I really couldn’t keep my mind on nothin’ else except this new relationship with Jesus. I was so sold out to my relationship with God that I believe I would have traded the whole world for the good thing I’d found. But, much like romantic love, things can change over time if you are not careful.

I say I love Jesus but there are days that I hardly think about spiritual things. There are times when talking to God and praying feels like a burden. And I wonder if I would trade the world now for the good thing I’ve found in Jesus? My pew-litically correct answer is of course I would. Then why can it be so difficult to sacrifice even a little bit of my comfort for others? If I am truly willing to trade the whole world maybe I should have a few less possessions and and a lot more giving. Wouldn’t that be a true indicator of my love for God? Would I give my last dime (or at least more of my dimes) for Jesus? Or would I be like the rich young man of the Bible and turn away sadly at the cost He demands? Would I give up all my comforts if God called me to do that? Or would I rationalize that I can “do more” where I am? Do I give Him everything I’ve got?

But here is where this love relationship with Jesus is so different from the romantic love that Percy Sledge describes. The remarkable truth of grace is I don’t have to give everything to try and desperately hold on to God’s precious love. God’s love is always there when we enter into a faith relationship with Jesus. It was signed, sealed, and delivered at Calvary. When I accepted that gift of mercy I no longer had to try to hold on or earn that love. When a man loves God he does so out of gratitude because God extended grace to a person who did not deserve it. When a man (or woman) loves God there is no performance required to maintain His faith love.

But there is much that you can do to show it. You can give others the love and grace you have received so freely and abundantly.

“You can give without loving. But you cannot love without giving.”

That was the insightful quote from Amy Carmichael, a missionary to India. That is true when a man loves a woman. And it should be especially true when a man or woman loves God.

September 14, 2020
Is Grace Fair?

I write a lot about where our hope truly lies and how we need to be a positive light in a negative world. I came upon this wise advice for social media posters from the Gospel of John.

“Stop grumbling among yourselves,” Jesus answered. (John 6:43)

I laughed when I read that and thought this might become my new life verse for this very negative political season. The verse follows a section where Jesus talks about how He is the bread of life and has come from Heaven. This was just too much for the locals who knew Him as the kid raised by Mary and Joseph down at the carpenter shop. But the message is timeless. I need to stop grumbling and start living out of who God says I am as His child. Maybe that is why God calls me His child because I sure can be childish at times.

The grumbling verse reminded me of one of my favorite grace parables. A vineyard owner hired some workers early in the morning to help bring in the harvest. Jesus continues the story.

“At five o’clock that afternoon he was in town again and saw some more people standing around. He asked them, ‘Why haven’t you been working today?’ “They replied, ‘Because no one hired us.’ “The landowner told them, ‘Then go out and join the others in my vineyard. (Matthew 20:6-7)

So far the story is nice. A kind and compassionate man wants to help some poor folks who had no work. They could work an hour and at least get a tiny bit for their effort. But Jesus is about to turn the “fairness” doctrine over like a table in the Temple.

“That evening he told the foreman to call the workers in and pay them, beginning with the last workers first. When those hired at five o’clock were paid, each received a full day’s wage. When those hired first came to get their pay, they assumed they would receive more. But they, too, were paid a day’s wage. When they received their pay, they protested to the owner, ‘Those people worked only one hour, and yet you’ve paid them just as much as you paid us who worked all day in the scorching heat.’
“He answered one of them, ‘Friend, I haven’t been unfair! Didn’t you agree to work all day for the usual wage? Take your money and go. I wanted to pay this last worker the same as you. Is it against the law for me to do what I want with my money? Should you be jealous because I am kind to others?’
“So those who are last now will be first then, and those who are first will be last.” (Matthew 20:8-16, NLT)

Can’t you just see it? The grumbling of the sweaty and exhausted all day workers decrying that they had been treated unfairly yet the truth is they got exactly the wage they agreed upon. I wondered about the reaction of the latecomers. Did they gloat about their luck? I don’t think so. I imagine they wept at the kindness of an unmerited gift given by a unexpectedly kind man. At 4 pm they faced the prospect of going home with nothing to provide for their family but two hours later they had been given, not earned, a full days wage! Think of the joy as the men went home and excitedly told about this amazing generosity. The family likely gathered around and touched the denarius like a sacred gift from Heaven. What a contrast of joy from a once forgotten group of men juxtaposed against the grumbling of the people who had done the “right” thing and expected to be treated better. What a picture of grace! We don’t earn grace by a full day or one hour effort. Grace is a gift. Grace is an unearned gift of love to be savored, appreciated, and treasured. Brennan Manning wrote about the incomprehensibility of grace to the American mindset.

