Charisa Stories

Tag: grace

Finding Peace in Dark Valleys

No one gets through this journey unscathed. We will all face sadness, struggles, worry, sickness, and death. When I face trials I default to a song titled “Hold Me Jesus” from Rich Mullins. He is with Jesus now but Rich Mullins’s ability to capture our faith journey in lyric form was remarkable.

Well, sometimes my life
Just don’t make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

Right now I am in a pretty good place in my life and journey with Jesus. But a heartbreaking number of my friends and loved ones are going through agonizing struggles and can relate completely to those lyrics. Rich Mullen’s words do not exaggerate the pain.

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It’s so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

I used to respond to troubles by thinking it must be my fault somehow. God must not be pleased with me. I would decide I had to do something to bolster my faith. I needed to read more verses or do a study or pray more or believe more. But the answer was far more simple and the chorus by Mullins nails it. All I needed was to rest in the love of God.

So hold me Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won’t You be my Prince of Peace

I needed to quit flailing and trying so darn hard to be righteous. Hold me Jesus. Won’t you be my Prince of Peace? In those moments this prayer is simple and profound.

“God…would you love me today?”

And He does. I don’t have to “do stuff” for God to earn His favor and receive His love and peace. For those of us “doers” who absolutely must do something here is your homework assignment.

1. Believe what God says is true about you.

That’s it. That is your assignment and it may not be as easy as it looks in print. Believe you are forgiven. Believe you are loved. Believe you are His child. Believe you are adopted. Believe you are redeemed. Believe you are a new creation.

I have made it so stinkin’ complicated and performance based for so many years. When I trust what God says about me I am humbled. I worship. Believing how my Father sees me causes me to obey out of gratitude and not teeth gritting compliance.

Why did I fight this amazing grace and His unconditional love? Well, Rich Mullins nails that too.

Surrender don’t come natural to me
I’d rather fight You for something
I don’t really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I’ve beat my head against so many walls
Now I’m falling down, I’m falling on my knees

That was me. Beating my head against a performance wall instead of surrendering to the extravagant gift of grace and freedom. Next time you are flailing and striving to please God would you try this simple request?

“Jesus…would you love me today?” He has promised to be there.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28, NLT)

Hold me Jesus. I want to rest in your love today.

February 21, 2022
Life Is Too Short To…
A couple of weeks ago I wrote about quitting negativity. It’s hard to stop griping cold turkey but I am doing better. Recently I have had some honest conversations that showed me the debilitating impact of a negative spirit.

One person shared his deep hatred for people of one political persuasion. Another felt totally hopeless about the divisions in our culture.

I shared with both that my hope was in Christ and not in Washington. I pray that I planted a seed of hope in their hearts. Those conversations generated two strong emotions. I was deeply saddened that my friends did not share my hope in Christ. And I was more convinced than ever that I want to be a positive light in this increasingly dark world.

Last year I became aware of a very talented songwriter/singer from my hometown of Chillicothe, Ohio. Jerry Salley writes songs that inspire and give hope. One of my favorites is titled “Add More Life to My Days” and you can hear it on Jerry’s CD Bridges and Backroads. The lyric starts with a unrealistic wish for life.

I wish we all could live at least until we’re 90
Without any aches, or pains, or a cloudy mind
I wish everyone could taste the kind of love they dream of finding
And get to see their ship come sailin’ in at least one time

Wouldn’t that be wonderful? But Jerry knows the truth of life on this fallen planet.

I’ve been here long enough to know
That ain’t the way it always goes

Jesus never promised all smooth sailing as we waited for our ship to come in.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matthew 6:34, NLT)

Tomorrow will bring worries and troubles? Where is our hope in that? Jesus has the answer.

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33, NLT)

Jesus tells me to not worry about future troubles. He promises peace and victory over the world. One more promise from Jesus is found in Matthew 6:33.

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously,
and he will give you everything you need.