My life is a witness to vulgar grace — a grace that amazes as it offends. A grace that pays the eager beaver who works all day long the same wage as the grinning drunk who shows up at ten till five. A grace that hikes up the robe and runs breakneck toward the prodigal reeking of sin and wraps him up and decides to throw a party, no ifs, ands, or buts. A grace that raises bloodshot eyes to a dying thief’s request — “Please, remember me” — and assures him, “You bet!”…This vulgar grace is indiscriminate compassion. It works without asking anything of us. It’s not cheap. It’s free, and as such will always be a banana peel for the orthodox foot and a fairy tale for the grown-up sensibility. Grace is sufficient even though we huff and puff with all our might to try and find something or someone that it cannot cover. Grace is enough…

Indeed.

My old nature screams that people who make bad decisions over and over get what they “deserve.” They don’t “deserve” to be pursued and loved and restored. They made their bed—now let them lie in it. But there is a small quiet voice in my heart that tells me that they have value. That they are loved by their Creator. And that voice asks who am I to decide who “deserves” anything? Did I “deserve” this amazing gift? The honest answer is no way. Remembering that amazing grace bestowed makes it way easier to love and treat kindly that person who disagrees with you.

Would you open the outrageous gift of grace and accept it as a mind blowing outpouring of love from a Father who delights in you? Grace doesn’t make sense. Grace is outrageous. And the amazing thing I find over and over is this simple truth. Grace changes hearts. It is the word the church in America needs to model more than ever. We are given inexhaustible grace. We have more than enough to share.

September 6, 2020
The Gift of Being Present

To celebrate the paperback release of Stay this week’s article is a free preview of one of my favorite chapters.

Chapter 3 from STAY: Lessons My Dogs Taught Me about Life, Loss, and Grace

BE PRESENT– Journal Entry

One reason Hannah is such a special friend is that she entered our lives during a difficult season when her human mom—my wife, Joni—was diagnosed with breast cancer. Hannah provided a comforting presence during a scary time. I found an anonymous quote that sums up one big reason why: “One reason a dog can be such a comfort when you’re feeling blue is that she doesn’t try to find out why.”

Hannah knew how to deal with people going through an emotionally and physically draining valley. Her solution was simple but powerful.

Be present.

It was just the unsolicited encouragement that Joni and I so needed at the time. When this cancer journey began, we learned a lot of hard lessons. One of the hardest to swallow was people’s reactions, how those close to us dealt with tragedy and illness. We had expectations of who would be there for us during the storm, but those expectations were rarely correct. Some people that we were sure would be steadfast became invisible. Others who we would have wagered the mortgage on to be constant encouragers became awkward and distant. When your expectations are met with inconsistent responses from friends and family, it can devastate your spirit and lead to despair.

Although reasons were never given, I could guess why people struggled with our situation, based on the unique baggage they brought to their own story. Perhaps cancer made them fear their own mortality. Some acted as if cancer is contagious. Perhaps they worried they might say the wrong thing. Others might have felt pressure to make sense of a senseless situation or the need to figure out the spiritual reason for the trial, and when they had no answer to give us, they retreated. I understand all that now, but at the time it hurt.

That’s what Hannah sensed. Her intuitive evaluation of my emotions was uncanny. Hannah would come to me and nudge me as if to say, “I’m here.” As she shifted her big brown eyes toward mine, her gaze communicated, “I don’t know how to help, but I wish I could.”

There was incredible comfort in her presence.

She was right. That was all I needed—presence. When Joni was sick with cancer, all we needed from friends and fellow followers of Jesus was caring presence.

The theology of why bad things happen could wait. The go-to verse that “all things work together for good” (Romans 8:28, KJV) could be explored when time gave perspective. You don’t need to explain or spiritualize trials. You need to be present and willing to walk with your friend or loved one in grace and love. Simple, yet incredibly powerful.

Remember me mentioning Job and his suffering in the introduction? At first, Job’s friends were fantastic empathizers. When they simply sat with Job and grieved with him, I am sure he took comfort in these men who cared enough to be present. But then they decided to speak their piece. They resorted to the familiar default mode of needing to “figure out” what Job did to trigger his suffering. They tried to explain what they could not understand.

We had a few “Job friends” in our cancer journey. God was faithful to provide caring people to walk with Joni and me. We thanked Him for those He prompted to love us, instead of wondering why others were not there. That was a spiritual turning point for us.

During Joni’s cancer, Hannah obviously had no idea why we were sad. She had no more understanding of Joni’s disease than she would later have of her own prognosis. But she could sense our sorrow and she was present in the moment.

Joni’s breast cancer treatment included surgery and a year of chemotherapy followed by weeks of radiation. We joked about our weekly dates at the “Slow-Drip Spa,” but there was not much humor to be found in the aftermath of those sessions. Joni fought nausea and her plummeting white blood cell counts were dangerously low, compromising her recovery. One day after we returned home from Joni’s chemotherapy session, she went straight to the bedroom, exhausted, to try to sleep off the nausea. I sat on the couch in our living room staring at nothing as I tried to process all that Joni was going through.

Hannah sensed my sadness but wasn’t sure what to do. She walked by, looked at me, picked up a tennis ball, and brought it to me. I could see a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. I imagined a thought bubble appearing over her head with the message, “Would this help make you less sad?”

I tossed the ball to her, but she did not play with the normal zeal that she had during our games of catch.

This day Hannah caught the ball, calmly brought it back, and gently dropped it in my lap. It was as if she was doing this for me and not her. She was giving me a few moments of respite from my fears. I don’t recall another time that she played in that way.

I agree with Martin Luther’s thoughts: “The dog is the most faithful of animals and would be much esteemed were it not so common. Our Lord God has made his greatest gifts the commonest.”

I think God has given us a model of walking, breathing grace in these amazing creatures.

The empathetic instinct to pain that my friend Hannah possesses can be a template for how I can be present with God. There are times when my baggage or fear causes me to be awkward and distant from God. I am not sure what to say or even if God wants to deal with my weak faith again. I am tempted to talk bravely as if nothing is wrong. But my heart is crying out in pain. God comforts me in the brave talking, but He rushes toward the crying of my soul. I think that is what the apostle Paul is describing in Romans, assuring us that the Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf when we are too anguished to even find words:

The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will. – Romans 8:26-27

The Holy Spirit senses our hearts and literally interprets our anguish to the Father. God desires that we simply be present with Him. We don’t need to pray eloquent psalms of petition. We simply put our heads in the lap of Abba Father and say, “I’m here.” And isn’t it interesting that it is in this very intimate context of submission and tender dependence on the Holy Spirit that the oft-quoted phrase about how “all things work together for good” occurs?

The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God’s own will. And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. – Romans 8:26-28, emphasis added

We isolate the verse about “everything working for good” from its context and throw it out as “comfort” for those who are suffering. Paul says that God is with us in our suffering, not just for one specific event, but for all of the trials we will face in our lives. All of them will be ultimately redeemed for those who love God.

The purpose of our trials is not necessarily to have things work out neatly, according to our desires. Romans 8:29 says, “God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to become like his Son.” God chose believers to become like His Son. All of these trials together will cause us to become more like Jesus. That may or may not mean a particular event will work out well. How often have we wounded a hurting soul with our shallow spiritualizing when he or she just needed a friend?

It starts with being present, a lesson well taught by my friend Hannah. She gave me a clear example of being present when your friend is hurting. Just be present. Not all-knowing. Not awkwardly fumbling for words. Simply present. Learning to be present for a friend or a loved one is a precious skill. Henri Nouwen captures this heart of friendship well.

“When we honestly ask ourselves which persons in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not-knowing, not-curing, not-healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is the friend who cares.”
Henri Nouwen

Tonight I got into bed late, and Hannah got up from her comfy bed and walked to my side. Maybe she needed my presence. Maybe she sensed my need for a therapeutic ear scratch. I suspect the truth is that both of us had needs that were met by that simple action of presence and affection. That is how it works when we drop our fears and selfishness to make ourselves lovingly present in a loved one’s pain. It is therapeutic for everyone involved.

During Joni’s difficult cancer trial we learned that the peace that surpasses all understanding is real. We lived it and we got through a very trying year by leaning on each other, great doctors, good friends, God’s grace, and lots of Hannah nuzzles.

August 30, 2020
Don’t Let Wounded Souls Drift Away…

Dave Burchett

Drift Away from Dobie Gray cycled up on my music playlist this week.