That doesn’t mean live perfectly. It simply means to be humble, trust God, love one another, and He will provide your needs. We misunderstand that promise if we think that means getting everything you want. What a promise to hang on to in these difficult times that the God of creation will provide my daily needs.

The chorus of Jerry Salley’s song talks about the uncertainty of our lifespan. But he does have a wonderful suggestion for the days we are given.

So if I’m one of those travelers whose journeys gets cut short
And leave the ones I leave behind wishin’ I had more time
All I can say is I can’t add more days to my life
So I’ll add more life to my days

I love that. I can’t personally add a single minute to my life but I can choose to add more life to the time I am granted. I can definitely choose to be present and joyful each day. Every day is a gift of grace. I believe everyday has sacred moments so I can pray the Holy Spirit will give me eyes to see and savor those moments. Paul was sitting in a Roman prison as he finished his letter to the Church at Philippi. Could there be a more unlikely circumstance to coin these words to his fellow sojourners?

Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! (Philippians 4:4, NLT)

So if you want to add more life to your days here is a little checklist.
- Quit worrying about tomorrow.
- Be joyful in the Lord. Rejoice!
- Look for sacred moments everyday.
- Love God and one another.
And for today’s conclusion I give Paul the final word.

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. ⁹Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you. (Philippians 4:8-9)
February 7, 2022
I’m Done!

I have reached and exceeded my saturation point.

I’m done.

Done with what? I am done with negativity. Our leaders, the media, and social media platforms spend a ridiculous percentage of their energy on what is wrong with this world. Their solutions are often soul-sucking condemnation, judgement, and summary dismissal of people who simply ask questions. Perhaps the most distressing thing is that many in the church have fallen into the same dark space. Christian social media responses to cultural and doctrinal issues may be slightly less profane but not much, if any, less negative.

Brothers and sisters, we are supposed to be light! But please don’t take my word for it. Your argument is with Jesus.

“In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will
praise your heavenly Father.” (Matthew 5:16, NLT)

What I see too often is this very sad paraphrase of His words demonstrated through social media platforms.

“Let my sharp words shame or demean you so that everyone will see how clever I am and praise me.”

Paul addressed why we should be eager to be light in the world in Ephesians 5:8.

“For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light!“

My heart breaks when I see how many followers of Christ seem to have forgotten they were once full of darkness. It is only because of God’s grace that you have light.

So I am done with negativity and it is not because I am naive about the condition of the world. I am done with negativity precisely because of the condition of the world. This hurting, fearful populace needs hope, light, and grace. They need the positive message of the Good News. That is my goal for the rest of my days. I feel quite comfortable that the negative side will be well represented by countless others.

Everyday I need to make choices.

I can be judgmental or I can be joyful.
I can be pessimistic or I can be prayerful.
I can be condemning or I can be caring.
I can be fearful or I can be faithful.
I can be grace-filled or I can be graceless.

We make those choices and I know they are not easy. Making the choice to eat better is hard. Making the choice to work out is even harder for me. Those are decisions with good but temporal benefits. But making the choice to be a positive, loving light in this world has eternal impact. Warren Wiersbe is one of my favorite writers. His book Be Joyful: Philippians): Even When Things Go Wrong, You Can Have Joy is a great study to reorient your negativity.

“When you have the single mind, you look on your circumstances as God-given opportunities for the furtherance of the gospel, and you rejoice at what God is going to do instead of complaining about what God did not do.”― Warren W. Wiersbe

That response ain’t natural my friends. That is a mindset based on who God is. It is a choice grounded on the grace He has lavishly given to each one of His children. I’m done with negativity. I don’t know if I have two weeks or two decades left on this planet but I don’t want to spend my time wallowing in pessimism. I remember joking with my television production crew a few years ago that I was in the 4th quarter of life. One of my dear, encouraging friends said this with a smile on his face. “What if you’re in overtime?” That could well be but no matter how much time is on the life clock I want to be a positive light. I want to remember and live out the truth of John 13:35.

“Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

The choice to love and be light is infinitely more important than winning online arguments, getting social media likes, and racking up followers. I want to be a loving light for the Good News of the gospel. Anyone want to join me?