Day after day I’m more confused
So I look for the light in the pouring rain
You know that’s a game that I hate to lose
I’m feelin’ the strain, ain’t it a shame

Those lyrics cause me to reflect on the millions of emotionally lonely and hurting people during this weird and trying season. They are definitely feelin’ the strain. I see the fear and angst from so many on social media. I know that many feel alone. Where is God? Where is His community? Where is the light in the pouring rain? Sometimes our faith community can feel discouraging and distant. We all know that people will let you down. Perhaps they are carrying burdens unknown to you and me. But many others do care. And God cares deeply about your pain. If you are feeling alone I encourage you to cry out to God and reach out to others for help. This week some folks reached out to me and I was honored and blessed to share their journey. Those of us who are in a good place right now can pray that the Holy Spirit will lead us to those who are hurting and/or give them the freedom to reach out to us. When we love others sacrificially it really helps wounded souls to navigate this storm. Paul described how that looks.

Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically. Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all! (Romans 12:9-16, NLT)

Saint Francis of Assisi is said to have observed that we should “preach the gospel at all times…if necessary, use words.” I have personally witnessed the power of letting the gospel message flow out of loving actions and not out of condemnation and judgement.

Sorry for the detour. Back to Dobie Gray.

Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

I guess all of us are looking for something to free our souls. I have found that in Jesus. We can look at the same evidence for faith and reach a different conclusion. Eventually it comes down to a step of faith. I examined the issue and decided that God exists. Then I examined what that means in my life. I came to believe that Jesus is the Son of God who came to redeem me.

A final note to anyone who finds this site and believes that all Christians are judgmental and mean. Not gonna lie to you. Some are. Jesus is still working on all of us. But if you want a place of grace filled and honest discussion I hope you will become a regular here. We have much to discuss.

My latest book, Waking Up Slowly, can be used as a 21 Day Journey to become more connected with God, one another and yourself.

No performance demands…just grace suggestions based on God’s Word. Would you join me on that journey? Click here to check it out.

August 23, 2020
Lessons from Covid Class
Life is full of wonderful moments and blessings. Life also has it’s share of dark valleys and scary storms. None of us gets out of this life unscathed. In the valleys of my life I have taught myself to step back and ask this question. What can God teach me in this trial about Him or about myself?

This seemingly never ending Covid pandemic has been rife with lessons.

Lesson #1

Control freaks have learned a really hard truth from Covid-19. It doesn’t matter one whit how much money, power, or prestige you had accumulated by March of 2020 because Covid rudely stole your ability to control your life. It is funny to search the term “control freak” on the internet and find that so many people try to paint being a controlling person as a positive. I have worked with control freaks and I can tell you the experience for those around them is not pleasant. It is a suffocating and deflating leadership style.

This is a particularly distressing trait for followers of Jesus. I think this unpredictable virus exposed a lot of us. We said we trusted God. We wore t-shirts that boldly proclaimed Faith over Fear. But having our health, financial security, and fellowship with others threatened rocked our faith to the core. The only honest reaction is no matter how hard we try to control things we simply cannot. Only God is in control and our attempts to think otherwise is fool’s gold. Author Wayne Dyer said this about the folly of control.

“It makes no sense to worry about things you have no control over because there’s nothing you can do about them, and why worry about things you do control? The activity of worrying keeps you immobilized.”

I have seen that truth played out over and over during this season. People of faith are immobilized by fear and worry. I am not diminishing one iota the reality or seriousness of this virus. I am saying that the One in ultimate control will get me through this crisis just like He has been at my side through every other one. Jesus promised He would be steadfast and present in every moment. Covid has not changed that truth.

“My sheep recognize my voice. I know them, and they follow me. I give them real and eternal life. They are protected from the Destroyer for good. No one can steal them from out of my hand. The Father who put them under my care is so much greater than the Destroyer and Thief. No one could ever get them away from him. I and the Father are one heart and mind.” (John 10:27-30, The Message)

I am not in control. Never have been. Never will be. It is nice to know that the one thing I can control is my eternal destiny in Christ.

Lesson # 2

We really, really, really need one another. Virtual replaced actual contact and at first that seemed okay. The dictionary definition of virtual is revealing.

adjective: virtual
1. almost or nearly as described, but not completely or according to strict definition.
The key word in that description is ALMOST. Virtual is not the same as real contact. The Zoom meetings and Skype calls only vaguely resemble actual interaction and I was surprised at how quickly that substitute failed to satisfy my need for fellowship.

God designed us for human relationships when He proclaimed it is not good for us to be alone. Adam didn’t come up with that idea. It was the creator who knew how His creation was wired.

Henri Nouwen brilliantly summarized the need for community.

“Christian community is the place where we keep the flame of hope alive among us and take it seriously so that it can grow and become stronger in us.”

Covid extinguished that flame. We lost that comforting touch or reassuring facial expression that helped fan the flame of hope. Losing community was a bigger deal than most of us imagined. Peter wrote about suffering and even the prospect of the final days. I find it interesting that Peter made this the most important task in those dire circumstances.

“Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8, NLT)

We can do that. We can’t control our circumstances. But we can express love through phone calls, messages, and safely distanced encounters. Knowing that you are loved and missed helps a lot. Whenever a person comes to mind send a text or drop a note. You never know how much that brief time detour might mean to someone.

Lesson #3

We need to be patient with all of the different responses our fellow sojourners have to this pandemic. This is the hard one for me. There are some really judgmental and harsh indictments of people who view how we should address this virus differently. I really believe that most of us are trying to do the right thing in a very confusing sea of conflicting information. So I default to Paul’s words to the church at Colossae when I feel frustration with some folks responses.

Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father. (Colossians 3:13-17, NLT)

If I marinate in that passage it seems that my judgment and frustration melt away allowing grace to bubble up. Those are my lessons from Covid. What have you learned?
August 16, 2020
Don’t Let Covid Cause a Fruit Shortage!

I have some mileage on the life odometer and I can honestly say I have never experienced a season like the one we are currently in. The late sixties were pretty wheels off but even that turbulent time didn’t match this. Instead of uniting as Americans over a pandemic we have divided. Isolation and fear have caused a collective national depression.

Christians have too often been a part of the problem. In theory we have a message of hope in Christ. We should be a light of courage because we know and trust a loving God. Instead we too often get sidetracked by arguments over wearing masks and whether we should be meeting without restriction. The sound you hear is Satan chuckling that we are missing a chance to show grace, hope, love, and courage.

How can we make that kind of difference? Paul has an annoying suggestion that if walk in relationship with Jesus you should display the traits he called the fruit of the spirit.

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things! Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another. (Galatians 5, NLT)

This is not a shopping list where I can pick one or two and feel pretty good about my godliness. The desire is to display all of the fruit and not just one or two.

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Imagine how our witness would explode if we lived out of that list. What would our conversations look like at work if we went fruit shopping in expectant prayer each day? How would our social media posts read? What would these traits mean in our family relationships? How would others view your faith if these qualities were your selling points?

I am not peddling guilt here. Living this way is impossible by simple grit and begrudging compliance. It is possible only through understanding God’s grace and kindness toward His children.

Slowly I am beginning to comprehend grace and who I am in Christ. Here is a valuable insight from the book The Search For Significance by Robert S. McGee.

“Our true value is based not on our behavior or the approval of others but on what God’s word says is true. Our behavior is often a reflection of our beliefs about who we are. It is usually consistent with what we think to be true about ourselves (Prov 23:7). If we base our worth solidly on the truths of God’s word, then our behavior will often reflect His love, grace, and power. But if we base our worth on our abilities or the fickle approval of others, then our behavior will reflect the insecurity, fear, and anger that comes from such instability.”

When I trust who God says I am I begin to stock the fruit of the Spirit in my heart. God declares all of the following list to be true about me…a broken down former TV director. And all of these things became true from the MOMENT I trusted Christ. I didn’t earn any of these through my efforts.

I am forgiven. Col 2:13–14
I am a child of God. John 1:2; Rom 8:15
I received Christ’s KIND of life, eternal: John 5:24
I was delivered from Satan’s domain and into the Kingdom of Christ: Col 1:13
Christ came to dwell with me. Col 1:27; Rev 3:20
I am a new Creation: 2 Cor 5:17
I am declared righteous by God: 2 Cor 5:21
I entered a love relationship w/ God: 1 John 4:9-11
I am accepted by God: Col 1:19-22

When I meditate on those truths my heart overflows with gratitude. I am reminded how much I have been forgiven, I marvel at how patient Jesus has been with my excruciatingly slow growth. I stand in amazement that God chose to adopt me as His child. I remember that the negative things that Satan reminds me of everyday no longer define me. I am righteous in the eyes of a Holy God because of the finished work of Jesus on the Cross.