January 31, 2022
The Devastating Toll of Anxiety and Worry

I see a lot of worried people around me. Worried about the pandemic. Worried about the national division. Worried about international tensions. Worried about all kinds of things. But this old proverb rings true today.

“Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere.”

As I get older I experience more and more how practical Scripture is for daily living. In the teaching of my youth the Bible was a book of lofty and seemingly impossible demands to behave in a way that would please God. Now I see that the Bible is a love story where Jesus met those impossible demands on my behalf. I see now that my simple faith and trust pleases God. And I see a practical book that shows me how to find joy during this temporary journey on earth. The Designer knew when we left the factory that worry is destructive. The study above merely confirms what Jesus said a couple of millenia ago.

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?” (Matthew 6:25-27, NLT)

Jesus continues in the same message.

“So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need. So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” (Matthew, 6:31-34)

Our Designer knew something else. Most of what we consume ourselves with never happens or is not worth getting anxious about. Modern research verifies ancient wisdom.

A research study examined how many times an imagined calamity actually came to pass. In this study, subjects were asked to write down their worries over an extended period of time and then identify which of their imagined misfortunes did not actually happen.

The remarkable results came back that 85 percent of what subjects worried about never happened! Slow down and digest that. Eighty-five percent of what we work ourselves into varied states of frenzy about never even happens. And here is the even more remarkable finding. For the 15 percent of the worry agenda that did happen, nearly 80 percent of the respondents reported they were able to deal with the concern better than expected or they learned a valuable lesson from the event. So 97 percent of what the majority of this study group worried about was not worth wasting the energy, faith and time.

Worry is exactly where the Enemy wants to keep the children of God. Living in fear of the future cheats you out of today. A precious moment tugs on your heart like a child at your sleeve. Too often you miss that moment concerning yourself with something that likely won’t happen or will happen in a way that your worry can not change.

For those of you who struggle with worry maybe it helps to remember that your Heavenly Father is always on the job. Worry is not an attribute of our God. I suspect that it grieves His heart that we are paralyzed with worry when our Father is calling us to know Him, trust Him and rest in Him.

Trusting Jesus for tomorrow, next week, next year and forever frees us to see what this moment holds. No amount of worry will change the fact that we will face death, adversity and sadness.

As a young believer one of my favorite artists was Andrae Crouch. His lyrics powerfully showed how God uses trials to help us mature in our faith.

I’ve had many tears and sorrows
I’ve had questions for tomorrow
There’s been times I didn’t know right from wrong
But in every situation
God gave me blessed consolation
That my trials come to only make me strong

Through it all
Through it all
I’ve learned to trust in Jesus
I’ve learned to trust in God

Through it all
Through it all
I’ve learned to depend upon His Word

I pray that all of us learn to trust in Jesus and depend upon His Word in this difficult season.

Much of this article was excerpted from Waking Up Slowly. The book discusses 21 different actions or attitudes that disconnect you from God and others. Check it out here.

January 24, 2022
Time For A Heart Demo Day?

Fixer Upper with Chip and Joanna Gaines has made Waco, Texas a tourist destination. Who saw that coming? People come from all over the country to visit the Magnolia Silos, shops, and restaurant. One of the fun parts of every Fixer Upper episode is “Demo Day”. Joanna evaluates the home to see what needs to go. Sometimes a wall needs to be knocked down. Sometimes a kitchen island is removed. Sometimes cabinets or shelves are destroyed and more stylish and efficient units are put in place. Sometimes floors are ripped up and foundations shored up.

Chip Gaines loves demolition day. He comes in wielding a sledge hammer and a gigantic smile as he destroys sheet rock and fixtures.

If you didn’t know what the end goal was it would look like vandalism. Knocking down a wall and leaving an enormous mess doesn’t look like a great plan at first glance. It is only when you see how removing that wall opens up the room that you see the method to Chip’s hammering madness. It is only when you see the beautiful remake of a kitchen that you understand why the original island and cabinets were smashed into kindling. The deconstruction makes sense only when you see how much better the house looks and functions afterwards.