Consistently demonstrating the fruit of the Spirit is not easy. But I have found it is whole lot easier when you remember the truths above. Don’t let Covid spoil your fruit. We have a hope that others need and displaying the fruit of the Spirit makes the message attractive and real.

August 9, 2020
A Football Coach Showed Me How to Leave a Legacy

At some point in our journey most people start thinking about leaving a legacy. For some the idea of leaving a legacy means accumulating wealth or property to give to the next generation. A family business can be a legacy that keeps a memory alive through the years. Prestige and power can be thought of as a legacy.

In the winter of 2017 I became friends with Newton Texas high school football Coach W.T. Johnston. His story of courage and faith became the basis of my book “Between the White Lines“. For eighteen months the Johnston family embedded me in their lives and shared their story with unvarnished honesty. I had no idea how much that project and that relationship would influence me.

I had thought now and then about my legacy. I had always factored my accomplishments into legacy. I had a long and satisfying television directing career. I was fortunate to win a few awards. But the fact is that the moment I stood up to leave that directing chair another person was ready to sit down. The telecasts went on just fine without me. W.T. taught me that leaving a legacy was not about accomplishment. Perhaps the most emotional moment of my career happened after Johnston won an improbable second consecutive state title several months after doctors told him he would be dead. His interview on Fox Sports has been seen by millions and it helped shape how I plan to live the rest of my life. Here is a bit of that remarkable sideline moment.

“We got together in August right before we started practicing and I told them I probably wouldn’t make it through the season. I was only given eight months to live in January. And I wanted them to be aware of what was going on. And then we got going and there was about two or three weeks during the season I didn’t think I was going to make it. And we talked about that.
“I always told them this was the last lesson I was gonna teach them. I’ve been around these guys and their dads and their mothers since 1991. And I told them the last lesson I would ever teach them is how to live before you die, and where you put your strength and where you put your belief. The Lord has done so much for me. It’s unbelievable what Jesus has let me do and see through these kids. And I tell everybody—they don’t understand this—I’ve been given a great gift. I’ve been able to see how my life could affect people before I die. These guys, they’ve touched my life. It’s been a mutual thing. But I’ve been able to teach them a lesson that you don’t get to see most times.
“Last night they were talking about wanting to win for me. I’ve had my time. This is their time. This is all for them. I told them to do it for their teammates, to do it for themselves. Because fifty years from now, this will be something special they’ll always remember. I mean, they’ll remember me—if I’ve done right, a part of me is going to live in them and that’s what I’ve always thought—if I’ve done things right.”

What a succinct and brilliant definition of leaving a legacy. If I’ve done things right a part of me is going to live in them.

Leaving a legacy is not getting to the top of your profession. It is not being the most successful or the most wealthy. Billy Graham had a pretty good resume. It is estimated he spoke to over 200 million people in live audiences over sixty years. He wrote over thirty books. His television and radio programming reached millions more with the Gospel of Jesus. I would say that is a pretty powerful legacy. But here is how Graham defined the word.

The greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.

That is the legacy I hope to leave. Leaving a legacy is being kind to people who can do nothing for you. Leaving a legacy is being fair to everyone and not just the powerful and privileged. Leaving a legacy is making each person you engage feel important and valued. Leaving a legacy is serving selflessly with no expectation for reward. Leaving a legacy is loving your wife, children, friends, and neighbors with forgiveness, patience, humility, and grace. Leaving a legacy is modeling what it looks like to walk with Jesus faithfully through both triumph and tragedy.

Peter talked about how to live in dark times.

Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. Cheerfully share your home with those who need a meal or a place to stay. God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.

(1 Peter 4:8-10, NLT)

Another coach I admire, Tony Dungy, said this about legacy and significance.

God’s definition of success is really one of significance-the significant difference our lives can make in the lives of others. The significance doesn’t show up in won-loss records, long resumes, or the trophies gathering dust on our mantels. It’s found in the hearts and lives of those we’ve come across who are in some way better because of the way we lived.

Paul offered a good starting point for this legacy project in his letter to the Church at Philipi.

Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. (Philippians 4:8, NLT)

If you live like that you will find that my friend W.T. Johnston is one-hundred percent correct when he said a piece of you will live in others forever.

Missing football? Between the White Lines is an inspiring story of a great coach and how faith challenged and changed a town and team.

August 3, 2020