More than ever it feels like we need the Holy Spirit to be the fixer-upper of our hearts. The divisions in our church and culture have made the need for heart renewal urgent. Our cry should echo the Psalmist.

Create in me a clean heart, O God.
Renew a loyal spirit within me. (Psalm 51:10, NLT)

We should all desire a clean heart that allows the Holy Spirit to move unencumbered in our lives. But the truth is we probably all need a demo day now and then. Maybe you need to knock down some walls of pride that keep the Spirit of God from moving freely in our hearts. God desires to give His children grace to love and forgive others. But sometimes we have to clear some space.

And he gives grace generously. As the Scriptures say,

“God opposes the proud
but gives grace to the humble.” (James 4:6. NLT)

Demolish the walls of pride to make space for humility and your heart will become a much more friendly place for your family, friends, and community.

Perhaps you need to rearrange some things in your heart. Clear out those cabinets that stored worthless things and rebuild it with lots of storage for God’s Word.

I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. (Psalm 119:11, NET)

The demo process can be messy. But if you are committed to clearing out walls and strongholds that hinder your walk with the Lord I am convinced He will meet you there to reconstruct a clean heart. Don’t be afraid of demo days. Maybe we should show up with a smile of trust on our face knowing that God’s rebuild is worth the mess.

January 17, 2022
The Reset Button We Need For 2022

I think we are just beginning to recognize and unpack the damage caused by the pandemic lock downs. The separation of friends and families from normal interaction has left it’s toll on the culture. I would argue the effect has been even more profound on the church. If you are/were a faithful church participant you had likely bought into the truth that we need one another on this journey. Many of us have sacrificed that gift of one another to this insidious virus. I have seen responses and behaviors from churchgoers that surprised even me and I wrote a book called When Bad Christians Happen to Good People! I think the isolation may have exposed some baggage that had been buried under busyness and routine. More on that in next week’s musing.

I am suggesting that we need to admit this separation has had a negative effect on most of us. It feels like patience is in record short supply and it is not a supply chain issue. The actions and words of others seem to agitate us more easily. The ability to discuss difficult topics with civility has become almost impossible. I don’t think those trends were a result of the pandemic but I do think its emotional and spiritual effect exacerbated it.

So what do we do? Today I wanted to propose a reset button we can push to help reconfigure our hearts.

Years ago an office supply company promoted a big red button that proclaimed “That Was Easy” every time you pushed it. Certainly nothing about today’s spiritual climate is easy but I am proposing a button we can mentally push when the feelings of anger, frustration, judgment, and even hatred bubble up. Push this button in your mind and hear these words.

“We All Need Grace“

Paul threw down a pretty straight forward statement to the Ephesian church.

Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
(Ephesians 4:32, NLT)

When my impulse is to judge someone I need to push the grace button and remember God pursued me with the gift of undeserved grace. In this rush to judgment social media culture it is so disgustingly easy to go to condemnation first. Remember when the woman caught in very obvious sin was brought before Jesus by a hyped up group of self-righteous judges. When He reminded the mob of their own heart condition they went quietly away.

“Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

“No, Lord,” she said.

And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

Jesus knew her heart had changed. She didn’t need a lecture, spiritual discipline, or penance. She needed forgiveness, release from judgment, and hope. Jesus is our example. He pushed the grace button when the mob wanted condemnation.

In 2022 I want to reset my heart from the damage done by isolation and cultural negativity. I need to push the grace button.

If I can’t forgive then I have forgotten how much I have been forgiven. I need to push the grace button.

When I look with disdain at another person I have forgotten how God sees them. That person is a soul that Jesus loves. I need to push the grace button.

When I don’t accept another brother or sister I have forgotten that I was unacceptable to a Holy God and that it is only because of Jesus that I am acceptable to Him. I need to push the grace button.

When I assume to know the motives of those who oppose me I have forgotten that only God can see the true hearts of others. I need to push the grace button.

When I can’t serve without expectation of personal return I have forgotten that my service should come from gratitude for the amazing grace of Jesus. I need to push the grace button.

Pastor Tullian Tchividjian wrote this about our “aversion” to the radical concept of grace.

“We love the “if/then” proposition: “If” you do this, “then” I will do that. We love “what-goes-around-comes-around” conditionality. It makes us feel safe. It’s easy to comprehend. It makes perfect sense to our grace-shy hearts. It’s makes life formulaic. It breeds a sense of manageability. And best of all, it keeps us in control. We get to keep our ledgers and scorecards.

The logic of grace, on the other hand, is incomprehensible to our law-locked hearts. Grace is thickly counter-intuitive. It feels risky and unfair. It wrestles control out of our hands. It is wild and unsettling. It turns everything that makes sense to us upside-down and inside-out. Law says, “Good people get good stuff; bad people get bad stuff.” Grace says, “The bad get the best; the worst inherit the wealth; the slave becomes a son.” This offends our deepest sense of justice and rightness. We are, by nature, allergic to grace.”

We need to push the grace button and believe this wonderful truth written in Hebrews for another uncertain year ahead.

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. (Hebrews 4:16, NLT)

January 10, 2022
Feeling Like a Misfit this Christmas?

Christmas really is the most wonderful time of the year. I love the music, the memories, the traditions, and the chance to annually think about Burl Ives.

His memory returns with the annual airing of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Ives is the voice of Sam the Snowman who narrates the “enhanced” story of Rudolph.

Rudolph and his elf buddy Hermey don’t fit in with the others. Rudolph looks different than his peers. Hermey is not interested in making toys. In an odd plot twist, Hermey wants to be a dentist. Not surprisingly, his elf supervisor is upset with the unproductive Hermey. So the two outcasts set off to find their purpose and a place to be accepted.

The part of the story that resonates with me these days is when Hermey and Rudolph find their way to the Island of Misfit Toys. All of the toys on this island are castoffs because they are flawed and deemed worthless. There is a “Charlie in the Box” and a train with square wheels. A boat that sinks in water and a squirt gun that shoots jelly. All of these flawed toys are banished to the Island of Misfit Toys simply because they are different.

That is how I picture so many sad and tired followers of Jesus. They see themselves as misfits. They believe they are flawed and not worth much of anything. They have allowed a perceived idea of what a “good” Christian should look like to cause them to feel like they don’t measure up. The doubts overwhelm them. Discouraged followers of Christ start thinking thoughts like these.

I don’t have theological training.
I can’t sing well.
I am not a good teacher.
I am afraid to share my faith.
I feel awkward in groups.
I am not a leader.
I don’t have much to offer.

But that is not how the Bible describes a follower of Christ. Every Christian is described as being part of the body of Christ. Scripture makes it clear that every part of the body of Christ is vital to the healthy function of the church. Henri Nouwen wrote that every follower of Jesus has a God designed role.

“We seldom realize fully that we are sent to fulfill God-given tasks. . . . We act as if we were simply dropped down in creation and have to decide how to entertain ourselves until we die. But we were sent into the world by God, just as Jesus was. Once we start living our lives with that conviction, we will soon know what we were sent to do.”

So if you are feeling like a misfit toy this Christmas season you can trust this truth. You have a divine purpose. God does not make misfits. He creates people in His image with value and great worth. Satan would like you to retreat to your own island of misfits to feel sad and worthless. But God has another gathering place in mind.

The Island of Grace. On that island you are not a misfit. You are a beloved child of God. You are a saint. And in this wonderful place there are no misfits. Every blemish makes you more valuable, not less. Brokenness makes you more beautiful. The miracle of Christmas makes us friends to the King. Paul made that abundantly clear with these words of encouragement to the Church in Rome.

So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God. (Romans 5, NLT)

Friend of God? Hard to feel like a misfit if you believe that is true. Open that gift this year and keep it close to your heart.

Merry Christmas!

December 6, 2021